TennVet
Member
For years I buried the memories of Vietnam; didn't talk about it at all, and didn't share even with family about my experiences. After retiring from my professional life I tried reviewing things through a different lens. My new activities brought me in contact with peers who had similar life histories. Those similarities ranged from married life, to raising children, career world, loss of a child. You get it, I was beginning to open up about where my life has taken me both the good and bad.
Eventually, I even talked about the what Vietnam had meant to me, both good and bad. I even shared some of that with family, and I found out that they were hungry to know about it, and could relate to how it had impacted their interactions with me for years. Receiving my healthcare at the VA is was rubbing shoulders with veterans and found that my experiences weren't as strange as I had grown to think they were.
I have a beloved son-in-law who encouraged me to share some of that block of my history with him and his growing family. He is smart enough to know that he wanted his children to understand that period of our nation from an intimate source outside of the history books.
Recently, the subject came up about possibly revisiting Vietnam. I was aware that fellow Veterans had made that voyage, and mentally I just rejected the idea completely thinking it would just not be a good thing to do. A guest at our Thanksgiving dinner showed me a completely different view of the subject. This is a successful business man who operates a business in many Southeast Asian locations, including Vietnam.
Learning from my son-in-law that I was a Vietnam combat vet he told me about his father. Turns out his father, also his business partner, had some very gruesome memories of the Vietnam he had seen. He convinced his dad to return with him and see what was the same and what was different. The subject then changed, he suggested that he, his dad, my son-in-law, my grandson and me could make that same trip. I wasn't sure how I felt about that at first, but my analytical mind has chewed on the subject many times since that discussion.
So tell me vets, what are your thoughts on this subject? In a completely different setting someone else had suggested this to me a few years earlier. My response was an emphatic no at that time. I even told that person I hadn't even gotten over the nightmares yet. If it were you, would you go back there? I'm still debating, some days it is still a big no, but on other days I explore in my mind the idea that it might be a healing step and finally bring some closure. Help me out on this one......
Eventually, I even talked about the what Vietnam had meant to me, both good and bad. I even shared some of that with family, and I found out that they were hungry to know about it, and could relate to how it had impacted their interactions with me for years. Receiving my healthcare at the VA is was rubbing shoulders with veterans and found that my experiences weren't as strange as I had grown to think they were.
I have a beloved son-in-law who encouraged me to share some of that block of my history with him and his growing family. He is smart enough to know that he wanted his children to understand that period of our nation from an intimate source outside of the history books.
Recently, the subject came up about possibly revisiting Vietnam. I was aware that fellow Veterans had made that voyage, and mentally I just rejected the idea completely thinking it would just not be a good thing to do. A guest at our Thanksgiving dinner showed me a completely different view of the subject. This is a successful business man who operates a business in many Southeast Asian locations, including Vietnam.
Learning from my son-in-law that I was a Vietnam combat vet he told me about his father. Turns out his father, also his business partner, had some very gruesome memories of the Vietnam he had seen. He convinced his dad to return with him and see what was the same and what was different. The subject then changed, he suggested that he, his dad, my son-in-law, my grandson and me could make that same trip. I wasn't sure how I felt about that at first, but my analytical mind has chewed on the subject many times since that discussion.
So tell me vets, what are your thoughts on this subject? In a completely different setting someone else had suggested this to me a few years earlier. My response was an emphatic no at that time. I even told that person I hadn't even gotten over the nightmares yet. If it were you, would you go back there? I'm still debating, some days it is still a big no, but on other days I explore in my mind the idea that it might be a healing step and finally bring some closure. Help me out on this one......
