jujube
SF VIP
Here are a few holiday riddles to throw out at your Thanksgiving table....at least until someone tells you to shut up:
When does Christmas come BEFORE Thanksgiving?
In the dictionary.
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Which side of the Turkey has more feathers?
The outside.
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Why didn't the cook season the turkey stuffing?
He didn't have thyme.
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What should you say when your family begs you to stop making Thanksgiving jokes?
"I can't quit cold turkey!"
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If you feel scared on Halloween and jolly on Christmas, how do you feel on Thanksgiving?
Stuffed.
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Where do you find a turkey with no legs?
Exactly where you left it.
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Why did they let the turkey join the Thanksgiving band?
He had the drumsticks.
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Where do turkeys go to dance?
The Butter Ball.
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Why don't people eat fish on Thanksgiving?
Because Thanksgiving is always on a Thursday, not a Fry-Day.
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What should you drink if you are sad on Thanksgiving?
Apple sigh-der.
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What smells the best during Thanksgiving dinner?
Your nose.
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If April showers bring May flowers, what do May Flowers bring?
The Pilgrims.
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What's the best thing to put in a pumpkin pie?
Your teeth.
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What do mathematicians have for dessert at Thanksgiving dinner?
Pumpkin pi.
*****
What would you get if you cross a turkey with a ghost?
A poultrygeist.
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Why did the turkey get in trouble?
He was using fowl language.
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What do you get when you cross a turkey with a banjo?
A turkey that can pluck itself.
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What happened to the turkey who got in a fight?
He got the stuffing knocked out of him.
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What did the turkey mother say to her disobedient chicks?
If your father could see you right now, he'd turn over in his gravy.
*****
When does Christmas come BEFORE Thanksgiving?
In the dictionary.
*****
Which side of the Turkey has more feathers?
The outside.
*****
Why didn't the cook season the turkey stuffing?
He didn't have thyme.
*****
What should you say when your family begs you to stop making Thanksgiving jokes?
"I can't quit cold turkey!"
*****
If you feel scared on Halloween and jolly on Christmas, how do you feel on Thanksgiving?
Stuffed.
*****
Where do you find a turkey with no legs?
Exactly where you left it.
*****
Why did they let the turkey join the Thanksgiving band?
He had the drumsticks.
*****
Where do turkeys go to dance?
The Butter Ball.
*****
Why don't people eat fish on Thanksgiving?
Because Thanksgiving is always on a Thursday, not a Fry-Day.
*****
What should you drink if you are sad on Thanksgiving?
Apple sigh-der.
*****
What smells the best during Thanksgiving dinner?
Your nose.
*****
If April showers bring May flowers, what do May Flowers bring?
The Pilgrims.
*****
What's the best thing to put in a pumpkin pie?
Your teeth.
*****
What do mathematicians have for dessert at Thanksgiving dinner?
Pumpkin pi.
*****
What would you get if you cross a turkey with a ghost?
A poultrygeist.
*****
Why did the turkey get in trouble?
He was using fowl language.
*****
What do you get when you cross a turkey with a banjo?
A turkey that can pluck itself.
*****
What happened to the turkey who got in a fight?
He got the stuffing knocked out of him.
*****
What did the turkey mother say to her disobedient chicks?
If your father could see you right now, he'd turn over in his gravy.
*****
