Domestic Violence Remains a Problem in the U.S.

911

911

Well-known Member
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USA
According to FBI statistics. DV remains a problem here in the U.S. Approximately, 10-12 million men and women are abused somehow each year. Many states have programs to aid people that have been or are being abused. They aid by helping them to get out of an abusive relationship and starting a new life. They also teach people how to get help if you are an abuser and want to be a better person.

For law enforcement, the problem is when the police is called to a DV situation. Too many times, the Officer gets hurt trying to intervene. Those are dangerous situations all around. Men that beat up on women are not men. Not even close to being a man. Nothing irked me more than going on a DV call and find a women all beat to hell and the male who did it has left the scene. We put out a BOLO and usually pick them up by evening at the corner bar.

I urge anyone that is in a domestic violence situation to get help. I understand you may be afraid because of threats you may have received, but it has to end. Do yourself a favor and take the first step by calling the National hotline at 800-799-7233. If you have a friend or grandchild that is in a toxic relationship and worse, please urge them to make the call. They cannot change the person.
 

Sentences need to be stiffer. Not only for DV but for SA, too. And even stiffer for SA against a minor.

My cousin's husband was up on felony DV charges because he restrained her, used a weapon, and her injuries included broken bones and teeth. The charges were dismissed. And it was his 3rd offense! It was unbelievable.

He presented himself as very remorseful, and he comes across as charming and intelligent, so maybe that worked on the judge(s)....or maybe laws and courts need to be absolutely intolerant of these offenses.
 
Murrmurr said:
Sentences need to be stiffer. Not only for DV but for SA, too. And even stiffer for SA against a minor.

My cousin's husband was up on felony DV charges because he restrained her, used a weapon, and her injuries included broken bones and teeth. The charges were dismissed. And it was his 3rd offense! It was unbelievable.

He presented himself as very remorseful, and he comes across as charming and intelligent, so maybe that worked on the judge(s)....or maybe laws and courts need to be absolutely intolerant of these offenses.
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Third offense ? That's fricked up. I hope your cousin has been able to recover from her physical injuries.
 
MarkinPhx said:
Third offense ? That's fricked up. I hope your cousin has been able to recover from her physical injuries.
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Totally messed up.

She mended just fine, but it changed how she lives. She moved to a neighborhood where the houses are closer together, got to know all her neighbors really well, carpools to and from work, and she changes her phone number often. And she hasn't been in a relationship since their divorce.
 
I have never suffered DV, I did have some scary experiences when my husband was dying of cancer, he had to have brain surgery for a bleed that made his behavior frightening. He was never violent but said things that scared me for others he felt wronged by.

We all say we would never put up with things of this sort. The question is how often do we think about the fear someone has to try and leave. Where to go, how to have a home, how to feed the children, how to find a job? If you know or suspect this, please offer any help you can. Do the research for them, find the shelters, find the financial and housing benefits and if there is no other choice call the police.
 
I was reading an article recently entitled - Are Humans Innately Agressive written just under 40 years ago. I probably think a new thread would be better and we can relate to this later maybe? I'll try?
 
I had no idea this was such a problem among people 50 and older. Or are we just knee-jerking to the tune of some current mass media diatribe designed to distract from the economy and multiple wars of aggression going on?
 
I had a flight attendant that came to work on my plane one evening. I seldom notice F/As, but every now and then, I have reason to communicate with one or two. The one evening, I asked the Purser who was in charge of feeding the pilots and she told me Barbara was. I asked her if she would feed us early because I do not like to eat late due to going to bed in a hotel at 11 at night.

When she brought the food into the cockpit and handed me my napkin, I noticed her hand was full of scratches and cuts and then her sleeve moved up her arm and I saw some bruising. I asked her how did she get them. She was lying to me and I knew it. There was no doubt, the bruising was from applied pressure.

I told her if she is being abused, she needs to call the HELP line United had setup. She wouldn't and a few weeks later, I got word that she had the heck beat out of her by her live-in boyfriend and she told the cops at the hospital who it was, but he was n the run. The cops soon caught him and after all was said and done, he ended up with being sentenced to a 20 years in state prison. I think he got out in 10, but she had divorced him and was warned if he went within 500 feet of her, he would serve the other 10 years.
 
dilettante said:
I had no idea this was such a problem among people 50 and older. Or are we just knee-jerking to the tune of some current mass media diatribe designed to distract from the economy and multiple wars of aggression going on?
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You don't seriously think DV is a worn out old diatribe, do you?

People have a tendency to forget about crucial issues like DV while actual worn out diatribes keep their minds occupied until some news outlet highlights a real ongoing problem.

