Mainly for those stuffer.ing through these holidays 😔🤗💔

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Ruthanne

Ruthanne

Caregiver
Location
Midwest
Am I alone in feeling that I wish we could skip the holidays this year? I'd rather go straight to New years day.

Having lost my fur baby this year is one of the reasons I feel like this. Also my parents are gone as well as other relatives. It just won't be the same this year without Suzy.

Holidays haven't been right since my parents passed many years ago. I'm totally alone now in this world 🌍. All of my remaining siblings live out of state and never come here for the holidays.


Edit: This is mostly for those who are suffering this season.

So I will just have to tolerate the hoopla on tv.

How about you to those suffering?
 

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Ruthanne said:
I'm totally alone now in this world 🌍. All of my remaining siblings live out of state and never come here for the holidays.
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You have siblings, so you are really not totally alone, right?

Any chance you can go visit them?


Personally I love the holidays, and look forward to the special events, the traditions, the lights, the joy people have.
We still host the turkey feast for whoever wants to come... this year DH and I have 7 guests confirmed, with a possible 6 more.
Our kids come home for the week between Christmas and New Years, and so do the grandkids.
 
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I would be glad to skip them, Ruthanne. I remember some past holidays (let's say Thanksgiving) that I spent alone but still watched the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade, cooked myself a Thanksgiving dinner, and tried making the most of the day. Then, on another year, I totally ignored the holiday, having something like Mexican food and watching a funny movie. That wasn't great either, but it was easier on me and kept me from dwelling on the past.

Being alone on a holiday is not what we choose, but when or if it happens, we can dispense with traditional observances if we wish. I'm not trying to minimize how you feel, and I know it's not the ideal solution - but what we're talking about here are only 2 days of the year - Thanksgiving and Christmas. They will pass.
 
I've no doubt I'll be like I have been for several years now. Totally disinterested until the week before then all of a sudden "IT'S CHRIIIIIISTMAAAAAAS!" especially if the likkle grandchildren are revving up and excited! Grandad will perform :love:
 
That Lady in PA said:
You have siblings, so you are really not totally alone, right?

Any chance you can go visit them?


Personally I love the holidays, and look forward to the special events, the traditions, the lights, the joy people have.
We still host the turkey feast for whoever wants to come... this year DH and I have 7 guests confirmed, with a possible 6 more.
Our kids come home for the week between Christmas and New Years, and so do the grandkids.
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Yes I am totally alone in my apartment. My siblings do nothing for me on the holidays anymore.

You have family who visits you and your significant other so of course you are happy this time of year.


My post was mainly meant for those who are like me sorry.
 
MACKTEXAS said:
I would be glad to skip them, Ruthanne. I remember some past holidays (let's say Thanksgiving) that I spent alone but still watched the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade, cooked myself a Thanksgiving dinner, and tried making the most of the day. Then, on another year, I totally ignored the holiday, having something like Mexican food and watching a funny movie. That wasn't great either, but it was easier on me and kept me from dwelling on the past.

Being alone on a holiday is not what we choose, but when or if it happens, we can dispense with traditional observances if we wish. I'm not trying to minimize how you feel, and I know it's not the ideal solution - but what we're talking about here are only 2 days of the year - Thanksgiving and Christmas. They will pass.
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Actually I am talking about 2 months of suffering my sister's taking her life years ago near Christmas. Then my very best friend passed away this year and so the holidays stink for me. It's tons of feeling very sad and alone too.
 
I’m good.

I could do without the commercial side of Christmas but I try not to begrudge others.

I’ve observed the holidays alone for the last fifteen years and I’m ok with it.

I always get myself a few treats, prepare a few memory foods, and I look forward to the ghosts of Christmas past that always pay me a visit.

Like so many things in life, Christmas is what we choose to make it.
 
Ruthanne said:
Actually I am talking about 2 months of suffering my sister's taking her life years ago near Christmas. Then my very best friend passed away this year and so the holidays stink for me. It's tons of feeling very sad and alone too.
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Ruthanne said:
I'm sorry I started this thread. I should have known how it would turn out
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None of us know all the burdens other people carry. I was simply replying to your question in the opening post where you wrote, "How about you?"
 
