Rose65
Well-known Member
- Location
- United Kingdom
The old patterns only give us ongoing old results and yet we keep repeating them - at least I do. Yet I know it is definitely possible to override old habits and attitudes but it takes real effort. The good news is the effort is only for a short time. A surprisingly short time, and well worth it.
Examples are biting nails. I used in my youth to do that but I stopped, my nails have been nice for years. Two sugars in tea, I gave it up. I found cutting down to one didn't work but miraculously giving it up was far easier. Now I hate sugary tea, it's saved my teeth. I didn't like exercise, so a few months ago I made myself do 10 minutes every day. After about a month I enjoyed those 10 minutes and now wouldn't be without them to begin my day. I feel a little stronger and more flexible daily.
A habit is only what you always do, and we you DO have the ability to change.
Other matters are harder. Those destructive patterns with difficult people, learning to say no and not letting them take advantage of you. Once you begin doing something about it, it gets easier and confidence grows. It's that initial hurdle, forcing yourself to confront all that is bad news for your wellbeing and then doing what is needed.
New Year is a great chance. However, one thing I have learned is - do not be too ambitious, never aim above what is realistic because failure is then guaranteed and horrible. Conquering small things builds confidence.
So which habits and patterns need sorting out in your case?
Mine is weight, 20 pounds must go. Also negative thinking, I need to seriously work on that and be a more positive person. An actual plan is necessary, not just a vague intention, so I am stepping up exercise and cutting carbs for my weight and quite happy to aim for a pound a week. For the negative thinking I am deliberately choosing funny books and films to raise my spirits. It sounds daft but it works. Our choices of what to focus upon are within our own power. I also don't watch the news and do focus on keeping myself busy. It's already working.
Examples are biting nails. I used in my youth to do that but I stopped, my nails have been nice for years. Two sugars in tea, I gave it up. I found cutting down to one didn't work but miraculously giving it up was far easier. Now I hate sugary tea, it's saved my teeth. I didn't like exercise, so a few months ago I made myself do 10 minutes every day. After about a month I enjoyed those 10 minutes and now wouldn't be without them to begin my day. I feel a little stronger and more flexible daily.
A habit is only what you always do, and we you DO have the ability to change.
Other matters are harder. Those destructive patterns with difficult people, learning to say no and not letting them take advantage of you. Once you begin doing something about it, it gets easier and confidence grows. It's that initial hurdle, forcing yourself to confront all that is bad news for your wellbeing and then doing what is needed.
New Year is a great chance. However, one thing I have learned is - do not be too ambitious, never aim above what is realistic because failure is then guaranteed and horrible. Conquering small things builds confidence.
So which habits and patterns need sorting out in your case?
Mine is weight, 20 pounds must go. Also negative thinking, I need to seriously work on that and be a more positive person. An actual plan is necessary, not just a vague intention, so I am stepping up exercise and cutting carbs for my weight and quite happy to aim for a pound a week. For the negative thinking I am deliberately choosing funny books and films to raise my spirits. It sounds daft but it works. Our choices of what to focus upon are within our own power. I also don't watch the news and do focus on keeping myself busy. It's already working.
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