Doctors' Benevolence: Expected, Implied, or Misconstrued?

I

imp

Senior Member
Mostly, doctors express that I ask too many questions. Two drs. back, the guy admonished me! I won't be seeing him anymore. Here's my thread point. Our friend in Indiana, Vonda, 75, two years older than I, always pretty healthy, gets around easily, no arthritis, some respiratory failings from smoking all her life, but she keeps up with us for the most part. Thin, no overweight, pretty, smart, witty.

Last Winter, she and Gary, her husband, spent the worst part, weather-wise in Gulf Shores, Alabama. She had stomach distress and pain on and off all winter there, whether doctored or not, unknown. Last spring, she started seeing her regular Dr., in IN. His diagnoses began with IBS, acid reflux, others. Specialist decided gall bladder trouble, surgery removed it, following weeks she became sick as hell. Started losing weight, could not eat.

Second surgery: cysts on kidneys, some other things unintelligible to the layman. Several scans and X-rays before and after these surgeries were "negative"-- (with "cysts"??). About two months ago, an abdominal aortic aneurism was mentioned. Still no decision on treatment. The lady has lost more weight, went from about 150 down to, now, 104 pounds. She looks awful. Still high-spirited, but fear is obvious in her eyes and manner.

My opinion? The gall bladder surgery was somehow botched. Someone knew it, covered it with new diagnoses, maybe all the doctors involved are now hoping that an old lady whose time is due, will quietly croak. No definitive direction of treatment has been plotted. Endless diagnostic tests, resolving nothing except the balance sheets.

Am I out of line? What guidance can I give our poor friend? Maybe I'm wrong. Her situation highlights my own medical aura of distrust.

Thanks for reading, and considering. I may suffer for this one, I know. But, I won't back down easily, given all the evidence present. imp
 

Seen the medical cover up as I have cover ups in the workplace, a store, by a contractor etc. The frustrating thing with medical "professionals" is they are frequently are not. They might have some skill and experience but they are not the total package. Surgeons like to operate, even if unnecessary why buck their comrades. But many "professionals" will not buck their colleagues. Getting opinions on some hardcore contract work now and they insist on knowing the precise name of who was out here-why. Either their way is a good or reasonable idea or it sucks. Instead-a whishy washy it's not a bad deal.

Decades ago in the age of doctor gods interns and nurses flatout told us that a patient's lung was punctured by a catheter which delayed treatment and weakend the patient. That same anesthesiologist was the first to bill after the patient passed. The actual surgeon lectured us with impolite use of his hand and fingers pointing at us(the closest I EVER came to becoming a criminal with a record including assault or attempted murder) as he reminded us about the waiver that was signed. Family was old school don't sue even though people in legal & medical industry told us it would've been a slam dunk. The hospital & staff had boasted they're the best, leaders in their field blah, blah(every doctor seems to be "the best"). To this day I still check the internet on occassion along with all the fund raising literature from the hospital touting their recent awards, breakthroughs and staff resumes-those doctors never won or did squat nationwide. I can't even get their name on internet searches half the time.

People pay big bucks expect big results. Pain, suffering or death is not a big result.
 
A Doctor's "Qualities"

Medical schools turn out degreed doctors. Some manage to squeak through, some middle-of-thje-road, academically, a few excel book-wise. Highest grades do not imply greatest skill, though. A large part of a physician's effectivreness hinges on his/her "people abilities", understanding the vital importance of listening very closely to the patient, not only the responses to the doctor's questions, but also opinions and feelings stated by the patient.

A surgeon having great skill in managing the "cutting" effectively, might not necessarily be a "great doctor", in many cases the rapport with the patient before and after the surgery reveals that. We saw it happen with my wife's mother's surgeon who botched (we feel) the hip replacement, cracking her femur unknowingly, then closing, which resulted in several weeks of excruciating pain and concern. The hairline crack revealed after the surgery necessitated ripping out the prosthesis, and doing the job over, after adequate healing of the bone occurred. The 2nd. surgery was fairly successful; the old woman was able to walk pain-free again; unfortunately, several months later she took a fall at home, and broke the other "good" hip. Same surgeon replaced that one, revealed a coarse, gruff manner in dealing with family members. He did not reveal then, however, that all three hip surgeries he had performed while being aware he had a terminal malignancy, and he died about a year later. imp
 

imp said:
Last Winter, she and Gary, her husband, spent the worst part, weather-wise in Gulf Shores, Alabama. She had stomach distress and pain on and off all winter there, whether doctored or not, unknown. Last spring, she started seeing her regular Dr., in IN. His diagnoses began with IBS, acid reflux, others. Specialist decided gall bladder trouble, surgery removed it, following weeks she became sick as hell. Started losing weight, could not eat.

Second surgery: cysts on kidneys, some other things unintelligible to the layman. Several scans and X-rays before and after these surgeries were "negative"-- (with "cysts"??). About two months ago, an abdominal aortic aneurism was mentioned. Still no decision on treatment. The lady has lost more weight, went from about 150 down to, now, 104 pounds. She looks awful. Still high-spirited, but fear is obvious in her eyes and manner.

My opinion? The gall bladder surgery was somehow botched. Someone knew it, covered it with new diagnoses, maybe all the doctors involved are now hoping that an old lady whose time is due, will quietly croak. No definitive direction of treatment has been plotted. Endless diagnostic tests, resolving nothing except the balance sheets.
Click to expand...

(quote: Butterfly) "Why did she go back to that same surgeon if she believed he botched the first surgery? I would not have."

We don't know if it was the same surgeon. Vonda has not been on-line now for about a week, previous to that, my wife spoke to her, she seemed optimistic then, did not mention further doctor plans, though her weight had fallen to under one-hundred pounds. This morning her daughter posted on Facebook, Vonda is again in the hospital, "critical, surgery scheduled today. Bleeding somewhere, blood transfusion."

That is all we presently know. It certainly "hits home" when we consider that this vibrant, fun, out-going lady who loved so much to come out here to be with us, and peruse the casino haunts, could so unfortunately be reduced to near-death with little concrete identifiable reason. I am rarely this sad. The anger preceded it, as it usually does. imp
 
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