Flowers on Grave in Trash

[debodun]

I put an artificial arrangement on my parents gravesite every spring. I had to go downtown today and thought I'd retreive it before winter. When I got there, I didn't see it. I was going to leave figuring I'd have to replace it next year when my eyes fell on a barrel trash can. I went over and looked in it and sure ebough, there was my bouquet. I fished it out and brushed it off, but it left me wondering who would do that. My thoughts rest on the caretaker.

 

[Murrmurr]

Probably was the caretaker, thinking of winter coming. Same thoughts as you, but he beat you to it. He knows that most graves site visitors just set it and forget it, and don't think about how the weather effects a cemetery.

 

[debodun]

I usually leave it a little before Memorial Day (end of May) and remove it just after July 4th, but I got sidetracked this summer with helth problems.

 

[Aunt Mavis]

I go to my 3 sister’s graves once a week. (The twin’s marker is brand new) I make sure the three flags are in order (American, Finnish and Norwegian) and the light will shine bright at night. I also do a general cleanup of their neighbors if I see something out of place. Right now the Canadian Geese are crapping everywhere. Boo.

 

[shedevil7953]

I put an artificial arrangement on my parents gravesite every spring. I had to go downtown today and thought I'd retreive it before winter. When I got there, I didn't see it. I was going to leave figuring I'd have to replace it next year when my eyes fell on a barrel trash can. I went over and looked in it and sure ebough, there was my bouquet. I fished it out and brushed it off, but it left me wondering who would do that. My thoughts rest on the caretaker.

That's horrible, even if the caretaker was thinking about the winter.

 

[Knight]

Before condemning the caretaker reading what they are responsible for might help.

https://climbtheladder.com/cemetery-caretaker/

Do we know the condition of the bouquet? Was there any communication between Deb & the cemetery staff about the usual annual removal? Does Deb remove the bouquet refresh how it looks & use again or replace it?

The sentiment of placing a bouquet on her parents grave is really nice. I think most would contact cemetery management then post here for opinions if removal was intentional to inflict emotional harm.

 

[LadyEmeraude]

I have both family and friends laid to rest between two cemeteries.

One allows artificial flowers arrangements to stay a month or so,
and if much longer it goes in the bin.

The other cemetery does not allow artificial arrangements at all, only
fresh ...

I know that the placement of artificial flowers varies from cemetery
to cemetery and that there are rules.

 

[Buckeye]

I'm a thousand miles or so from the various cemeteries the contain my families, but I think it is standard procedure for the caretakers to remove all the plastic flowers in the fall. I know I've seen signs advising about it.

Can I kindly suggest that you throw away the old, and surely faded, flowers and buy fresh ones next spring?

 

[chic]

It's not the caretaker where I live, but the cemetery staff who determine whose floral tributes go and when. They post notices for us with dates when flowers will be removed from graves so we'll know in case there is something we want to save, to remove it before the date they have posted.

 

[DebraMae]

Where my parents are artificial flowers aren't allowed at all. Fresh flowers can be placed but only on certain dates, such as Mother's Day, Christmas, etc. All headstones are ground level and this facilitates mowing.

Where my grandparents are is a much older cemetery. They have what they call "Decoration Day" every weekend before Mother's Day. Most of the flowers on that date are actually planted. They have no rules regarding artificial flowers, it is just customary to plant flowers on Decoration Day. The caretakers do come through prior to that weekend and remove and dispose of any artificial arrangements.

 

[Lewkat]

The cemetery where my daughter-in-law and her mother are buried is never closed. They are buried together with a shared tombstone, as both died very young. It is right next to the roadway, and while visiting one day, there were a few people walking their dogs among the graves. I stood there waiting for them to pass, appalled at seeing the owners allowing the animals to relieve themselves on the graves. As they came abreast of Kelly's grave, I waved them off the area and told them to go over into the tree area. Quite miffed, they did so. I complained to the caretaker and he just shrugged. My son sent a formal letter of complaint to the church and the See that owns the cemetery. Nothing ever came of it.

 

[fuzzybuddy]

I can see the need to limit how long artificial wreaths can stay over a grave. Can you imagine what the cemetery would look like if they never policed the graves?