I Learned a Lesson about Old Friends

bodumene

bodumene

New Member
I don't remember what triggered off my thinking of a certain time in my life when I was young. My family would go on vacation all summer (my parents were teachers) to the same place each year. I had a group of very close friends there whose families also came each year. We would have a grand, old time, swimming, boating, playing ball, square dancing at night.

Anyway, whatever made me think of that time made me want to re-connect with my old friends. I found one on the internet, and called him.

He was totally not interested, even seemed a little put off by my phone call. It was very disappointing.

I asked a few of my current friends if they would like hearing from childhood friends, and most said no. They said the past was in the past, and they probably would not have much in common with childhood friends anymore.

So I guess I learned a lesson about old friends. What do you think? Would you have liked to be called by a childhood friend?
 

Personally I wouldn't like it at all, I've moved far away from my childhood home, have no family or contacts from that time and no interest in dragging up the past

If you want to try again bodumene, you may have more luck on the Friends Reunited website, that is specifically for old friends who wish to reconnect
 
there's also Classmates for those who want to reconnect with old school friends, but I don't join, as I moved way across the country. And I'm sure Facebook is another place one can take a chance. But personally, I haven't tried to contact anyone, although I have googled some and learned of their fates, some dead, some still very much alive and thriving.
 

bodumene said:
I don't remember what triggered off my thinking of a certain time in my life when I was young. My family would go on vacation all summer (my parents were teachers) to the same place each year. I had a group of very close friends there whose families also came each year. We would have a grand, old time, swimming, boating, playing ball, square dancing at night.

Anyway, whatever made me think of that time made me want to re-connect with my old friends. I found one on the internet, and called him.

He was totally not interested, even seemed a little put off by my phone call. It was very disappointing.

I asked a few of my current friends if they would like hearing from childhood friends, and most said no. They said the past was in the past, and they probably would not have much in common with childhood friends anymore.

So I guess I learned a lesson about old friends. What do you think? Would you have liked to be called by a childhood friend?
Click to expand...

That's a shame, I can understand the disappointment. I would not mind hearing from someone that I felt close to during childhood but more than a call, I don't know. It would depend on a lot of things. I've only been to one h.s. reunion, that was enough. It was more like "look how successful I've become". A lot of people reconnect on Facebook, I understand.
 
I stay in contact with an old friend from my old childhood neighborhood. We don't talk on a regular basis, but when we do get the chance to talk, it's like no time has passed. Always find things to talk about and the conversation is never boring.
 
As far as high school goes I had very few folks I remember fondly. But maybe a handful of people would be fun to see again.
BTW I looked up Friends Reunited for fun and the site has been shut down.
 
Probably not. I've met two of the people I went to HS with, and on both occasions it didn't turn out very well. In both cases it was uncomfortable, and in one case it bordered on scary and came very close to stalking. Just because you connected deeply with someone when you were both 13 doesn't mean you still have anything in common.
 
I would feel pretty uncomfortable to be contacted by someone from that long ago. It might be meaningful for some, but I would feel it was an intrusion on my privacy and would wonder, why me and why now?
 
I would like to hear from a few of my old friends. I do wonder if we would have anything in common though. I did hear from one a few years after I was married. By then I had two kids,she had none,by choice. Her life was filled with sports,whatever was in season at the time. You name it, she played it.I had absolutely no interest in sports and she had no interest in kids. Amazing how in a few years people and their interests change.
 
bodumene said:
I don't remember what triggered off my thinking of a certain time in my life when I was young. My family would go on vacation all summer (my parents were teachers) to the same place each year. I had a group of very close friends there whose families also came each year. We would have a grand, old time, swimming, boating, playing ball, square dancing at night.

Anyway, whatever made me think of that time made me want to re-connect with my old friends. I found one on the internet, and called him.

He was totally not interested, even seemed a little put off by my phone call. It was very disappointing.

I asked a few of my current friends if they would like hearing from childhood friends, and most said no. They said the past was in the past, and they probably would not have much in common with childhood friends anymore.

So I guess I learned a lesson about old friends. What do you think? Would you have liked to be called by a childhood friend?
Click to expand...

That's too bad Ruth but maybe you caught him at a bad moment? I wouldn't call an old friend but I've reconnected with tons of old school friends through facebook. I think that's the safest way to do it. :eek:
 
More of a feminine thing I think, as men generally are absorbed in themselves and their buddies at the moment...
 
I found two of my old friends (wedding party) and even visited them out of state.

One was my best man and we had a great time revisiting old memories..We talk a lot and the phone and he even came down to Texas for a visit.

The other friend had a good visit when we where there, but other than that visit (3 years ago) we seldom talk.

I had not seen or heard from them,prior to then, in over 50 years!!!
 
I love being called by old friends. One of the best things about traveling all over the country for the past seven summers is that I get to look up old friends and distant relatives. Mostly it's been great. Occasionally, it's been fantastic. Lots of "remember when..." and "can you believe we did that....."

We spent last summer here in North Carolina, about 45 minutes away from one of my very best friends in high school. We never had any falling out or anything, just drifted away over the years as people tend to do but occasionally passed greetings on Facebook. I called her last year, early in the summer and said I'd love to drive over and see her. I got a lukewarm response with an "I'll give you a call." I contacted her a couple of times more by Facebook and got the same response. She never set a date to get together so I had to accept she didn't want to. I didn't even try this year.
 
I still live in the same small town where I grew up in. Every now and then I'll run into somebody from back in the day. I do enjoy that, have a little conversation and catch up with each other, share some old war stories.

I guess there's always someone you wonder about how they came out in life, and maybe would like to see again. But I've never looked anyone up or have a Facebook account.
 
I would love to be contacted by old friends. It would mean they cared enough to find me. One of the things I have found when reconnecting with them, is that we no longer are in the same head space. We might still care about each other, but there wasn't enough remaining to reignite the friendship. What's saddened me about the female friends I knew is that they gave up who they were to be what their husbands wanted them to be. Some of them turned to alcohol and drugs, and are not really themselves because of their dependencies. And they live in denial as to what it's done/is doing to them. What I've had to do is with each growth step I've made is find people who were in similar spaces. At this age that can be harder, especially in the boonies. So cultivating my inner-self is what I'm doing.
 
I have no interest either in reconnecting with childhood friends. I feel, as others have already said, that I've moved on and away from that time. I went to one HS reunion--the 10th in 1975. Of a class of 400 I would have loved to meet up with four or five friends that had moved away soon after high school. None of them were there. Recently I connected with a college roommate but our interests and activities are so different we have nothing in common now.
 
A friend is a blessing at any time.

Some friends are just for a season, or for the good times. But if you have one who stands by you through life, and/or when times get hard, then you have been doubly blessed.
 

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