Yeah, there are worse things than dying...I hear that!I try to count my blessings that I'm not in worse shape than I am.
I've also accepted the fact that there are worse things than dying.
Just Old and Wearing Out Fast
- Thread starter Ruthanne
- Start date
Good that you don't let the old brain freeze...what would we do without them but sometimes brain impairment can be a part of some illnesses for some such as me...I sure hope it doesn't go on me!
I believe in better living through chemistry. It doesn't take the emotional or mental pain away but it does help make it from bearable all the way to (almost) elation.
Hope that helps.
Yes, thank you. I think chemicals can also be useful, too.
Pecos
Well-known Member
- Location
- Washington State
Intellectually, I know that I am almost 79. Emotionally I think... well never mind except some expletives come into play.
And then along comes those unplanned little episodes that upset my apple cart every time and we just have to grit our teeth and BS ourselves that things really are not that bad. So in my case those little episodes include: hip replacement (and I probably need another in the future), rotator cuff surgery (pure misery for about 8 weeks), Ulcerative Colitis ( still in remission for four years with daily medication), Prostrate Cancer (I am on the downhill slide with this), and then plain old everyday aches and pains that seem to come out of nowhere.
In two weeks I have to go in for a colonoscopy, oh joy, oh joy!
My mindset is that I am pretty unhappy about all these "gifts" and virtually powerless to do much about it except "vent" and "roll with it baby," which is pretty much what my wife does.
And after rereading what I have written, I realize that none of it is all that useful and that I am just standing at your side and venting along with you. I am uncertain if my company on this journey helps you very much my friend.
But you do help very much with venting at my side and I feel all you said has been helpful and I thank you for being there. Yes, I know the joy of colonoscopy and once had a bad one by an inexperienced "doctor" that was very painful. I hear ya in rolling with it, too. I try to also but some days can get to us worse than others, too. This aging experience is not so fun and anyone who thinks so is deluding their selves in my opinion unless their life is full of some great things which don't seem to happen to everyone. I believe having others to share our ups and downs with and our wonderful pets helps a great deal, too. They can show us things we hadn't thought of and be there, too.
Murrmurr
SF VIP
- Location
- Sacramento, California
Before I had back surgery on 2017, I had decided that if my pain didn't get better in 10 years, I'd put myself to sleep. I saved up some Rx meds in an unlabeled pill bottle and locked them in a safe place. It's still there.
After the surgery, my overall pain was reduced by a good 50% for a good part of the day, but the rest of the time it was about as bad as before. My thinking was that it could only get worse as I got older, and I didn't throw that bottle out.
About 3 years after that surgery, my back pain wasn't much worse, but my attitude was. I felt sorry for myself all the time and I thought about those pills now and then. I think if I hadn't gotten a foster care license and Collin hadn't showed up, I'd have thought about those pills a lot more. After a judge decided Collin would go live with his mother, I did.
Then Collin started visiting over the weekends. Then my doctor put me on sertraline, a mood enhancer. Then I started acupuncture and got back to my exercise and meditation routines. I'm not positive which of those things changed my thinking. It's probably the combination.
Sure, I still have pain, but it isn't intolerable, and it's manageable. I remember my grandparents griping about pain, so I suppose it's part of growing old. I just stopped thinking about it all the time. I only think about it when I feel it coming on, and then I do whatever nips it in the bud; sometimes a walk, sometimes a pill or some tea or an exercise. Sometimes I just go sit in my recliner for a while. I know my body, I know my pain, and I know what works best.
So, yeah, I guess you'd say I've accepted the pain and occasional fatigue as part of aging. I accepted that I'm wearing out, and I moved on. I still try things to make myself feel healthier and more energetic, like magnesium, vitamin B, certain foods and whatnot, and if it seems that something does indeed make me feel better, it stays on my shopping list. But really, it comes down to attitude. I just don't feel sorry for myself anymore, and I feel really good most of the day.
Yes, I agree attitude can help. Some with extremely hard diagnoses and multiple ones may have a very hard time with this at times. Life can be discouraging at times to them and the old attitude may suffer. I hope this to encourage those to go on just like we all have despite life's unpredictableness and scary stuff and thank you for your thoughtful replies.
Nathan
SF VIP
- Location
- High Desert- Calif.
Just curious, what exactly does that entail?
