Dealing With Crap

TabbyAnn

TabbyAnn

Southern Indiana, U.S.A.
Location
Southern Indiana USA
I’m tired of dealing with the crap required to survive in today’s society. There seems to be no logic, integrity or customer service left in today’s institutions. I no longer want to deal with maintaining a home, garage, lawn, car, and doctors. All I want to do is eat, sleep and watch TV. But life won’t let you do that even after you’ve worked 40 years. Assisted living isn’t the answer.

After breaking my leg last year, I spent a week in a nursing home that advertised maid service, meal service, laundry service, and personal assistance. The food was horrible, they lost my laundry, and personal assistance was slow, rude or non-existent. I don’t want a permanent diet of that. I talk with others whose relatives have even worse experiences in nursing homes.
 

It can be overwhelming, but if you try to deal with one issue at a time it is doable. I had three large homes in my adult life until about 10 years ago. I then began an apartment life, and it was such a relief to let someone else deal with maintenance issues.
Perhaps you might ponder selling your home. Better days are coming, TabbyAnn. You've earned all the rest and relaxing days you need to be happy.
 
TabbyAnn, I've probably missed your living arrangement, but are you in a house or apartment, condo on your own? Assisted living is insanely expensive. I can only imagine the profit mills those places are. Senior apartments in your area? Senior van transport door to door?

Nursing homes need a big revamp. More staffing and nursing and administration who do their jobs and closely supervise those who work under them.
 

@TabbyAnn, sorry to hear. You know, I think we here all feel that way from time to time. I want to live, but sleep is my greatest pleasure. Doing the routine chores in life is just not the same, and seems like a struggle sometimes. But, I would hate assisted living or a nursing home, if it ever comes down to that they'll have to catch me and strap me to a gurney. Try to do something you love to do, that will feel so good.
 
Remy said:
TabbyAnn, I've probably missed your living arrangement, but are you in a house or apartment, condo on your own? Assisted living is insanely expensive. I can only imagine the profit mills those places are. Senior apartments in your area? Senior van transport door to door?

Nursing homes need a big revamp. More staffing and nursing and administration who do their jobs and closely supervise those who work under them.
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Same here...
 
TabbyAnn said:
I’m tired of dealing with the crap required to survive in today’s society. There seems to be no logic, integrity or customer service left in today’s institutions. I no longer want to deal with maintaining a home, garage, lawn, car, and doctors. All I want to do is eat, sleep and watch TV. But life won’t let you do that even after you’ve worked 40 years. Assisted living isn’t the answer. After breaking my leg last year, I spent a week in a nursing home that advertised maid service, meal service, laundry service, and personal assistance. The food was horrible, they lost my laundry, and personal assistance was slow, rude or non-existent. I don’t want a permanent diet of that. I talk with others whose relatives have even worse experiences in nursing homes.
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((tabbyAnne)).. come on over and be a roomie in my house... we can stick 2 fingers up to the world from here lol
 
TabbyAnn said:
I’m tired of dealing with the crap required to survive in today’s society. There seems to be no logic, integrity or customer service left in today’s institutions. I no longer want to deal with maintaining a home, garage, lawn, car, and doctors. All I want to do is eat, sleep and watch TV. But life won’t let you do that even after you’ve worked 40 years. Assisted living isn’t the answer. After breaking my leg last year, I spent a week in a nursing home that advertised maid service, meal service, laundry service, and personal assistance. The food was horrible, they lost my laundry, and personal assistance was slow, rude or non-existent. I don’t want a permanent diet of that. I talk with others whose relatives have even worse experiences in nursing homes.
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LOL - they're called "Rehabilitation Facilities."
Sounds better than calling them what they are - "Human Dumping Grounds"
 
I hear ya, Tabby; I am so sick and tired of housework, laundry, paying bills, balancing checkbooks I could scream sometimes. I worked 35 years at a job I disliked most of the time & hated some of the time and I'd love to be able to only have to worry about keeping myself and a tiny little apartment clean and just read & watch movies and be on the computer. But I'm stuck where I am and can do nothing about it but come here and vent. So anytime you want to vent, this is a good place, a lot of good, sympathetic listeners. Hugs.
 
I understand how you feel even though I'm not personally experiencing all of it. I have a friend who pretty much feels as you do about surviving today's society and all the crap that goes along with it. She honestly wishes she was born a couple of centuries ago. Modern technology and its devices drive her crazy. She and I have talked about these things and it hurts me to hear her stressing to the degree that she does and frankly I worry that it will eventually be detrimental to her health. She complains that companies don't do what they are supposed to when they are supposed to. It's almost impossible to get a human on the phone for customer service anymore (I can vouch for that). Thank God the ones I have wound up with were very efficient and pleasant, even if the process of finally being connected to them was annoying.

Life is not simple anymore it seems and dealing with things can be overwhelming. Sometimes I feel I have enough to do to keep up with my meds, eyedrops several times a day (without which I'd lose my vision) and mundane chores. But like you say...we can't escape these things. Do you have anything at all that brings you joy? What can you do to feel that you are pampering yourself? Can immersing yourself in your T.V. programs provide an escape? I know it does for me when I'm sad or bored and even just plain tired. I hope you find something that helps alleviate these feelings Tabby Ann! Don't slap me for saying this (don't mean to sound cliche`) but they do say that exercising helps by producing feel good endorphins. There are exercises on YouTube for seniors and disabled people too.
 
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I downsized to a 855 sq ft condo with a balcony. It’s made my life easier. The generation before me that I knew all lived in apartments so didn’t keep their homes.

