Are we crazy to move??

Colleen said:
I've thought of that, but where??
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We can't stand the dry dry air as it drives our skin crazy, so more humid weather is best for us, but if you only want dry weather then obviously its southwest. if you get on I-10 and drive east, then you could certainly find some warm areas that might fit your bill.

Hub couldn't stand living in the north due to his old football injuries. I could hear each step he took when coming down the stairs in the winter. We've had a wonderful life in the south and I'm sure you could find some warm nice place that you could enjoy. Everything has "pros and cons" of course you know.
 
Only you can answer this question. The better question is: is this in my best interests and sensible?
I asked myself this many times, younger than you. I finally realized that I had too much anxiety, worry, to start over where I knew nobody at all! Also a lack of money for my housing choices.
Everyone is different. It is easy for others to encourage you but they are not your age and DK you.
 
Liberty said:
We can't stand the dry dry air as it drives our skin crazy, so more humid weather is best for us, but if you only want dry weather then obviously its southwest. if you get on I-10 and drive east, then you could certainly find some warm areas that might fit your bill.

Hub couldn't stand living in the north due to his old football injuries. I could hear each step he took when coming down the stairs in the winter. We've had a wonderful life in the south and I'm sure you could find some warm nice place that you could enjoy. Everything has "pros and cons" of course you know.
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When we first retired in 2001, we bought a 5th-wheel and truck and left CA forever. We registered in Livingston, TX, as that's where we were told by other RVer's that that was the best place to set up our mail (with a PMB) and it was forwarded to us no matter where we landed. We did that for 3 1/2 years and living in our RV. Then, we thought about buying a house again and since we wintered in Brownsville, we considered that. We settled on Victoria, TX instead. My husband is a trap-shooter and loves to fish so Victoria was ideal for us because there is a large trap-shooting club there and he competed in San Antonio many times. We bought a nice 3 bedroom, 2 bath house on a large fenced corner lot and enjoyed living there with very low property taxes. We left there in 2008 to go to PA to be closer to family until we came to AZ in 2014 (BIG mistake!). We considered Victoria again, however, the prices for property tax has skyrocketed and a lot of other things have changed there so we scratched our move back to Victoria. Too bad because we liked the area.
 
Victor said:
Only you can answer this question. The better question is: is this in my best interests and sensible?
I asked myself this many times, younger than you. I finally realized that I had too much anxiety, worry, to start over where I knew nobody at all! Also a lack of money for my housing choices.
Everyone is different. It is easy for others to encourage you but they are not your age and DK you.
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Amen! I'm glad that we have time to consider many angles of moving and I'm doubtful that such a big move (over 2100 miles!) is the right thing for us. We miss so much about where we came from...BUT...maybe we waited too long. We should have done this 5 years ago, but I couldn't convince hubby so here we are. I've been looking at other options closer to where we are. Hubby and I need to have a serious talk ;). Yes, money is always a factor and I'm concerned that the housing market is doing what it did not long ago and then it took a dive and people that over paid for a house were caught upside down. And property taxes are crazy, too. I'm afraid we're trying to live in the past when we were younger and it was easier to cope with the weather, etc. It's time to re-evaluate our priorities. Thanks for being honest with your comments. I appreciate it.
 
@Colleen, do you have family and friends that you’re still in close contact with back in PA? Would they be part of your support system or do you have help from DH’s family in Arizona?
 
Jules said:
@Colleen, do you have family and friends that you’re still in close contact with back in PA? Would they be part of your support system or do you have help from DH’s family in Arizona?
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My family is gone and I don't have a relationship with my son, who lives in PA. My 2 step-kids live here in AZ in the same town as us but that relationship has become strained with our opposite views on Covid. They would not help us in any way.
 
I appreciate all the comments. Thank you. I think our plans are on hold. This is not a good time to make such a drastic move. This is a disappointing decision for us but in another way, it's a relief. It wasn't just the packing and getting all that done that I was stressing about, it's the fact that I would have to do everything again. I would have to get all banking (SS and pensions) changed, truck registration and insurance (for both home and vehicle) and I'd have to get all utilities set up. I would have to schedule the moving company. I would have to research where we were going to live. Just everything.

We've moved so many times in the last 25 years that I don't think I have the energy to cope with it again....no matter how badly I want to be out of here. My husband is a dear man but he is absolutely no help with anything. It's always been left up to me to get it all straight.