Physically, I'm not all that bad. I have the usual aches and pains associated with age but nothing that keeps me in a chair. My problem is that I think I try to do too much and pay for it later. Too much physical exercise ruins my sleep for a couple days and I am miserable. Staying with the physical, I look at others like my neighbor who had a stroke and is one notch above invalid. Down the street, a older guy had a fall which broke his back so he will be in a wheel chair forever. That helps some. In other words, it could be worse.
My mental and emotional state suffers right now. The daily grind is just taking care of what needs to be done until the grim reaper shows up. I'm in search of a solution. I just heard on the radio a sermon on a religious station which was somewhat uplifting, so maybe that's the way to go. Now is a good time to make peace with God anyway since, well...you know.
My mental and emotional state suffers right now. The daily grind is just taking care of what needs to be done until the grim reaper shows up. I'm in search of a solution. I just heard on the radio a sermon on a religious station which was somewhat uplifting, so maybe that's the way to go. Now is a good time to make peace with God anyway since, well...you know.
Murrmurr
SF VIP
- Location
- Sacramento, California
I turn on some meditative music and set a teapot onto a little single burner propane stove. While that heats, I slowly spoon some loose-leaf tea into a small wooden cup and focus on something positive; my kids or grandkids, something nice that happened recently, the weather or the birds...whatever comes to mind. I keep that train of thought while I pour hot water over the tea, and while I sip at it (through a straw with a little strainer at the bottom end). Then I pour another, and another. Usually after 3 or 4 cups, I feel really good. Sometimes I even feel totally awesome.
Seriously, it's a great ritual. Something I picked up from a Brazilian-Portuguese lady I went with for a few years.
Very interesting along with all I've read from you and others. Everything can help us olders get through these life changes and problems--we're all in this mess together!
Old Dummy
Who am I? Why am I here?
- Location
- In the backwoods of NYS
I hear ya, girl.
I had 61 great years: rarely sick, never tired, full of energy, although I suffered with insomnia because I couldn't wind my brain down. Too many things to do, why would I want to go to bed? Then in 2011 I had neck surgery, had prostate cancer a few months later, and three hernia surgeries since.
Now I've been forced to retire because of a rotator cuff problem and severe arthritis in my wrists, which all came on suddenly a month and a half ago.
RA asked: "How do you deal with all your pains and health issues?" I told my doc last week that I'm starting to tune it out. I'm starting to not care because it's too much to absorb.
And so here we are.
I tune a lot of it out at times, too, but also have some "bad days" at times when I can't seem to quiet the old brain. I, too, am trying more and more to tune it all out--there's not a lot that can be done about some things but get our help, maybe take something or another and go on and try to have some good time left.I hear ya, girl.
I had 61 great years: rarely sick, never tired, full of energy, although I suffered with insomnia because I couldn't wind my brain down. Too many things to do, why would I want to go to bed? Then in 2011 I had neck surgery, had prostate cancer a few months later, and three hernia surgeries since.
Now I've been forced to retire because of a rotator cuff problem and severe arthritis in my wrists, which all came on suddenly a month and a half ago.
RA asked: "How do you deal with all your pains and health issues?" I told my doc last week that I'm starting to tune it out. I'm starting to not care because it's too much to absorb.
And so here we are.
I am looking into chemical treatments next month, I have an appointment at nearly the end of June--these doctors are really booked now! I hope these types of things, namely some kind of pills or another can take some of this away.
I wish MJ recreationally was also legal here, too. I would bake some brownies that's for sure~
Old Dummy
Who am I? Why am I here?
- Location
- In the backwoods of NYS
I tune a lot of it out at times, too, but also have some "bad days" at times when I can't seem to quiet the old brain. I, too, am trying more and more to tune it all out--there's not a lot that can be done about some things but get our help, maybe take something or another and go on and try to have some good time left.
Yep, you summed it up nicely.
This all happened by chance, but my two lunch buddies are much older than me, one is 80 another is 86. Hanging around with them makes me feel young sometimes, but I'm catching up with them health-wise. The oldest is actually quite healthy, although he had to have his leg artery replaced a few months ago, and is still recovering.
Aneeda72
Well-known Member
Hmm, I could write so much about pain and how I deal with it, that it might take over this thread, Iāll try not to do that. I have a very very high pain threshold but sometimes even I cannot overcome the pain. Sometimes desperation sets in. I frequently wish I was dead.
