Have You Written or Would You Write Your Own Obituary?

OneEyedDiva

OneEyedDiva

SF VIP
Location
New Jersey
I am planning to write mine. I've had to write four in my lifetime (father, mother, aunt, husband) while I was grieving. Trying to honor their lives and accomplishments, especially with not having all the information at my fingertips, was one of the hardest things I've had to do. I don't want my son to have to go through that. I know there's several things I've done that he may not remember or even know about. Also I've read obituaries and though who the hell wrote that mess?! My husband and I said we were going to write ours years ago. I wish we had finished his because when he died receiving input or not receiving the input desired from his children during the short time his obit was to be ready to go to the printer (48 hours over the Christmas holiday when the printer was actually closed), was horribly stressful for me.

I'm thinking it's time I stop thinking about it and do it. I did start a draft years ago but it is very thin. Have you written or thought about writing your own obituary?
 

No, is my idea OneEyedDiva, for me, it would be
wrong,I would probably just put negatives down
and leave out the good stuff, in case they thought
that I was being big headed and boastful.

You could leave a diary or a list of good and bad
things, for your chosen heir, who will be writing the
obituary, just bit and pieces, from across the years.

Mike.
 
I wrote mine in 2020, right after my younger brother passed away. My older sister and younger sister, were arguing over what should be in my brother's obituary. My elder sister who wants things her way, thought that her idea was the best. So I wrote mine, and gave it to my younger sister.
 
Other than a few words to say when I arrived and left and perhaps indirectly the reason if cared for by a specific medical group who deserve the thanks. My husband and children will be mentioned.

Lately so many people are barely putting that much in. Sometimes it’s just a name and dates.
 
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I think people doing genealogy research would appreciate it if the obituary mentioned things like the year and where the person was born, the county they died in, and how many siblings they had, the names of children and immediate family that predeceased them or are still alive, etc. Also the current location (city/state) of the people who are still alive. I personally like to read what a person died from, but it seems like that info is almost always left out and just has to be guessed by what charity they would like donations given to.

Yesterday I was watching a YouTube that said that this past week the billionaire Warren Buffett gave life-advice at the shareholders meeting that people should write the obituary they would like to have - and then live their life to make it true.
 
Might be a good idea. I wrote my husband's right after he died of complications of dementia and was still mad because of the beatings he gave me before going to nursing home. It was during the pandemic and I couldn't get any help in getting him out of the house until a medical emergency. I didn't name the step-grandchildren because they were not close to him. I did not embellish, only state facts. Also SHOCKED at the cost for our major newspaper.
 
Yes, I have written mine 😊

My husband and I also discussed what we would want on our headstones.

My husband said his should read
“He came, He tried, He left” 🤣

I said I would simply want
”She was a devoted wife
and a happy mother of children“

💕
 
I've written more than one obit. I don't plan on writing my own. If someone else would like to say a few words, fine. If not, that's fine, too.
 
When it comes to writing about yourself, remember the words of the great bard, Robert Burns...

“O, wad some Power the giftie gie us
To see oursels as others see us!
It wad frae monie a blunder free us,
An' foolish notion.”​

 

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