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GCF (Goodbye Cruel Forum) threads

  1. #1
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    GCF (Goodbye Cruel Forum) threads

    In the past couple of weeks I've seen 3 threads where a member is pouting about something and threatening to leave the forum. There may have been more, but I distinctly recall 3.

    For whatever reasons, lots of members buy into this attention-seeking ploy and they beg the person to stay. And it goes on and on and on. In one case the member is no longer posting and their thread was deleted. But that doesn't usually happen. In fact, one particular member has posted several threads threatening to "leave". Yeah...riiiight.

    It's been quite awhile, but I started a thread that - after over 300 posts - was locked, but not deleted. I PMed a mod and received a reply. I certainly did NOT start a GCF thread. I mean...come ON. That would be pathetic.

    If a member has an issue they can PM a moderator. If someone isn't enjoying SF or they no longer have the time or interest to read/post, they should just move on. Some have done that.

    But these "waah waah, I'm leaving" threads are disruptive, silly, overly-dramatic, and contrary to what someone said.I don't see where they generate "interesting discussion". GCF threads clutter up the board needlessly.

    I feel that threads threatening to leave should immediately be locked and deleted and the person's membership revoked (terminated) quickly before others have a chance to jump into the fray.

    You can't always have things go your way. SF was never meant to be all things to all people. There's a big, wide world out there. You want to leave? Go. Goodbye, good luck, and have a nice life.
    Last edited by applecruncher; 04-15-2019 at 11:45 PM.

  2. #2
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    “The United States has become a place where entertainers and professional athletes are mistaken for people of importance.” -- Robert Heinlein

  3. #3
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    Quote Originally Posted by C'est Moi View Post
    hearty-laugh.gif

  4. #4
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    I don't have a problem with GCW threads.

    I just hate to see people burn their bridges in the heat of the moment.


  5. #5
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    @C'est Moi and Aunt Bea

    We have this emoji

  6. #6
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  7. #7
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    These are also referred to as a YAGE -- Yet Another Grand Exit.


  8. #8
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    I was thinking the same thing but didn’t like to say....

    There are many reasons members may decide to leave, personally I would send PMs to people I’ve got to know during my stay here, then just go, not make a big announcement


  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by Aunt Bea View Post
    I don't have a problem with GCW threads.

    I just hate to see people burn their bridges in the heat of the moment.


    oh that's interesting on what grounds - is it written n the rules??

  10. #10
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    You're right applecruncher, it is a way to get attention. It's the 'poor me' syndrome at work again.

  11. #11
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    I have only left one forum that I joined because a forum friend thought I belonged there.

    I didn't. The members there thought that they were intellectuals of a libertarian persuasion.
    In reality they were sickos who had no respect for anything or anyone.
    They were arrogant and disgusting in their thoughts and language.

    I repeatedly asked the administrator to remove my name from the membership list.
    I gave no reason for my request but in reality I did not want to be associated with that forum in any way.
    They made me feel dirty.

    The admin was highly offended that I wanted out but finally took my membership down. I could no longer log in.
    If people want to leave I think that is should be done with dignity and when they have gone there should be no further mention of them.
    In particular comments about flouncing are unnecessary. Their reasons are their reasons whether stated on not.
    We still think of a powerful man as a born leader
    and a powerful woman as an anomaly - Margaret Atwood.

  12. #12
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    I moderate another forum, and also webmaster/moderate my own forum, plus I'm a member of a variety of other forums and private groups.

    While I agree with a lot of what you've all said, I also think there's sometimes a deeper meaning when someone threatens to leave, or makes a big show of it before they do. In a couple cases I have known those people personally, and though that's not a huge representative slice, still it gave me a deeper insight and made me think more carefully and kindly about the folks who drama-exit.

    The people I knew were just kinda sad, generally lonely people. Neither had much of a life. And yes, the drama was a ploy for attention, but in their cases, it was just a symptom of a deeper situation that seemed like it had to do with very low self-esteem and self-worth issues, insecurity, just a general state of emotional fragility. One of the people I knew was definitely depressed, diagnosed as such, and was being medicated (and in my opinion the meds badly needed adjustment) I don't know about the other person, other than her general air of sadness.

    I'm not making excuses for either of people I knew, nor for any folks here who've done or attempted to do the YAGE/GCW drama-exit. There's no need for it, imho. Still, I think it's not always driven by just some surface bid for attention or shallow need to be noticed, or to create the biggest upset they can. I think sometimes it's an inept but deep attempt to communicate how much hurt the person feels (whether they should or not) for whatever happened that they now feel has driven them to leave, and also the genuine loss they're experiencing at having to go.

    I dunno. I'm not saying this very well. Frustrated because I can't articulate what's in my head. Maybe I need more coffee.

    Part of my point is that beyond their drama and fuss is a genuine deep hurt that they are very ineptly and poorly trying to resolve, either by hoping to be convinced to stay, or by venting enough before they leave that the hurt will be less. Irrational? You bet. But nonetheless very real in their own heads.
    Everything is always OK in the end. If it's not, then it's not the end!

  13. #13
    Join Date
    Dec 2018
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    278
    Nicely said, Ronni. You are a compassionate person.

  14. #14
    Join Date
    Jul 2014
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    Well, I'm one that has threatened to leave, but didn't. Aunt Bea helped me to realize that I actually would miss people on here. To me, whenever someone does a thread, without really thinking about any criticism they could get from the thread, it can hurt the OP when folks don't like what they've said. The OP can get frustrated TRYING to defend what they've said and, it seems like, the more "trying to defend" they do, the more frustrated they get. Then comes the threat to leave and they even have to defend that.

    Some threads done by a forum member can receive no criticism at all, but other threads definitely can.

    I've done some threads that definitely got criticism, and one of them was about making friends with smokers. Some people can handle being around smokers, while others can't/won't. One member stated "if him and his wife don't want to make friends with smokers, there's absolutely nothing wrong with that". Of course, I liked that reply.

    Some folks on forums act like their made of steel and nothing can bother them, then there are others that are different.

  15. #15
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    Mar 2019
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    England
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    You're right Ronni...these people are to be pitied. People use these forums/chat sites for various reasons...not always the obvious ones.

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