Life in the Hood, my apartment hood

Reading about all these neighbours I realized I haven’t lived in a large urban setting in 50+ years. I don’t know if I could adapt.
In apartments people give people their space, plus with Covid, very few people are visiting inside. It’s all outside encounters. The leave me alone people stay inside or ignore the occasional greeting.

My apartment has lots of green spaces and I will take pictures. It’s not like the large urban senior apartments that you see which is why I choose NOT to live in one of those.

And while all the kiddos can be and are annoying; they are also energizing, and fun to interact with, and adorable. Yesterday, a sweet little kindergarten boy, playing with four girls, asked if I wanted to see him ride down the stairs on his bike. 😱

The girls, including his three young sisters, assured me he does this “all the time”. I deflected, asking where his helmet was. Mom threw it away, it was too small and they will buy a new one soon. Well, I’d like to see you all in helmets.

Then the lovely three junior high school girls I say hi to, raced down to where we are dragging 3 boys along. The lead girl, hitting her boyfriend told him to introduce himself. They all did. I told them, at 75, I would not remember their names. That’s ok she says as long as you remember we are your favorite kids. As you are our favorite person in the apartment complex. 😊.

Then there is the slightly older kids in the green car who, when they see me, slam on the brakes, roll down their windows, and scream hi at me from street 😂😂😂. I wonder what people think when this display happens.

Living in a multi generational, multi cultural, multi racial apartment complex, for a people watcher, is a bit of heaven on earth. Watching all the various dogs, Talking to all these kids, from the little just walking infants to the teens waiting for the school bus, a true blessing.

I have not been this happy in decades.
 

There are two huskies I see in the dog park, the dog park is under used. The two owners are friends and occasionally take their dogs down to play. Both are male. The bigger husky embarrassed her owner near to death when he kept attempting to mount the other dog, who, frankly, didn’t seem to mind.

The tiny, I have escaped tiny Pomeranian, which I help two small children catch before their “parents killed them”. 😂. Don’t chase the dog guys. Sit down, pretend you have food, he will come and see what’s up. 😊

Lots of mixed noisy chihuahuas and small terrier mixes, a couple of pekingese, couple of French bull dogs, one pit blue, a blue heeler, a red heeler (really aggressive), an 15 year old pit bull dog (not really allowed), and various other dogs that I only see rarely. Several border collies. Most of them quiet as a mouse.
 
Denise, who I talk to frequently, has a Yorkshire terrier. There are a couple in the complex. I met Denise through the dog who was on his walk with her and quaking due to my walker. I said hi, assured her he would get used to the walker and stop shaking and barking. He, of course, has little dog complex.

But now, after a couple of months he is fine. He pulls on his leash, most of them do, but at 5 pounds soaking wet, it’s not a problem. So couple days ago, I run into Denise. Look at my eye she says. WOW looks awful, it has bleed around the iris.

Apparently, she got really stressed, her blood pressure skyrocketed, and her eye bled. She said she went over to Patty’s, you know Patty she says, and she took her blood pressure which was very high. 😮. Did you go to the doctor? Nope. 🤔. You need to go. I will. I got an appointment in a couple weeks. 🤔. You need to go now! She is not having it. 🤦🏻‍♀️

Anyway, I do not know Patty. She gestures, sure you do, she lives over there. Hmm, well, maybe she knows me from somewhere and I don’t remember.

Turns out, 😂, I kind of know Patty. Patty walks once a day in the morning when it is not too cold and not too hot. She is a tall older thin woman with red hair and is diabetic. Denise literally saved her life one day when her sugars were too high and she got her to the doctor. They became friends. I met Patty walking and have talked to her a couple times, but didn’t know her name.

Next time I “run” into her, I ask if she is Patty. Yup. 😊. Patty says she only knows two people in the complex, Denise and me and she finds it unfriendly here. How long have you lived here, I ask. Three years she says 😳. She wants to buy a house and have a garden again. I understand her need for this. She does not have a dog.

I’ve lived here 10 weeks, I have several acquaintances. I am reminded of the forum member who said he lives on the top floor of his apartment and feels left out. In order to have acquaintances (friends if you prefer) you have to interact. I say good morning, hi, and wave to everyone I see, everyone. And listen, and engage, and show sympathy, and comment and make tons of acquaintances who may turn into friends.

