At the end of 2021, I bought a house halfway across the country, after having been a renter for decades. I’d owned a small mobile home, sold it and used the proceeds ($30k) as the down payment. I live on social security, but can afford to do so in my new state. Owning a home that I bought all by myself still makes me pinch myself to see if it’s real.
The mortage (PITI) costs me less each month than the space rent did on the mobile home I owned. The thing I know will be a problem is the lack of money for certain maintenance things (rain gutters for example). I do have a bit of savings (under $40k) from a 401K that I rolled over, but I’m keeping that for future potential big ticket items. My brother and wife also moved to the same place I now live.
They were lucky and sold their house that was free & clear for over $1.3M and also inherited her mother’s estate, with a house, also free & clear, that cleared $1.4M, as well as investments And a pension. So, to say they’re rolling in dough is an understatement, in my mind. They spend freely on things for their new house.
The sore spot that prompts this post is my brother, while perhaps meaning well, says to me that he’s getting new leaf guards on his house, and upgrading the furnace/AC. (I’m using this as an example as it’s been a continual thing for past year or two…) He then says I should get new gutters. Mine are original to the 1964 house and have some rust and leak issues at downspouts. I told him I’d had an estimate, and can’t do it right now. He asks why.
He and wife both know my financial situation very well, and yet my brother will still ask me why I’m not doing this or that maintenance thing. I tell him I don’t have the money. I get the impression from his comments that he just doesn’t understand. He and wife never had kids, both worked, they kept to themselves. I raised 3 kids by myself, self-employed. I don’t have the savings they do, but I feel very fortunate, truly lucky, to be where I am today, in my early 70s. How do I get myself to just “let it go” when he says things like he does… clearly with no comprehension of a person not able to spend freely.
The mortage (PITI) costs me less each month than the space rent did on the mobile home I owned. The thing I know will be a problem is the lack of money for certain maintenance things (rain gutters for example). I do have a bit of savings (under $40k) from a 401K that I rolled over, but I’m keeping that for future potential big ticket items. My brother and wife also moved to the same place I now live.
They were lucky and sold their house that was free & clear for over $1.3M and also inherited her mother’s estate, with a house, also free & clear, that cleared $1.4M, as well as investments And a pension. So, to say they’re rolling in dough is an understatement, in my mind. They spend freely on things for their new house.
The sore spot that prompts this post is my brother, while perhaps meaning well, says to me that he’s getting new leaf guards on his house, and upgrading the furnace/AC. (I’m using this as an example as it’s been a continual thing for past year or two…) He then says I should get new gutters. Mine are original to the 1964 house and have some rust and leak issues at downspouts. I told him I’d had an estimate, and can’t do it right now. He asks why.
He and wife both know my financial situation very well, and yet my brother will still ask me why I’m not doing this or that maintenance thing. I tell him I don’t have the money. I get the impression from his comments that he just doesn’t understand. He and wife never had kids, both worked, they kept to themselves. I raised 3 kids by myself, self-employed. I don’t have the savings they do, but I feel very fortunate, truly lucky, to be where I am today, in my early 70s. How do I get myself to just “let it go” when he says things like he does… clearly with no comprehension of a person not able to spend freely.