So...thank you for not being discouraging. HUGS to all :)
 
Victor said:
I will always have mixed feelings about my decision...I went back against a promise to myself made in my youth.
The status quo is just that and I am not happy with it--are you? I can't get no satisfaction!
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Isn't it a shame we have to have such regrets about decisions we've made? I don't want to make another one. I have so many doubts now that we've been thinking about this, that I believe we just need to let it go and move on with our lives. We made a huge mistake 7 years ago and nothing is going to undo that mistake. No...I'm not happy with the status quo but I don't see how "going back" will fix it. I've never adapted to this place and probably never will but I'm here and I've got to quit living in the past and make my life better here. It's not easy, though...is it?
 
Oh Colleen, I hate the thought of you being unhappy for the next, possibly, 20+ years. Everything is doable if you just make a long list and take it one item at a time.

We were very nervous when we moved here. We didn't know a single person in this town, We had chosen Chillicothe because it was about half way between where my father and my son lived. So we looked at houses on line and a realtor was set to show us those houses plus a few others. We drove the two day trip from Georgia and looked at houses with her. We didn't like any of them, so we drove to another town that we remembered as "pretty" and bought a house there (here) that day.

{That house, while beautiful, was in the country and the big lot proved too much for us, so a few years later we bought this one on the edge of town. See? We made a mistake but as a wise man once told me, "Ain't nothing caint be fixed."}

We closed up things in Georgia and lined up a moving van. Drove two days to this town, went to closing, met the van as it arrived and they placed our furniture. We unpacked. Set up new bank accounts. Insurance was transferred...

We are so glad we did it. My son ended up living with us which was my goal (he has health problems) and he never would have moved to Georgia. Last year we all three became incapable of doing our own yard work so we hired the same company that does our neighbor's and wondered why we waited so long. It all works out.

Why not take a flight to the town of your choosing, stay in a hotel for a few days, and have a realtor show you a few places? No harm in looking around.
 
Ruthanne said:
All I can say is I wish you the best of luck with the move. I'm in Ohio and I've been here all of my life. I would just write down everything you need to do and take it step by step. It is possible. Others have done it, like @Buckeye Maybe he can give you some feedback, too.
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Yep - colleen, if you are not happy with your life where you are, and you are both up to the stress of selling/moving/buying, then go for it. I lived my whole life in Ohio until I retired ~13 years ago, and have moved from Ohio to Florida to Hawaii to Arizona back to Ohio and now back to Florida. I'm now 75 and would not rule out another move if there was a compelling reason for it.

Keep in mind that healthcare might be an issue in rural PA. Is that acceptable to you?
 
Coleen...come on back to Texas...lol.
There are many nice places to live around our area. Love Washington County, birthplace of The Republic of Texas...its about 45 minutes away from us - and we'd be happy to show you around. Life is good!
 
Pepper said:
Colleen, pick the place that would be the easiest and happiest place if you were alone. Sorry to sound morbid it's an awful thing to consider.
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I totally agree with this. It is indeed sad to think about but the reality is that most couples don't die on the same exact day as each other, so most likely one is going to be alone for a while. And in my case, what I would want for myself if I'm the last to die or go permanently into the nursing home is a comfortable little ground-floor apartment within walking distance of as many things as possible. In my case though, Huzz would like to be on even more acreage as far away from anything and anybody as possible since he thinks he's going to live as a 40-year-old forever; so this makes it hard for me to plan ahead. If you're lucky enough to have one of those rare husbands who will think ahead, I think Pepper is right: try to find as close a place as you can where you could at least be comfortable and content.
 
officerripley said:
I totally agree with this. It is indeed sad to think about but the reality is that most couples don't die on the same exact day as each other, so most likely one is going to be alone for a while. And in my case, what I would want for myself if I'm the last to die or go permanently into the nursing home is a comfortable little ground-floor apartment within walking distance of as many things as possible. In my case though, Huzz would like to be on even more acreage as far away from anything and anybody as possible since he thinks he's going to live as a 40-year-old forever; so this makes it hard for me to plan ahead. If you're lucky enough to have one of those rare husbands who will think ahead, I think Pepper is right: try to find as close a place as you can where you could at least be comfortable and content.
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I had to smile when I read your comments...especially the part about your husband wanting "room" and thinking he'll be 40 forever...:ROFLMAO:. He must be related to my husband. Seriously...we've never been on the same page about most things and this is a concern of mine more than ever now that this will probably be our "last" move to another home.
 