Course there are also tons of people who reject an acquaintance 😂, but that’s their issue, not mind. After ten weeks of me saying hi to a guy with a lab, and him pretending I did not exist, he finally burped out a hi. His wife is much more friendly with her greetings, but no conversations. They are out with the dog, a large untrained black lab, dog potties, and back into the house.
 
So a few days later I run into Denise again. She still has not seen the doctor 🙄. I asked when she plans to see him, her eye looks awful. In a week or so she says. I again encourage her to go sooner. She says her blood pressure is a lot better, Patty has checked it for her. I tell her she still needs to see a doctor for her eye.

Again, she says she was just stressed out and tells me about her husband. 😮. Ok, well, hmm, gee, in the rotten husband department he wins. He actually makes my husband look, better. I don’t question why she stayed. I know why she stayed/stays as I know why I stayed/stay. But I did not stay with my first husband, and as bad as he was and he was BAD, I suspect her husband has been worst than my first husband.

She has grown children, Not sure how many. Then she says she owns a house in California. They rent this house and the income from this house supports them. She wants to sell the house cause prices are high right now. I agree, sell the house. I think the market will crash which is, one of the reasons, I sold my house.

She wants to buy a condo or house here instead of paying rent and with the sale of her house in California she could do that (and dump that husband 😂). But the kids want her to keep it and she does. ☹️ Some of us become prisoners of our children as well. I hope she changes her mind; and sells that house.

Like me, like a lot of us, both men and women, she never thought she would be in the position she is in. As to why these people tell me their stories, well, I listen, that’s why. I don’t judge and I have been there and am there now.

Her little terrier is her support system and her baby. She is 11 years old.
 
@Aneeda72, this socialization within the building and area seems way beyond anything I’ve ever heard of. Is this because of the Mormon influence? Doesn’t matter the reason, it’s a darned good thing.
No, not because of the Mormon influence, just the opposite in fact. If the people in the apartment were mainly Mormon, you would be asked if you were LDS. If not, you would be spoken to very little. Utah has really changed over the years and while I do not know percentages anymore, I would guess it’s 50% LDS vs 50% other.

I think it’s because I am very friendly, 😂, non threatening as an elderly woman, and don’t want anything from anyone. I also must add, with Covid killing off our generation, people might have a greater awareness of the fragility of the elderly. Or maybe I just remind everyone of their grandmas or mothers. 😊

Plus, even though I love dogs, and I don’t pet any of their dogs, dogs love me. Dogs have always loved me. But, with few exceptions everyone is responsive to me, even the older teenagers both boys and girls who I say hi to at the bus stop and all say hi back and wish me a good day.

The Hispanic kids, who are taught to appreciate their elders are especially nice. And the three young oriental brother and two sisters are adorable and always thrilled to see and talk to me.

It is amazing. It wasn’t this friendly the last time I live here a year and half ago, but I really think Covid has made a difference.
 
I. also. have several dogs who live within the walls of b=my building, along with their humans. Lots of weiner dogs, and other small ones. They are fun and interesting to interact with.
Many cats as well. Sometimes I like the dogs and cats better than the people.
There are very few cats here that I have seen. There was a feral cat, but I think animal control picked him up a week or so ago. Poor thing, he was eating out of the trash and really thin so I hope they got him. He was really cute.

Then there is a lady that walks her cat on a harness, but her cat is really unhappy about it. I haven’t talked to her as I always seem to be far away when she is out. I have been told by some of the kids that they have a cat. One said two dogs, a cat, and a lizard. 😂
 
@Aneeda72, love your stories and I'm happy you are enjoying your new home. I'd love to see and meet all those dogs you talk about but the people would drive me nuts.
I'm not a people person and when I walk around my neighborhood I'm glad when I don't run into anyone.
It is much more fun to read about your neighborhood adventures.. Keep them coming.
I don’t see all of the people everyday, of course. It depends on when I walk, when they walk, and other factors. Also depends on the weather, the hotter it is the more people stay indoors. And Covid.

I think one of the families that live across from me have Covid. I usually see them everyday and a couple of days ago one of their kids was coughing up a lung. Since then, their kids have not been around and neither are they. They are what I call a kid magnet house, but more about that later.
 
Well, I can not sleep lately. Too worried about the daughter, excited about the dog, and my up coming trip to see the daughter again. So, meet Donna.

Donna was the second person we met upon moving in. Although, it was my husband that met her first, not me. Got trapped by her one day near the mail boxes. She is a very invasive person, always up in everyone’s business, and well liked by most people-it seems. But I have my reservations about her. She is a kid magnet as well. Kid magnets make me nervous.

