Would You Plate a Meal for Guests?

I just serve water (or juice for kiddies). Afterward with dessert, there would be tea/coffee. As for saying grace, we don’t. If I am at a gathering where grace is said, I would remain silent and be respectful of their tradition.

oscash said:

I used to always have platters on the table so everyone could serve themselves. I was also just wondering if Grace Before Meals is said at your place. We never did it, in my parent's day, but my eldest sister started doing it a few years ago, calling everyone
to attention to say it, she even started it in restaurants. I think it's a personal thing and should be said quietly to yourself. Thoughts on this?

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That's an interesting question. We don't have the habit. Sometimes I say grace at special meals like Easter and Christmas, but we don't say it on a regular basis. My husband's brother and his wife will be visiting us next week and they will always say grace at our table. That's fine with me, I rather like it, but they also say it in the restaurant if we go out to eat and I have "views" against that -- but I keep them to myself.

I use AI to say the nightly prayer for me.

I never have had people dining at my home, restaurants are the way to go. I hate cooking and cleaning up. Luckily my family and friends all feel the same way. The only meal whereby we would have family together to eat at home is Christmas. And it would only be 6 family members or less. And no plating at home, it's help yourself.

It reminds me of the first Thanksgiving dinner my brother-in-law attended. He came from a background where things were done "properly" and with a lot more "decorum" than my family observes.

So, Thanksgiving dinner itself at 1-ish was normal. Everyone sat around the table and ate. So far, so good. Everyone declared that they were beyond full and "would never be able to eat again". Everyone wanders off to take a nap, go for a swim, watch a game on TV, etc.

Come about 4 p.m., the usual nom-noms start. One guest decides she is a bit peckish and "just wants a bite". She gets a plate and gets a snack out of the refrig. Pretty soon, a couple more get hungry. One just wants a piece of pie to "hold him off til we eat again". One is ready for a full meal and fixes a plate.

By five, several are hungry again and start getting everything out of the refrigerators. Food is put out in the kitchen and more and more wander in to fill their plates with varying items. Some are eating in the dining room, some are out on the patio, some are in front of the TV. Some still aren't hungry. They'll eat later and take a chance that their favorite things will still be there.

Brother-in-law is HORRIFIED! "You mean we're not sitting down together at the table???" Nope, we're not sitting down together at the table. Anybody who wants to sit down at the table is perfectly free to do so. Everybody else is fine with the usual activity. Some are leaving and there's one or two who actually show up now because they were Thanksgiving-ing at somewhere else. They're ready to eat again. Everybody's milling around and the dogs are hopeful. Very hopeful.

It's now 8 p.m. and the third shift is getting hungry again. At this point, people are standing in front of the refrigerators with a fork in hand to spear the last deviled egg or just get a chunk of cold dressing....for the road...

Anyway, that's how we used to do it. Sadly, now we don't do Thanksgiving in the same spot anymore, not even the same state. In some cases, not even the same country. Everybody goes off in different directions.

I miss it. I really do.

I grew up with ice water as the standard beverage for adults, milk for the kids.

There was plenty of drinking in my family but never with a meal. On holidays my grandmother would look the other way if the men went out to the barn and had a beer.

Grace was a tradition at home and a quiet unspoken moment in a restaurant unless small children were present.

I still don’t connect alcoholic beverages with food and ice water is my drink of choice with meals.

Milk is my drink of choice. If I know the guests drink wine, I’ll serve it. There‘re some who don’t drink anything with a meal.

Jules said:

Do you serve a meal for guests family style or plated? I’ve sometimes thought it would be easier to serve the meal plated like in a restaurant. The table is small.

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It depends on what I'm making for dinner and who is coming. Sometimes I plate, and sometimes I serve family style. Beverages are typically sparkling mineral water such as San Pellegrino and wine. Coffee is served with dessert for those who would like it.

These days we no longer have "people" over for meals. It seems that everyone who isn't on a medically restricted diet is either, "vegan", "gluten free", uber "organic", or on some other fad diet. It just isn't worth the frustration . If we want to get together with a group, we take them to a restaurant.

oscash said:

I used to always have platters on the table so everyone could serve themselves. I was also just wondering if Grace Before Meals is said at your place. We never did it, in my parent's day, but my eldest sister started doing it a few years ago, calling everyone
to attention to say it, she even started it in restaurants. I think it's a personal thing and should be said quietly to yourself. Thoughts on this?

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I agree with the part in bold.

When my daughter-in-law was a newlywed she gave her first dinner party. Just one couple was invited so there would be four at table.
They sat down to dinner, and she laid down the serving platters. Because her budget was very tight, each platter contained exactly four servings.
The entree was chicken-fried steak. But a guest took two.

My family and associates have the table manners of a wild pack of starving hyenas.

Ooops Jules, when I first read the title 'Would you Plate a Meal for Guests' I was imagining no plate, just slapping it on the table surface

Over the years when having friends for meals it's plated up and sat at the table in the dining room type thing.
For a party type scenario, it's bowls of this and that dotted about and help yourself to 'proper more substantial foodstuffs' in various dishes/plates etc lined up on the kitchen surface or in the conservatory.

Where I live now, I've no dining room or table for sitting, so I don't do meals as in cooked meals any more. Just get out side tables and offer whatever on large plates with side plates for their use.

I do a little plating for guests. It slows me down in a good way. I warm the plates in a low oven, add a small spoon of sauce first, then the food, and wipe the rim so it looks calm and tidy. On busy evenings I plate the first serving to set the portion and the look, then let everyone help themselves. My easy company supper is these creamy slow cooker tacos. Soft tortillas, mild sauce, a sprinkle of something crisp on top. It feels special without tiring my hands, and the leftovers are kind the next day.

IrishEyes said:

I always do serve yourself, whether at table or on the counter if not enough room (buffet style). I never know who is on a diet and who has dietary restrictions.

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I've rarely plated a meal for anyone over 8 years old - certainly not for company. Whether it's just DH and me, family, friends or a big party, everyone serves themselves. Usually buffet style rather than passed at the table.

My circle of family and close friends includes omnivores, vegetarians, lacto-ovo vegetarians, strict vegans, a gluten-free vegan, plant based eaters, pescatarians, nondairy eaters, one with a serious allergy to cumin and cilantro, a couple with nut allergies, and who knows what-all else. I tag all non-obvious dishes.

The only dessert I always plate is birthday cake.

When our gatherings exceed 10-12 people (the size of my DR table), small groups eat in adjacent rooms. With parties over 25, people spill into the DR, kitchen, family room and living room.

I'm a casual person, through and through. Formality is neither my preference nor my strong suit.