How worried should you be about dumb mistakes?

M

Melissa

New Member
Everyone makes mistakes. As a reasonably intelligent person who is considered sensible and capable, I find myself very anxious when I screw up. At 69, and while watching elderly parents fail, I wonder if I'm losing it any time I do something questionable. Here's what happened today: I went to pick up a cake at the baker's house. I know where she lives, but I've never been there before. The house is on a big farm lot. I'm supposed to pull in, go to the back porch and pick up the cake. When I get there everything is snow covered. I pull in where I think the drive is, get the cake, get back in the vehicle. I then realize the drive entrance was somewhere else and I have driven up through the yard. Not paying attention? Could happen to anyone? Sign of dementia? No damage done here, by the way, and the owners were very gracious. But I am really embarrassed. This incident is fairly isolated, but I've done other things that worry me in recent months. How about you?
 

I also say NO to signs of dementia here. I believe you were new to this place, the conditions were not the best at all with snow all over the ground, and you also stated it was a very large farm. I do not consider myself having any signs of dementia, but I would have also been completely lost and I also think many people would have been as well no matter the age of the person.
 
it can be a moment of asking how could i do that ... but not worth fretting over most likely you are the only one who barely noticed.

I have an issue with my husband ... tell him where places are .. alert him to avoid certain traffic issues or best route location of best entrance etc. he almost insists on doing the opposite. Then it is STILL my fault.
We went to a farm type setting and the turn in was next to another one i will say remember it is the second one not the first and well......the other lane is exit only busy day was a fiasco backing out and correcting.....
getting to be where i do not want to go with him anymore. let him embarrass himself.
 
Melissa said:
Everyone makes mistakes. As a reasonably intelligent person who is considered sensible and capable, I find myself very anxious when I screw up. At 69, and while watching elderly parents fail, I wonder if I'm losing it any time I do something questionable. Here's what happened today: I went to pick up a cake at the baker's house. I know where she lives, but I've never been there before. The house is on a big farm lot. I'm supposed to pull in, go to the back porch and pick up the cake. When I get there everything is snow covered. I pull in where I think the drive is, get the cake, get back in the vehicle. I then realize the drive entrance was somewhere else and I have driven up through the yard. Not paying attention? Could happen to anyone? Sign of dementia? No damage done here, by the way, and the owners were very gracious. But I am really embarrassed. This incident is fairly isolated, but I've done other things that worry me in recent months. How about you?
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Please don't overthink this or make too much of it. It's very easy, especially in places you are not living in every day. When the ground is snow covered, it extremely easy to get off track. I've become very disoriented when walking a path trail in an open area park that I took almost every day with my dog. After a snow storm, there was no visible path and no tracks to follow. There were trees all around, but I walked waaaay out of the way in deep snow because I couldn't identify the ones that lined the trail. Same thing with driving when snow is concerned.

I'm 68 and I do things that worry me all the time. I lost my aunt to Alzheimer's years ago, and I always fear I may go down the same road. I try not amplify things that I may do, they usually are minor and I usually catch them pretty quickly. I've made it a point to mark that path and the trees lining it in my mind, so next time I'll do better. Don't be embarrassed and don't beat yourself up. We're getting older, but we need to keep some sense of confidence in ourselves, or we lose. You're fine, and welcome to the forum. 💛
 
You're perfectly normal.
It's a good thing there wasn't a ditch under that snow.

This is the scenario if you had dementia:
"What day is today? And, what was I suppose to do? Why are my keys laying on top of that purse? Whose purse is that? Are those house keys or car keys? Somebody parked in my driveway. Is that my car? Who' calling me? Where's my phone?"

And you know, things may slip through the cracks but just say, "Oh well". And smile.
You'll still make it through the day. And I'll bet the baker would bring the cake later.

Tom Rush 😊
 
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I'm not worried. I used to maintain a tight schedule when I was working, with meetings, conference calls, etc. I think it is just that I need a break from all the mental olympics.

I went to get a massage today and they told me I was a day early. I think I just entered the wrong day in my calendar. I needed two new rear tires on my car so instead I spent an hour at Firestone. I will get my massage tomorrow. The joys of being retired. (y)
 
A few days ago I had lunch (outdoors) with four women, all a bit older than me (70-80). One I knew very well, the others I just met that day.

We all laughed about the foibles of growing older. My occasional inability to retrieve a word and moments of forgetfulness appear to be no better and no worse than any of theirs. This forum is also very reassuring on that front.

@Melissa, please don't beat yourself up over being unable to correctly locate an unplowed driveway on a farm that wasn't familiar to you. Instead of asking yourself, "How could I have missed that driveway?" I recommend you ask, "How could I have found that driveway?"
 

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