Nothing Beats Marriage

On a note about what Mitch wrote --- we don't know all that Mitch is feeling or thinking. One could read his statement and think that he, like many humans, finds life incredibly difficult without a close relationship which is understandable. And I noted that he did state he would be looking for empathy and sympathy which shows thoughtfulness on his part and maybe he has a lot of these 2 things to give to someone. Two things could be true at one time --- that he loves his current wife AND that he would not want to pine away if she passed. We could also consider that his current wife may be fully aware of exactly where Mitch stands on this subject and is cool with it.
Agree. What a kind post.
 
I didn't marry until my late twenties. While I love my husband and my life with him more than words can express, living on my own or with various roommates for about ten years taught me that I don't need a man around.

That's particularly true now because I have additional support in my life: nearby are two sons plus a son-in-law, all of whom would gladly help with chores I couldn't manage. Same with my DD and 2 DDILs.

DH is in the same boat. Can't imagine either of us would be interested in remarrying if widowed.
I also didn’t meet my husband until I was almost 30 and since I left home at a very young age, I had a good single life. I didn’t need a man around but fell in love 🥰 unexpectedly. No complaints though.
 

DeePhase2

New Member
I think everyone understood this. Mitch seems like a nice guy and I'm sure no one's response meant that he should pine away. Most of the comments that were negative (at least my own) were most likely about the "insensitive-sounding" statement that he would replace a wife of more than 6 decades "within 30 days."Y

I think everyone understood this. Mitch seems like a nice guy and I'm sure no one's response meant that he should pine away. Most of the comments that were negative (at least my own) were most likely about the "insensitive-sounding" statement that he would replace a wife of more than 6 decades "within 30 days."
Yes, I agree with you, he did word it insensitively. I don't know anything about Mitch personally. I just didn't want to write him off for trying to make his life work for him.
 

Evada

New Member
Never been married since I always considered that there's no need to sign official papers to be with somebody. In way too many instances marriage is a bonanza for divorce lawyers and gold diggers (and the stats are on my side ...)
 

CallMeKate

Senior Member
Location
Mid-Atlantic US
Eight years after losing my wife I can't say that I am still mourning but there isn't a night I don't wish I could still hold her. I am still wearing my wedding ring! Quite irrationally I feel it would be a betrayal of our 54 years together if I took it off!
It doesn't seem irrational to me at all, @Old Salt ... it sounds like a tribute to a lady you deeply loved for a long time.
 

horseless carriage

Well-known Member
Eight years after losing my wife I can't say that I am still mourning but there isn't a night I don't wish I could still hold her. I am still wearing my wedding ring! Quite irrationally I feel it would be a betrayal of our 54 years together if I took it off!

How Do I Love Thee? (Sonnet 43)​

Elizabeth Barrett Browning - 1806-1861
How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
I love thee to the depth and breadth and height
My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight
For the ends of being and ideal grace.
I love thee to the level of every day’s
Most quiet need, by sun and candle-light.
I love thee freely, as men strive for right.
I love thee purely, as they turn from praise.
I love thee with the passion put to use
In my old griefs, and with my childhood’s faith.
I love thee with a love I seemed to lose
With my lost saints. I love thee with the breath,
Smiles, tears, of all my life; and, if God choose,
I shall but love thee better after death.
 
Just for argument's sake. I think that in the past people tried harder to make a marriage work and were successful in many cases, when nowadays they would choose the path of divorce!

This was also greatly beneficial to their children who didn't have to face "Dad's weekend etc."

Abusive marriages excepted, of course! Even marriages where former lovers find themselves living in a high tension, incompatible state! Get divorced, you only have one life to live!

Living together sometimes (certainly not always) can mean "I don't like commitment!" Am I wrong? I am willing to be corrected!
 

Timewise 60+

Senior Member
Yep, we have been married for over 50 years and I recall as a young married guy I was determined to make the marriage last. Like all, we had our ups and downs, but looking back I have no regrets and it has been a good life after all. I think my three kids and six grandkids would agree.

I think a lot of young today have trouble finishing what they start. That, sadly, includes marriage for many. The grass always looks greener on the other side, but if you go to it, you find it is just the same grass that you already had.
 
My wife and I will have our 58th anniversary this Summer. If she were to pass, I would learn to adapt to a single life. At least we have the kids and grandkids fairly nearby, and that would help.
Yep, we all have to adapt! Having a close relationship with our children and grandchildren certainly helps! May you have many more years together!
 


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