Of the ones that didn’t become too ill or disabled they all kept doing all the normal stuff of life and tasks which helped keep them physically active. It sounds like you are depressed and and there’s various things to help you available.

Obviously none of this is helpful if you need assistance with daily tasks because of illness or disability. A good friend of mine moved into an assisted living apartment because he needed help due to Parkinson’s disease.

It allowed him to stay out of a nursing home. It was nice but very expensive. However, all facilities are short staffed so sometimes when he pushed the button for assistance it took a long time.
 
OneEyedDiva said:
She complains that companies don't do what they are supposed to when they are supposed to. It's almost impossible to get a human on the phone for customer service anymore (I can vouch for that).
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The lack of efficiency, logic, integrity and dignity in business and society outside the home add to the work of maintaining a home. I got an MRI last year and paid for it. This year I got letters from a collection agency for the bill. I called the MRI company to find out what’s going on and got a recording saying they went out of business at the end of 2022 and there’s no way to contact them.

A teenager ran into my car and the police report said it was his fault and his insurance company must pay for damages. I forwarded my bills to the at-fault insurance company 4 months ago and my bills haven’t been paid. When I contacted the company my call was forwarded to the adjuster managing my claim, and I got a recording saying she was out on short term disability.
 
When I had an accident I don’t deal with the other insurance company at all. You forward everything to your insurance company and they deal with it.

On the frustration side I have been trying to get an appointment with my eye doctor for 3 months. The scheduler never answers the phone or her message. Today I left her a message that said if I had to drive down there I will be talking to her boss.
 
Helps to understand & know the true meaning of corporate 'buzz' words. Downsize/rightsize, value added, bottom line, stock holders, middle management, all used on a daily basis in meetings. working for a company during my career I remember the wasted hours I spent listening to that tripe. My personal section's responsibility was helping our workforce (17,000 strong) with IT problems. In 2000 we had a team of 32 backing us, along with a dedicated 8 person help desk & 12+ more advanced tech support members.

Then came the twin towers in 2001. Next was the economic downturn in 2008, more adjustments to help the bottom line. We had to change our thinking & take on more responsibility with less help. We started with 80 under our cost center down to 4 24/7 when I decided to cut my ties & take retirement in 2009. We had evolved into a data center with 1,500 pieces of equipment to be responsible for & troubleshoot problems. It was ever changing but getting more help was not value added, so no help.

I felt I wasn't doing enough but my hands were tied. Lately when I've encountered problems be it computers, taxes, retail, financial help I would hear nothing but a recorded voice telling how important my call is to them. BS they refuse to staff their CS with enough experienced dependable help. Even some to answer a phone & help with a problem in English. Everything is outsourced or automated. Non-value added. It was all about money & nothing more!
 
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Good points about what those working in offices, help centers, etc. have to put up with also. A friend worked for years at reception for a medical practice with several doctors. The doctors always told the staff to never give a patient an "emergency" appointment, make 'em wait their turn, no exceptions; always charge patients for cancelled appointments not cancelled at least 2 working days in advance, no exceptions. But! The patients during an appointment would tell the doctor how the "mean" office staff was doing that and the doctors would always cave in and tell the patient not to worry about it, he'd tell the staff to make an exception but wouldn't of course. So because of the doctors not wanting to look like "the bad guy", their staff would be constantly getting harrassed in addition to their regular work.
 
Teacher Terry said:
When I had an accident I don’t deal with the other insurance company at all. You forward everything to your insurance company and they deal with it.
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I reported it to my insurance company first and my agent helped me file the claim with the at-fault company. My friends who've had recent accidents where the other driver was at fault tell me their company referred them to the at-fault company. I don't know how old your accident was but times change and companies change. And it depends upon whether you were at fault or the other driver.
 
I am sorry you are feeling this way. Life can sometimes be the pits. You do not say what your living arrangements are…or if you could possibly change them. But dealing with bureaucracy can test anybody’s patience. Maybe you should take a break and do what you wish…step sideways for a few days and treat yourself to a bit of “nothing”. It is a rare thing that must be dealt with right now. So do not.
 
Muskrat said:
Maybe you should take a break and do what you wish…step sideways for a few days and treat yourself to a bit of “nothing”. It is a rare thing that must be dealt with right now. So do not.
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I've done a lot of that lately but haven't found the situation where it's a rare to have to deal with things promptly. My electric company, gas company, phone company, water company, car insurance company, mortgage bank, state license bureau and lawn maintenance service all require prompt attention, not to mention my body which has become very demanding. I had my first commercial pedicure at 80 years old because I could no longer bend down to my nails due to a hip problem, and now that has to be done regularly to avoid ingrown nails. A filling fell out of my tooth this week and that needs to be repaired promptly. My car that was run over by a teenager is finished at the body shop and they would like to be paid promptly. I would love to turn my entire life over to someone else and walk away and do nothing.
 
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Thanks to every one of you for listening and commenting. It has helped.
I'm going to have a whiskey and coke now and shut up.
Someone posted on Facebook that if you stop drinking soda and alcohol it could add ten years to your life.
I thought oh no, I can't stand 10 more years, that calls for a whiskey and coke immediately. FLOWERS-4.jpg
 
My little trick on some of those bills is to keep a credit balance. Not everyone can do that…but I can. When I was much younger I was in an out of control marriage with debt and distress. As a result I can not abide the stress of perhaps not being prompt with bills. So I pay ahead. I keep a credit balance on all my utilities, hoa’s ect. When I had a mortgage I kept about three months ahead. This is a HUGE stress reducer for me.
 

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