Ruthanne said:
How about you?
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I've always loved Christmas. It was horribly difficult the year I lost a baby girl. And the years I lost a brother, my daddy, and my mama last year. But Christmas came and although difficult, it was still Christmas and I still loved it. I hope it's the same for you this year, Ruthanne. Remember the good Christmases with your Suzy and maybe try to sneak a little smile out for her?
 
Ruthanne, I am so sorry for you and all who do not look forward to the holidays - mostly due to loss and loneliness. Sending you hugsssss from across the miles!

Christmas is my favorite time of year, actually between Thanksgiving and New Years - but it's because we get the most days off from work! :ROFLMAO:

I love colder weather, which is in short supply where I'm at - so that's another reason I enjoy this season. [ and the Christmas Lights, I love those too ].

I miss the good ole days when my kids lived at home, but with life comes change.

I do not know what you are going through, but I know many suffer this time of year. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.
 
Ruthanne said:
Am I alone in feeling that I wish we could skip the holidays this year? I'd rather go straight to New years day.

Having lost my fur baby this year is one of the reasons I feel like this. Also my parents are gone as well as other relatives. It just won't be the same this year without Suzy.

Holidays haven't been right since my parents passed many years ago. I'm totally alone now in this world 🌍. All of my remaining siblings live out of state and never come here for the holidays.

So I will just have to tolerate the hoopla on tv.

How about you?
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We will be spending our holidays alone here in Central Florida. The loss of Suzy will make things more difficult than before for you. My lady friend lost her little fur kid about a year ago, and she still weeps for him every day. It is a mystery to me how we can be so attached to those little souls, but we do.

I'm just hoping to make it thru the holidays without any medical emergencies for either one of us. My lady friend needs to be in a nursing home but can't face the reality.

The only bright spot in my world is that one of my grandsons and his lovely wife just welcomed my first (and maybe last) great grandchild into the family. A healthy boy. They're in the Columbus area so I'm not sure I'll ever make it up there to see him

I will be thinking of you over the holidays, as will many other folks on here. Wishing you the best.
 
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Meh. DGD and her drama with DGS and his GF have thrown a real damper on the holidays, starting with Thanksgiving next week. I wish she'd just grow the eff up.

That hasn't stopped her from requesting that I make her favorite holiday treats, join in on their decorating, etc. I don't want to. I'm just plain worn out and tired of having to be careful not to step on any toes or say the "wrong" thing, whatever it is.

Then there's DD who hasn't spoken to DS in 16 years. He's willing, but she's too busy holding a grudge.

And let's not forget the climate of hate and divisiveness and lack of civility in the US. It doesn't contribute to a festive season.

I'd like to crawl in a hole and pull it in after me. I'd come out on January 2.
 
@Ruthanne

I understand and know the feeling well.
I am alone too.
I do not have any pets now but I do feel your loss of your fur babyhug hug.gif

My grandchildren are not in touch for get together holidays any more.
They just seemed to drift away from family gatherings.
Daughter does it by telephone and siblings are in other countries.

I have not had the 'Christmas Spirit' for a few years now.
It is nice for the children and Santa etc etc. but I am not religious and like you,
I could just skip the whole season.

Sorry, this probably doesn't make you fee; any better.
 
Ruthanne said:
I'm sorry I started this thread. I should have known how it would turn out 😔
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I think it’s a fair question 😇

I am alone as my brother and his family live ten hours away. It doesn’t bother me because I have the Farm and my horses to keep me occupied.

you mentioned you live in an apartment and I would imagine that adds to the feeling of isolation. Is there something you could do to get you out and about over the holidays? If you are able to get around physically, maybe you could volunteer somewhere? A hospital, nursing home, anything that would get you out of the apartment and make you feel needed.

I honestly am not sure how yippee Skippy I would be if it weren’t for this farm and these horses. My horses have always been my saving grace, preserving my sanity, through the worst of the tragedies in my life, which included losing my son in a car accident years ago.

I do not allow myself to dwell on the negative and it’s part of why I watch all those hokey Hallmark Christmas movies lol lol. I have been watching them for a couple of months now. Some of them I have seen so many times I know the scripts, but they are still uplifting to me.
 
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