Due to my background in foster care, I am always nervous of kid magnets. I am not a kid magnet, although kids like me. I have very firm boundary lines. I don’t touch other people’s dogs and I don’t touch other people’s kids.

There is no reason for someone’s seven year old daughter to sit on another adult’s lap. Using my self as an example, I am not a relative, I am not a close friend that you’ve known for years, and even though we live in the same complex you do not know me.

My rule is, if you won’t leave someone alone in your house with your purse and wallet, why would you leave them anywhere with your kid? But then, I know what can happen to kids in a blink of an eye. Stepping off my soap box, 😂.
 
Donna is, I think, in her sixties. She rides around the complex on an electric wheelchair. Like a lot of people in a wheelchair she is able to do limited walking. How much walking? Idk. She is very overweight, has oxygen on the back of her chair which she uses on and off, and a variety of medical issues including diabetes.

She has a large bucket, pooper scooper tools, and goes around the apartment complex picking up all the dog poop that the dogs’ owners don’t pick up. it’s a lot of poop-a lot of people are pigs. She does this in 100 degree weather. She spins a tale to my husband that she does this cause she is bored and it’s better than sitting inside and watching tv all day.

It‘s not.

I don’t believe her. She does this like a job. She doesn’t do it on week ends, or holidays. And a volunteer with her multiple medical issues would not be out in 100 degree weather picking up poop. A volunteer would not ask me to ”report” to her if I see anyone not picking up their dogs poop. Cause the apartment fines people for this. A volunteer would not ask me to tell her if I notice she has missed any dog poop collection spots. 😂

She might not get a check, but she must get some kind of compensation for doing this, which is fine. But why lie? Pretty sure there is not a long line of people waiting to do this. But the regular maintenance staff can and will do it. This is one of the issues I discussed with Jackie. She does not believe Donna either. Anyway.

Donna lives with her one of her children in one of the townhouses. Some of the townhouses have one bedroom down and two bedrooms up. Donna has a little terrier mix. If this fellow pulls on his leash, suddenly, he gets harshly corrected. If he barks overmuch, he gets slapped around the muzzle after she pulls him to her on his leash.

I spoke to her about this. I told her by the time she gets this under ten pound dog close enough to hit, he has no ideal what he is being hit for; and they are not gentle taps. Oh, she says, he knows. Apparently, she will kick the dog as well, according to her.

Yup, Donna is pretty popular, but not with me. Based on the way she treats the dog, I would not let my kid anywhere near her. But she gives the kids attention, and a lot of them are lacking in attention, so she is a kid magnet. Ugh.
 
Donna says that her granddaughter has a disorder, forget the name, that makes her unable to go into stores etc. I‘ve met the granddaughter, later teens-early 20’s, she has talked to me briefly. I can not judge if she has a disorder or not.

She has a lap puppy. The lab puppy will be ”her service dog” that enables her to go out. 🤦🏻‍♀️ The lab puppy was on sale at a good price from a person that breeds labs for service dogs. 😳. Donna says as soon as they got the puppy, it laid on her granddaughter’s chest thus calming her.

I might be able to sell Donna a bridge in New Jersey.

Puppies lay on your chest, that’s what puppies do. They listen to heart beats. When my husband held Henry, our soon to be poodle puppy, Henry immediately melted onto his chest and went to sleep. This does not make Henry a therapy dog. In fact, if this lab pup was on sale, from a professional breeder, it was because early testing showed he was not service dog material.

And he’s not. The lab puppy, at three months, is beautiful. Unfortunately, he is afraid of my walker. Granddaughter says he is afraid of grandma’s wheelchair. (He’s probably afraid of grandma.). The lab puppy is shy. A shy dog will never be a service dog, never.

Instead of rushing towards me, or anyone, in true lab puppy dog behavior; he backs away to sit behind his owner. It is rare to see a shy lab, but it does happen. More about Donna later.
 
Cell phone died, got to charge it, and finish my walk.

I meet Donna in June shortly after my husband met her. It is hot, and I am wearing shorts. She is in the hallway, between my apartment and the next apartments talking to Nicky. We say hi. Donna looks at me, looks at Nicky, and says “is that an ankle bracelet? I’ve never seen anyone your age with an ankle bracelet.” 🤦🏻‍♀️

And she laughs. Idiot. I try not to judge people, I really do. But my instant assessment, not judgement, is that the woman is an idiot. apparently she has never seen anyone with an ankle bracelet, because if she had seen someone with an ankle bracelet, she would know that I am not wearing an ankle bracelet.