I avoid pain pills as much as possible, you build a tolerance to pain pills, I donāt recommend them. You can get a schedule from your doctor to take Advil and Tylenol together. This works as good as a pain pill without the side effects. The goal is not to be out of pain, the goal is to make the pain tolerable. The goal is to take as little as possible of any medication.
Saving up pills in case you decide to ākillā yourself is ignorant IMO. Death by pills is never guaranteed and you can be left in a vegetive state which would be my worst nightmare. However, a couple of years ago I was given a diabetic medication that, had I took a whole pill, would have killed me. I kept those pills for a while, in case I needed them.
A time came when I did. 2018.
A doctorās mistake where he āoverburnedā some spinal nerves, and I left his office screaming, unable to walk, never ending horrific pain, an ER doctor stupid assumption for which he later apologized, and a determination to take those pills. Unless they could get me out of pain. Which was finally accomplished, long story, was a very bad year for me medically.
@Ruthanne I deal with pain by ignoring it as much as possible. I refuse to acknowledge that it hurts. When I do acknowledge it; I imagine, at times, I am a Roman soldier wounded in battle, they didnāt have pain pills. I know I can overcome the pain. They did.
I sometimes beg my grandmother an army nurse, to help me, when I hallucinate her when the pain hits a 9 or 10. Yes, as a last resort, when the pain is at an 8, I take a pain pill. I get spinal shots for pain. Occasionally a trip to the ER, where they call my pain doctor, to get permission to give me a pain shot.
I have so many painful medical issues that sometimes itās impossible to tell what is hurting. So I get what you are saying and I wonder how it is that I just donāt die. But I donāt. Every day I wake up I am a tad disappointed. But up I get, get to it, and carry on. Some days are easier than others.
I have no advice for you @Ruthanne I am so sorry.
I avoid pain pills as much as possible, you build a tolerance to pain pills, I donāt recommend them. You can get a schedule from your doctor to take Advil and Tylenol together. This works as good as a pain pill without the side effects. The goal is not to be out of pain, the goal is to make the pain tolerable. The goal is to take as little as possible of any medication.
Saving up pills in case you decide to ākillā yourself is ignorant IMO. Death by pills is never guaranteed and you can be left in a vegetive state which would be my worst nightmare. However, a couple of years ago I was given a diabetic medication that, had I took a whole pill, would have killed me. I kept those pills for a while, in case I needed them.
A time came when I did. 2018.
A doctorās mistake where he āoverburnedā some spinal nerves, and I left his office screaming, unable to walk, never ending horrific pain, an ER doctor stupid assumption for which he later apologized, and a determination to take those pills. Unless they could get me out of pain. Which was finally accomplished, long story, was a very bad year for me medically.
@Ruthanne I deal with pain by ignoring it as much as possible. I refuse to acknowledge that it hurts. When I do acknowledge it; I imagine, at times, I am a Roman soldier wounded in battle, they didnāt have pain pills. I know I can overcome the pain. They did.
I sometimes beg my grandmother an army nurse, to help me, when I hallucinate her when the pain hits a 9 or 10. Yes, as a last resort, when the pain is at an 8, I take a pain pill. I get spinal shots for pain. Occasionally a trip to the ER, where they call my pain doctor, to get permission to give me a pain shot.
I have so many painful medical issues that sometimes itās impossible to tell what is hurting. So I get what you are saying and I wonder how it is that I just donāt die. But I donāt. Every day I wake up I am a tad disappointed. But up I get, get to it, and carry on. Some days are easier than others.
I have no advice for you @Ruthanne I am so sorry.
Chris21E
Member
- Location
- California
I just hold on to things that are still in play and working not putting too much energy into what has slowed down....I'm thankful no matter what...
Gratitude certainly does help.
Old Dummy
Who am I? Why am I here?
- Location
- In the backwoods of NYS
A little levity for my fellow oldsters:
That's okay and I hear you and hope you will hang in there with us all just trying to get through all this together. Sometimes carrying on is all we can do. Complying with doctors who have our best interests at hand is what seems to be the thing to do but sometimes that even gets tiring too. I hope you will see some good days yet.
Old Dummy
Who am I? Why am I here?
- Location
- In the backwoods of NYS