Anti Family Daughter n Son in law

Patnono

Member
Location
Whittier,Ca
One of my daughters is learning disabled, NOT retarded which she will probably never be able to make enough income to live on her own? Her and my daughter who's married have always had a rough relationship, she would at times bully her growing up. Well my daughter had a baby who is now 5 seem to brought them close together, she can't have children. I was worried where would she live when I die? Well she said she could live with her and her husband. Well recently I found out that her sister is still bullying her. And her husband says not good things about her to my boyfriend. My daughter is Not good at defending herself. My son-in-law has no patience with my grandson. So living with my daughter would Not be a good place for her to live? Now I'm back to worrying where will live? My daughter n son-in-law lack EMPATHY. I didn't raise her that way. Seems that they Hate people? I hear how they talk about his family. I feel like I want nothing to do with them?
 

We love our children but that doesn't mean they are perfect, or that we have to actually like them. It doesn't sound as though your married daughter has the ideal environment for either her own child or your other daughter. How does your disabled daughter feel? Is she very unhappy about living with them? If the situation is intolerable, then social services might be able to help. Your disabled daughter might have to live in a hostel, but T least you won't be worrying about her.
 
You have a mess on your hands. I think Social Services would be a good place to start. Unlike years ago, there are agencies available today that do tend to the needs of the impaired.

I have always had a special place in my heart for those that are less privileged than myself, meaning that they cannot take care of their self alone. People can be mean and also take advantage of the impaired, so someone has to help them through life. It’s the right thing to do.

I wish you the best in this situation.
 

Thanks for writing, she doesn't live with them. I'm just trying to make plans for the future. I have been researching the possible optional housing for her. My daughter isn't good at Confrontation, she'll cry hysterically. I've already let my daughter know I'm Not approving of her behavior. Something's going on with her and she's taking it out on us? So NO MORE.
 
Thanks for writing, she has a social worker right now whose been helping her with job training. I'll speak to my daughter to talk to her about this. I'll feel more comfortable knowing she'll have a place to live.
 
Thanks for writing, she doesn't live with them. I'm just trying to make plans for the future. I have been researching the possible optional housing for her. My daughter isn't good at Confrontation, she'll cry hysterically. I've already let my daughter know I'm Not approving of her behavior. Something's going on with her and she's taking it out on us? So NO MORE.


Has she been diagnosed? If so, what is her diagnosis?
 
She was diagnosed when she was in 3rd grade, severe dyslexia. She's gotten better, they said she would be unemployable...she proved them Wrong, she has a job. But is still limited somewhat. Dyslexia is hereditary, her dad's side of the family. When we got together he never told me. So I feel guilty for this. I Never gave up on her, the school did.
 
I'm glad you've told us exactly what the problem is. So actually she's perfectly normal, she just has a problem with reading and writing. Many people in the world of art have the same problem but have had successful careers. However, if she allows her sister to bully her, perhaps she lacks confidence? It sounds as though she hasn't been given the help she needs. The educational people should have helped her train for employment that doesn't require literary skills, something like horticulture perhaps?
 
Yea, that's typical of the schools for giving up on students. I was on them all the time. They hated seeing me at ALL their meetings. I'll be having a talk with my daughter about her behavior. My other daughter along with the reading and writing has memory issues and processes things differently. My other kids don't seem to believe there's anything wrong with their sister? So they think she does things on purpose.
 
Quote
"One of my daughters is learning disabled, NOT retarded which she will probably never be able to make enough income to live on her own?"


Kind of tough to deal with, but it's not to late to try to help your daughter. Thanks to the internet there are sites like this & others to give serious consideration to.
https://study.com/articles/careers_for_people_with_dyslexia.html


I know exactly how you feel about what will happen to your child once you are gone. We experienced that same concern for one son when he was 6 yrs. old. Back then there was not the help available there is now. Use your computer skills to do as much research as you can. Use what you learn that could be possible for your daughter to earn a living wage & work with any social agency that can help your daughter towards being self reliant.
 
Thank you for your support, she finally got help but like about 20 year's later. We got a lot of push back/stalling by the government. I was on them since she was 18, she now 35. The jobs she got, she got on her own, but not enough to live on. She finished a phlebotomy course last December that the state paid for. I think her lack of self confidence is keeping her from moving forward. I've been pushing her, but not too hard.
 


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