Of course, she would not have seen someone on tv with an ankle bracelet, because she does not watch tv, she picks up dog poop instead. 😬. No, I say it’s not an ankle bracelet, it’s a fitbit. What, she asked, is a fitbit. 🤦🏻‍♀️

It’s something you shove up an idiots butt, I think, quietly, to myself. But I like Nicky and want to be a solid acquaintance of hers, so I explain what a fitbit is. Donna says, ”well, can I tell people it’s an ankle bracelet?”

You mean, I think to myself, “can you spread a rumor throughout the complex that I am a felon who requires constant monitoring?”. Idiot. Sure I say, why not. 😂. Whatever. She asked my name and says she won’t remember it because she has early onset Alzheimer’s. I doubt she has Alzheimer’s, I really do. And she has remembered my name just fine.

Later, weeks later, I have seen Donna a lot. Had a few conversations with her. Seen that she is a kid magnet. The wheelchair, the cute dog, the adult comments about how great she is to pick up the dog poop and on and on; gives the kids a good impression of her. And she has full access to the kids running around the complex, except for the few that don’t like her. Those are the trouble makers, the ones that don’t like her.

She takes Nicky’s daughter, a seven year old, and has her stand with her feet on the feet of her wheelchair, Donna”s feet are spread so the child can lean back against her, full body against her full body, and off they go, riding fast down the sidewalk. The little girl is having a blast.

There are so many dangers in this set up. I am appalled. At the very least the child needs a helmet for this activity. But the girl is not my kid. Later Donna confides in me that the little girl is driving her crazy, and will not leave her be. Hmm.

What do you all think?
 
Cell phone died, got to charge it, and finish my walk.

I meet Donna in June shortly after my husband met her. It is hot, and I am wearing shorts. She is in the hallway, between my apartment and the next apartments talking to Nicky. We say hi. Donna looks at me, looks at Nicky, and says “is that an ankle bracelet? I’ve never seen anyone your age with an ankle bracelet.” 🤦🏻‍♀️

And she laughs. Idiot. I try not to judge people, I really do. But my instant assessment, not judgement, is that the woman is an idiot. apparently she has never seen anyone with an ankle bracelet, because if she had seen someone with an ankle bracelet, she would know that I am not wearing an ankle bracelet.

Of course, she would not have seen someone on tv with an ankle bracelet, because she does not watch tv, she picks up dog poop instead. 😬. No, I say it’s not an ankle bracelet, it’s a fitbit. What, she asked, is a fitbit. 🤦🏻‍♀️

It’s something you shove up an idiots butt, I think, quietly, to myself. But I like Nicky and want to be a solid acquaintance of hers, so I explain what a fitbit is. Donna says, ”well, can I tell people it’s an ankle bracelet?”

You mean, I think to myself, “can you spread a rumor throughout the complex that I am a felon who requires constant monitoring?”. Idiot. Sure I say, why not. 😂. Whatever. She asked my name and says she won’t remember it because she has early onset Alzheimer’s. I doubt she has Alzheimer’s, I really do. And she has remembered my name just fine.

Later, weeks later, I have seen Donna a lot. Had a few conversations with her. Seen that she is a kid magnet. The wheelchair, the cute dog, the adult comments about how great she is to pick up the dog poop and on and on; gives the kids a good impression of her. And she has full access to the kids running around the complex, except for the few that don’t like her. Those are the trouble makers, the ones that don’t like her.

She takes Nicky’s daughter, a seven year old, and has her stand with her feet on the feet of her wheelchair, Donna”s feet are spread so the child can lean back against her, full body against her full body, and off they go, riding fast down the sidewalk. The little girl is having a blast.

There are so many dangers in this set up. I am appalled. At the very least the child needs a helmet for this activity. But the girl is not my kid. Later Donna confides in me that the little girl is driving her crazy, and will not leave her be. Hmm.

What do you all think?
I think it is an accident waiting to happen!
 
Pictures, the small Australian Shepherd who is 10 years old instead of 10months old like I thought and owner
 

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The green spaces, playgrounds, views of the mountains, my apartment ground floor, and the Amazon hub, mailboxes
 

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