Meanie Mom- I was

Courtesy of a cushy upbringing, I extended the same to my own children, though was known to occasionally crack the whip when I expected them do something I had asked of them, such as clean up their rooms (i.e., toys on floor, clothes, etc).

Having grown up in a large family and being the oldest, I (more or less) became the the second set of helping hands in the home when it came to pitching in to help with baby siblings, laundry, a little housework (here and there), etc, etc, and so I didn't really have true actual chores per se, and do want to make clear, not once did my mom ever impose baby-care or other domestic things on me, it was me who did a whole lot of offering, because I wanted to. Always made me feel so grown up and mature being able to be the second mom in the home.

About the only thing that was really truly expected of me was babysitting, and for years, Friday nights was babysitting night for me. Mom would get supper out of the way earlier, and by 6:30 pm, mom and dad would tootle-off to get the weekly shopping done, always meeting up with relatives for coffee while they were out, and so I was left in charge to hold the fort down and to care for my baby siblings.

With my own children I gave each little things to do to make them feel special and important, things such as taking the garbage out to the alley on garbage day, bringing the mail in for me, going to the store for me, and so on. Nothing pressing, just little things, and to this day I believe a little direction and responsibility at a young age makes for a better child and a healthier upbringing.

Just as I grew up helping my mom with the care of baby siblings, my two daughters helped me with the care of their baby siblings, and once again, just as I was under no pressure to help my mom with such back in the day, I never imposed or expected my daughters to pitch in with the care of their baby siblings either. Needless to say both of my girls took after me in that regard and were thrilled whenever I handed the task over to them to make up a baby's bottle or change a diaper.

I grew up with friends where chores were imposed upon them, and it did nothing for them other than to make them bitter and eventually revolt.
 

My mom never knew my age. I could have been 11 or 13, 8 or 10, 4 or six, 7? But the day I turned 16, and legally able to get a wage job, she knew that birthday. On my birthday, I had my first part time job, at 3:00 PM, working in a department store. I could keep all the money I made, BUT I, now, had to buy my own clothes, and everything else I needed.
 

Encouraging youngsters to work, part time, as they are growing up, is a Good thing, IMO. There is No better way to instill a sense of financial responsibility into them than doing so...IMO. If they want "extras", buying things with money they've worked for makes them consider the "value" of their purchases. If they are constantly just given everything, many of them begin to think the world owes them a living.
 
Irwin said:
Isn't it illegal to have a kid do that kind of work?
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No. You can't force a minor to work, but 16 is legal working age as long as the employer agrees to hire kids that age. McDonalds and other fast-food places used to. Not sure if they still do.

Family owned businesses can put their kids to work when they're even younger but they can't put them on a payroll til they're 16, and of course, they can't force them to work.

I went to work in my grandfather's tailor shop at 15, but no authorities anywhere cared, or even noticed. I started working on my grandparents' farm when I was 5, bringing in the cows, braiding rope, carrying buckets, fetching stuff... just whatever I was told to do.
 
BlunderWoman said:
When my son was 13 he started up looking for a little trouble to get in to. I told my ex " Take him to work and have him changing tires every day." So my son spent the entire summer changing tires from early in the morning until late in the evening. The next summer I got him a job roofing. One of my sisters back then accused me of 'child abuse' for doing that. Her son dealt drugs in high school and ended up doing some jail time. My son came home with callused hands too tired to get into any trouble. Until now she talks about the 'sad life' I gave my son because I had him working every summer. Everybody got together last week & she mentioned that 'sad life' thing again while patting my son. He laughed. He said " Yeah Mom could get dead serious and she was hard to fool. She knew exactly who she was dealing with though. I think the working was good for me Aunt Mxxxx."

I'm really proud of that kid now. He's a responsible husband. He married a girl that already has a son with an absent father. He loves that kid just like he's his very own. He's a hard worker.

I look back & I still think I did the right thing by keeping that kid busy & tired. My sister still says it was 'abuse'. I didn't keep any of his paychecks & the money he made was his.

Did any of you ever put your kids to work?
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my dad was a "single dad" (widower) with THREE kids under age 8. i was the oldest, my brother was about 5 and my sister about 2.5 at the time when our mom died. his parents stepped in big time to make things as normal as possible. we learning a LOT of skills earlier than most kids. it was a bit of a shock when we each went to college and ran into kids who didn't know how to do laundry. during the semester i did student teaching, i lived with 5 other girls. it became SOP that if you cooked, you didn't have to clean up. they thought i was a Julia Child becaue i could take that package of chicken parts and make it dinner... and they cleaned up any mess i made.
 
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Murrmurr said:
No. You can't force a minor to work, but 16 is legal working age as long as the employer agrees to hire kids that age. McDonalds and other fast-food places used to. Not sure if they still do.

Family owned businesses can put their kids to work when they're even younger but they can't put them on a payroll til they're 16, and of course, they can't force them to work.

I went to work in my grandfather's tailor shop at 15, but no authorities anywhere cared, or even noticed. I started working on my grandparents' farm when I was 5, bringing in the cows, braiding rope, carrying buckets, fetching stuff... just whatever I was told to do.
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I'll bet that was kind of fun for a kid to work on a farm with all the animals, and it's legal for children to do that kind of work as long as it's not hazardous. I would think that changing tires or roofing would be deemed hazardous work, unless it's changing bicycle tires or putting roofs on sheds.

I did some roofing work when I was young and we had to climb up ladders with bundles of shingles on our shoulders—sometimes on some fairly tall buildings. And we had to hang over the edge of the roof to install gutters, which was extremely unnerving for me since I'm not comfortable with heights. I wouldn't think that kids would be allowed to do that kind of work. I was in my 20s, so it was legal.

I had a job washing dishes at a pancake house when I was 16. Worst job, ever! Worst pay, ever, also! My next job was as a gas station attendant, which was a lot better work.
 
Irwin said:
I'll bet that was kind of fun for a kid to work on a farm with all the animals, and it's legal for children to do that kind of work as long as it's not hazardous.
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It was fun but I thought of it as work. I tried to work as hard as my 7 y/o older brother and sometimes I complained that I always got the "baby jobs". We lived there until I was 16. Baby jobs were way behind me by that time, that's for sure. At the time, kids only had to be 9 or 10 to drive trucks and tractors, and you were supposed to only drive on the farm property but we never got into trouble for driving to town. Local police (and everybody else) knew us and just looked the other way.
 
I started working when I was 10 (mother took my money, and my brother started working when he was 12 (he got to keep his).

My son and daughter started working when they were 16. She at Wendy”s and he at Arby’s. They got to keep their money. My daughter bought jeans for 125.00 although I asked her to save for college, she didn’t. She graduated from college, but she had student loans which she paid off in full.

My son bought a car and dated a lot 😂. He did not go to college. At 18 he had a shotgun wedding, as in you will marry my daughter or I will kill you, and soon afterwards a baby. Apparently the chaperones at a out of town school debate were not very good. 🤦🏻‍♀️ The marriage did not last.
 
I had various jobs as a kid. Started delivering newspapers, worked in a hotel and later worked for the local council doing all sorts of dirty jobs, like lifting bins, cutting grass in graveyards etc.. and a postie at Christmas. The money was handy, but the education something you couldn't learn from a book.
1. Everybody needs someone to feel superior to and people like road sweepers, posties etc. are prime targets.
2. Never confuse a person with the job that they do. Some of the people I worked with, although doing menial tasks, were highly intelligent and skilful.
 

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