A good laugh for when you're having a bad day

AprilSun

AprilSun

Senior Member
I went to Tractor Supply to buy dog food. While in line, the woman behind me asked me if I had a dog. šŸ˜³ I just stared at her... Why the heck would I be buying dog food, CRAZY? So being sarcastic I told her no, that I didnā€™t have a dog, that I was starting the dog food diet again, that I probably shouldn't because I ended up in the hospital last time, but weighed 20 pounds less! I told her it was the perfect diet- all you had to do is carry the kibbles in your pockets and eat one or two every time you feel hungry.
(I have to mention that practically everyone in line was interested in my story.)
Frightened, the woman asked me if I ended up in the hospital because the dog food had poisoned me. Of course not! I was admitted because I was in the middle of the street trying to smell a bulldogā€™s butt and was hit by a truck. I thought the man behind her was going to have a heart attack because he was laughing soooooo hard!
 

April Sun: HONESTLY? Did you really say that? That's hilarious! I applaud you! I can't BELIEVE you said that!!! I wish you lived nearby. You would be my best friend!
 

Gaer said:
April Sun: HONESTLY? Did you really say that? That's hilarious! I applaud you! I can't BELIEVE you said that!!! I wish you lived nearby. You would be my best friend!
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No, I didn't say it but as StarSong said, it's an old joke. But, it sounds like something I would have said to certain people if they caught me at the right time. I just thought it was too funny not to share. I know it still makes me laugh today.
 
Think we need to "cultivate the ability to see the ridiculous" these days. One day the phone rang while my mom and I were having our morning coffee. She always loved leopard prints...that morning remember she was wearing a leopard print caftan and leopard print big fuzzy slippers the cat loved to attack.

She answered the phone and said nothing, took her coffee and walked across the kitchen to get more saying "I see" and so forth listening and replying for several minutes. Then she started lecturing the caller "you know it takes two to tango - your should remember that, get your priorities straight, and you shouldn't be attacking me for it- address the source dear...after all I'm a 75 year old legally blind old lady and you should be directing your accusations to the right party. Then she hung up the phone, came back and sat down.

I ask "mom who was that?" She laughed and said "wrong number...she was chewing me out for having an affair with her husband."
 
Thank you @AprilSun and @Liberty

for giving me those much-needed smiles, today!

Plus I am always glad to see you drop in, AprilSun.

@Jass66 I did love those books too, and I could use one, about now. Just those simple and dumb ones, would be fine.
 
AprilSun, I took your advice. I went on that ACNO diet. (AllCanineNutritionOnly) I lost 20 lbs, so far. I know you were kidding about sniffing a bulldogs butt And spare me the lame jokes about my coat getting shiny.. Yet I have to say the diet does work. I've lost the weight, and I don't feel hungry ar all.
 
Well Fuzzy, from your picture on the avatar, you didn't look like you needed to lose the weight, but if you feel better, then that is good and remember, we like you, whether you are thin or plump! :):ROFLMAO:
 
I ran out of food & my heat stopped working today.

For lunch, I licked the inside of a bag of instant onion soup. For dessert, I had a Tang Wipe (a crust of moldy bread, wiped around the inside of an empty jar of Tang.)

For heat, I set a rat on fire & let him run around the house.
 
win231 said:
I ran out of food & my heat stopped working today.

For lunch, I licked the inside of a bag of instant onion soup. For dessert, I had a Tang Wipe (a crust of moldy bread, wiped around the inside of an empty jar of Tang.)

For heat, I set a rat on fire & let him run around the house.
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By any chance do you live in NOLA? Rats are taking over the streets in the Quarter.
 

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