Colleen said:
I had to smile when I read your comments...especially the part about your husband wanting "room" and thinking he'll be 40 forever...:ROFLMAO:. He must be related to my husband. Seriously...we've never been on the same page about most things and this is a concern of mine more than ever now that this will probably be our "last" move to another home.
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Yep, more and more, talking to people both IRL and online, seems like most husbands are that way. Makes us who are married to guys like that members of a large club, sigh. I feel especially sorry for the wives who want to move to be near kids/grandkids so they can at least see those kids in person once in a great while and the husbands seem as if they couldn't care less whether they ever see the own kids or grandkids ever again. I know a lot of gals IRL in this situation and they are really sad about this. (And no, the old husbands aren't right when they say "those darn kids can come see us"; all or most of those "darn" kids are busy working their butts off to feed their kids & keep a roof overhead and while it's true it's better for the kids to drive, what these old guys need to do is agree to move closer to the kids and make it better for everybody. And if the old guys say "well, that wouldn't make it better for ME"; well, that's what getting old consists of, pal, giving more and more things up. Welcome to the party, pal!)
 
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Della said:
Oh Colleen, I hate the thought of you being unhappy for the next, possibly, 20+ years. Everything is doable if you just make a long list and take it one item at a time.

We were very nervous when we moved here. We didn't know a single person in this town, We had chosen Chillicothe because it was about half way between where my father and my son lived. So we looked at houses on line and a realtor was set to show us those houses plus a few others. We drove the two day trip from Georgia and looked at houses with her. We didn't like any of them, so we drove to another town that we remembered as "pretty" and bought a house there (here) that day.

{That house, while beautiful, was in the country and the big lot proved too much for us, so a few years later we bought this one on the edge of town. See? We made a mistake but as a wise man once told me, "Ain't nothing caint be fixed."}

We closed up things in Georgia and lined up a moving van. Drove two days to this town, went to closing, met the van as it arrived and they placed our furniture. We unpacked. Set up new bank accounts. Insurance was transferred...

We are so glad we did it. My son ended up living with us which was my goal (he has health problems) and he never would have moved to Georgia. Last year we all three became incapable of doing our own yard work so we hired the same company that does our neighbor's and wondered why we waited so long. It all works out.

Why not take a flight to the town of your choosing, stay in a hotel for a few days, and have a realtor show you a few places? No harm in looking around.
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Wish we only had a two day drive! Hopping on a plane isn't an option, either. People are too crazy these days. We use to fly a LOT but for the last 10 years, we've kept our feet on the ground.

I'm wavering from day to day. One day I think it would be much easier to just stay here and "live" with the place, but then the next day, I can't stop looking at houses online.....AAARRRGGGHHH. David will be released by his surgeon on Wednesday and he's done with PT, so, physically, he's good to go. I have too much time to debate with myself as we can't move until (maybe) March or so.

I have that long list and this isn't the first move we've made in our married lives so I know what the priorities are. It just seems so much more daunting than when I were younger :(
 
I was thinking, Colleen, about you not moving but going on trips. I have friends who are retired, and they own a townhome. They're always going on trips to different places and countries. That keeps them feeling invigorated and gives them an escape without them having to do all the changes that you wrote about. It's just a thought. Moving does not have to be permanent. It can be a trip or vacation.
 
palides2021 said:
I was thinking, Colleen, about you not moving but going on trips. I have friends who are retired, and they own a townhome. They're always going on trips to different places and countries. That keeps them feeling invigorated and gives them an escape without them having to do all the changes that you wrote about. It's just a thought. Moving does not have to be permanent. It can be a trip or vacation.
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A good idea as long as you can still drive safely.
 
officerripley said:
A good idea as long as you can still drive safely.
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My husband, who is 81, is an excellent driver, even at his age. When he was 13, he drove hay trucks and learned how to drive heavy equipment and tankers when he got older. When we retired, we sold our house and bought a 40' fifth-wheel and he'd back that thing in places you wouldn't believe. Those driving skills have stayed with him and he still has good reflexes. Most people that meet him think he's 70, not 81. He's not your typical "little old man".....haha. We traveled around (and lived in) in that fifth-wheel for 3 1/2 years and believe me we had some adventures. Diesel was a LOT cheaper then so it was affordable to do it. I think our traveling days are done. Too many angry people on the roads these days. We decided (if we move back east) that we'd split up the driving and make it an easier trip for both of us.
 


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