Did you know that the charge for raping a 9yr-old can be reduced to a misdemeanor? Even if it's charges as a felony the offender can get a suspended sentence, and ordered to wear an ankle bracelet for a few months. And it can be removed in only several weeks because s/he didn't offend in those weeks ...at least, not as far as anyone can tell. And children certainly aren't likely to tell if they're promised that their family will die if they do.

But, I'm sinking into a diatribe I digress....
 
I think the question asked in the other thread like " is aggression still a human trait or has been for ever more?" is still being well answered here??
 
Murrmurr said:
You don't seriously think DV is a worn out old diatribe, do you?

People have a tendency to forget about crucial issues like DV while actual worn out diatribes keep their minds occupied until some news outlet highlights a real ongoing problem.

Did you know that the charge for raping a 9yr-old can be reduced to a misdemeanor? Even if it's charges as a felony the offender can get a suspended sentence, and ordered to wear an ankle bracelet for a few months. And it can be removed in only several weeks because s/he didn't offend in those weeks ...at least, not as far as anyone can tell. And children certainly aren't likely to tell if they're promised that their family will die if they do.

But, I'm sinking into a diatribe I digress....
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Not in Pennsylvania. If you raped a 9-y/o child, you will be charged with "Involuntary Deviate Sexual Intercourse with a Child."
This is a first degree felony and you will do prison time. A long prison sentence will be handed down. You are probably looking at 20 years, plus a $25,000 fine. Fines can be recovered from seizing your property, taking it out of any securities or savings, pay when you get out and get a job, tax refunds, etc.
 
911 said:
Not in Pennsylvania. If you raped a 9-y/o child, you will be charged with "Involuntary Deviate Sexual Intercourse with a Child."
This is a first degree felony and you will do prison time. A long prison sentence will be handed down. You are probably looking at 20 years, plus a $25,000 fine. Fines can be recovered from seizing your property, taking it out of any securities or savings, pay when you get out and get a job, tax refunds, etc.
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I have literally watched state prosecuting attorneys present offers to some of these guys' defense lawyers, and the defense and judge accepting the offers, usually for a reduced charge and sentence. Texas is one of the tougher states I've seen. It surprised me that Missouri seems to be among the more lenient.

Of course, some weight is given to the accused's history....I was recalling an actual case. The victim was a 9yr-old girl, the accused, her uncle, had no criminal history, penetrative assault was not proven because the child was not taken to a doctor and never examined by one, so the charge was reduced to Inappropriate Touching.

Obviously, part of the problem was that her parents didn't take her to a doctor ...or do much of anything, really (fear of CPS, I assume). They didn't even report it to the police, her grandfather did.

It really highlighted how crucial it is for the adults of an assaulted child to act responsibly (and protectively!), and to go into court with all the evidence they can possibly get. After all, the defendant is "assumed innocent." It also highlights that prosecutors shouldn't offer deals, at least not in certain cases....at least. I get that they want a guilty plea so an offender has that on record, but the record won't be accurate. Not in this case, anyway.
 
well we are an evolving species - yes - no? but we are not all evolving at the same rate - yes - no? so some of us have still retained the "aggressive gene" and some lost it ? yes that's it should have seen that a few threads back??
 
Murrmurr said:
I have literally watched state prosecuting attorneys present offers to some of these guys' defense lawyers, and the defense and judge accepting the offers, usually for a reduced charge and sentence. Texas is one of the tougher states I've seen. It surprised me that Missouri seems to be among the more lenient.

Of course, some weight is given to the accused's history....I was recalling an actual case. The victim was a 9yr-old girl, the accused, her uncle, had no criminal history, penetrative assault was not proven because the child was not taken to a doctor and never examined by one, so the charge was reduced to Inappropriate Touching.

Obviously, part of the problem was that her parents didn't take her to a doctor ...or do much of anything, really (fear of CPS, I assume). They didn't even report it to the police, her grandfather did.

It really highlighted how crucial it is for the adults of an assaulted child to act responsibly (and protectively!), and to go into court with all the evidence they can possibly get. After all, the defendant is "assumed innocent." It also highlights that prosecutors shouldn't offer deals, at least not in certain cases....at least. I get that they want a guilty plea so an offender has that on record, but the record won't be accurate. Not in this case, anyway.
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If you don't have evidence that a crime was committed anything can happen, I guess. However, had that been my child, he would be very lucky if he could walk anytime during the rest of his life, let alone be breathing.
 
I had a friend who was abused and finally her husband struck her near to death and then buried her alive in the back of their home. When they came to arrest him, he shot himself. They had a boy, 9 years old, who was taken in by her brother. It was so sad.
 

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