Misinterpreting things when you're on a forum or social media.

Ronni

Well-known Member
Location
Nashville TN
I'm on a bunch of different forums, social media, private groups, and for the most part I'm an active participant. I've long since realized that without the benefit of facial expression, voice inflection and hand gestures, all of which are adjuncts to communication, that it's often very very easy to misinterpret someone's intention or emotion for what they're expressing.

In the course of daily communication, we rely on non verbal cues constantly to suggest to us the tone of the person speaking. Even if we're on the phone and not face to face, there's so much additional information that can be gleaned from the tone of the person's voice, their inflection, pauses etc., We have none of that in written text. The best we can do is the use of emoji as a poor substitute.

I've learned that when I read something from someone that seems offensive, rude or disrespectful, if I'm starting to feel slighted in any way, the FIRST thing I do is to ask for clarification, determine if they actually meant to be rude or offensive, because that's the way it's coming across. Taking that bit of time to clarify what they meant typically saves me a LOT of time later, having to do damage control on an argument that was purely the result of a misunderstanding.

How do YOU deal with issues on forums or groups where it seems like you've been insulted or disrespected?
 

Now I take a short break sometimes.

I have to try really hard on forums...Ive messed up a few times by taking things the wrong way. Ive said/done things I’m not proud of but that’s in my past.

Im too impulsive so now I try and wait before I reply to something...doesn’t always work though.

There are people that bring out the worst in me...some I avoid.
 
CeeCee you are so smart to do that. I really appreciate the fact that you are very self aware, so many people aren’t.
 

I've learned that when I read something from someone that seems offensive, rude or disrespectful, if I'm starting to feel slighted in any way, the FIRST thing I do is to ask for clarification, determine if they actually meant to be rude or offensive, because that's the way it's coming across. Taking that bit of time to clarify what they meant typically saves me a LOT of time later, having to do damage control on an argument that was purely the result of a misunderstanding.
Not really in line with forums or social media, but this old poster I made in another life came to mind;

Rc3Gyb7.jpg
 
I'm with CeCe in that I occasionally take a few weeks off from a particular site, or sometimes from all of them. It is good to look up from the screen and view the larger world once in a while.
 
It's complicated. :playful:

I consider the source.

I read the comment a few times until I'm sure of the intent.

I let it slide.

I wait to see how other people interpret the comment/topic.

I take the bait and dive in.

It's complicated.:playful:
 
My responses allow for no ambiguity: If I'm annoyed, by you, I will let you know, in no uncertain terms. If someone writes in such a way as to not make clear exactly what he/she means to express, and how what he/she is expressing is meant to be taken, I have no time for that individual. Write what you mean, make it clear, or hit the road. Life is too short to try and decipher the ramblings of those who write in code.
 
My responses allow for no ambiguity: If I'm annoyed, by you, I will let you know, in no uncertain terms. If someone writes in such a way as to not make clear exactly what he/she means to express, and how what he/she is expressing is meant to be taken, I have no time for that individual. Write what you mean, make it clear, or hit the road. Life is too short to try and decipher the ramblings of those who write in code.

What do you mean by that?
 
What do you mean by that?

:laugh: :laugh:

I always take the high road when dealing with people on the internet and I have a six foot stack of smashed keyboards to prove it.

It is kinda funny how words on a screen that mean literally nothing can get under your skin sometimes. I do what Cee Cee does, take a few minutes to digest things and see how it looks after.
 
I sure have made mistakes, but am learning daily "what to" and "what not to" write. I can be a very funny/humorous guy, but there are those that don't like the "attitude" and/or sarcasm that I use. My wife doesn't have a problem with my humor, but then again, her two previous husbands didn't have a "sense of humor" at all...…...at least that what she tells me.

However, I have actual experience about certain things that many on this forum wouldn't know...…...like pro-rodeo or working at a livestock sales yard, which I did both of.
 
I take breaks from time to time but I generally feel that if something comes across as snarky, it was meant to be that way. & that some people say things in forums that they'd not do in real life.
 
I take breaks from time to time but I generally feel that if something comes across as snarky, it was meant to be that way. & that some people say things in forums that they'd not do in real life.

For sure! There would be a lot of people walking around with bruises if they talked to people in real life the way they do to people on a computer screen.
 
I couldn't agree more Ronni.

I use the emoticons as much as I can to get the tone of my comment over in the hope people will know how I'm feeling but it's still difficult

I've been accused on more than one occasion of saying a thing in a way that wasn't meant at all....and even when I express that there was no intention for my post to be taken in a negative way , they've insisted..clearing looking for a fight!!

nine times out of 10 unless the post it clearly abusive, or personal..it's not the commentator who is at fault but instead the way the reader has chosen to believe it was written.
 
I sure have made mistakes, but am learning daily "what to" and "what not to" write. I can be a very funny/humorous guy, but there are those that don't like the "attitude" and/or sarcasm that I use. My wife doesn't have a problem with my humor, but then again, her two previous husbands didn't have a "sense of humor" at all...…...at least that what she tells me.

However, I have actual experience about certain things that many on this forum wouldn't know...…...like pro-rodeo or working at a livestock sales yard, which I did both of.


This post is an example...it’s taking everything I have not to make a snarky reply. :)

I’ll add the J/K and the :)

but its really only because I have a history with Cody...anybody else saying it wouldn’t bug me.
 
I sure have made mistakes, but am learning daily "what to" and "what not to" write. I can be a very funny/humorous guy, but there are those that don't like the "attitude" and/or sarcasm that I use. My wife doesn't have a problem with my humor, but then again, her two previous husbands didn't have a "sense of humor" at all...…...at least that what she tells me.

However, I have actual experience about certain things that many on this forum wouldn't know...…...like pro-rodeo or working at a livestock sales yard, which I did both of.

Everyone on this forum has actual experience about certain things that many on this forum wouldn't know. That's what makes it so entertaining.
 
Everyone on this forum has actual experience about certain things that many on this forum wouldn't know. That's what makes it so entertaining.

Well said! I have all KINDS of experience about certain things that I just know you all dont' know!!!! Dontcha know? :lol:
 

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