The Cheeky Friendly Banter Thread!

Hello everyone.


Cheeky Friendly Banter?


Well I suppose we all have our own idea of what that is!
But really, this could be about almost anything one would be chatting, laughing and joking about down at the local pub or bar perhaps.

Or wherever with our friends.
And of course some people, particularly down at the Boozer can be rather riskay.

But as far as I am concerned, the world is your oyster though in respect of subjects, jokes, smiley's, videos etc. etc. which involve Friendly Cheeky Banter.

For instance...


;)
Or...
AIDS WARNING!


To all of you approaching 50 or have REACHED 50 and past, this post is especially for you......

SENIOR CITIZENS ARE THE NATION'S LEADING CARRIERS OF AIDS!

HEARING AIDS

BAND AIDS

ROLL AIDS

WALKING AIDS

MEDICAL AIDS

GOVERNMENT AIDS

MOST OF ALL,


MONETARY AID TO THEIR KIDS!


 

Original Poster
Thank you very much for contributing to this thread guys.
If it makes anyone happy, or gives a giggle.
Well I am happy also!


[FONT=Verdana, Tahoma, DejaVu Sans, sans-serif]Bob and the Blonde... a sad story so get your handkerchief out!!!![/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Tahoma, DejaVu Sans, sans-serif] [/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Tahoma, DejaVu Sans, sans-serif] [/FONT][FONT=Verdana, Tahoma, DejaVu Sans, sans-serif]Bob walked into a sports bar around 9:58 PM.[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Tahoma, DejaVu Sans, sans-serif]He sat down next to a blonde at the bar[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Tahoma, DejaVu Sans, sans-serif]And stared up at the TV.[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Tahoma, DejaVu Sans, sans-serif]The 10 PM news was coming on.[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Tahoma, DejaVu Sans, sans-serif]The news crew was covering the story[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Tahoma, DejaVu Sans, sans-serif]Of a man on the ledge of a large building[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Tahoma, DejaVu Sans, sans-serif]Preparing to jump.[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Tahoma, DejaVu Sans, sans-serif]The blonde looked at Bob and said,[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Tahoma, DejaVu Sans, sans-serif]"Do you think he'll jump?"[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Tahoma, DejaVu Sans, sans-serif]Bob said,"You know, I bet he'll jump."[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Tahoma, DejaVu Sans, sans-serif]The blonde replied, "Well, I bet he won't."[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Tahoma, DejaVu Sans, sans-serif]Bob placed a $20 bill on the bar and said,[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Tahoma, DejaVu Sans, sans-serif]"You're on!"[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Tahoma, DejaVu Sans, sans-serif]Just as the blonde placed her money on the bar,[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Tahoma, DejaVu Sans, sans-serif]The guy on the ledge[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Tahoma, DejaVu Sans, sans-serif]Did a swan dive off the building,[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Tahoma, DejaVu Sans, sans-serif]Falling to his death.[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Tahoma, DejaVu Sans, sans-serif]The blonde was very upset,[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Tahoma, DejaVu Sans, sans-serif]But willingly handed her $20 to Bob.[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Tahoma, DejaVu Sans, sans-serif]"Fair's fair. Here's your money."[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Tahoma, DejaVu Sans, sans-serif]Bob replied, I can't take your money.[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Tahoma, DejaVu Sans, sans-serif]I saw this earlier on the 5 PM news,[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Tahoma, DejaVu Sans, sans-serif]So I knew he would jump."[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Tahoma, DejaVu Sans, sans-serif]
The blonde replied, "I did, too,
[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Tahoma, DejaVu Sans, sans-serif]But I didn't think he'd do it again."[/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Tahoma, DejaVu Sans, sans-serif]Bob took the money!!![/FONT]
:D
 

Lara

Well-known member
Location
North Carolina
Pappy, haha, actually laughed out loud. Did you know that some grocery stores really do have a thunder sound along with the spraying of the produce? Like a rainforest. Scared me the first time it happened right when I was reaching in for veggies. A towel boy would have been appreciated. :rolleyes: :angel:

I haven't seen misting or heard thunder in the supermarkets in a long time though. I think they may have stopped. I had read an article years ago that there was concern about bacteria building up in the sprayer nozzles and getting on the produce.

.
 
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Pappy

Living the Dream
Lara. I hadn't heard about the different smells idea. But back in the early 60s, I worked in a supermarket and we were the first store in town to play music. Speakers were installed and we actually played records, 45 rpms, at first. Eventually, music was piped in.
 

Lara

Well-known member
Location
North Carolina
...back in the early 60s, I worked in a supermarket and we were the first store in town to play music. Speakers were installed and we actually played records, 45 rpms, at first. Eventually, music was piped in.
Well, guess what?! You all were on the right track according to studies at the Cosmodal Laboratory at Oxford University. But did you play the appropriate music is the question! For instance, high notes enhance sweetness and low notes enhance bitterness. Studies are also matching pitches with odors. http://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/wordofmouth/2014/mar/11/sound-affects-taste-food-sweet-bitter.

I took their taste test with their music provided. I noticed a very slight difference, if any. But the one I thought might be more bitter matched with the appropriate frequency. I didn't know which frequency produced which when I first took the test. I don't really think it works but if you want to try it, here's the test: http://condimentjunkie.co.uk/blog/2015/4/27/bittersweet-symphony

Meanwhile, here's some music I KNOW will work to enhance the taste of a burger for you guys haha:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EHWTc8cUhkw (Kate Upton is a well known and respected supermodel, honest tsk tsk)
 

Meanderer

Senior Meanderer
Location
Pennsylvania
Funnily enough Meander, and seriously, from when I was aged 33 to 53 I used to wear a Wig!:eek:
that was the worse thing I ever did, as looking back I was more handsome without the wig than with it!
Now I am an even more handsome Slap Head! :D
Choosing not to wear a wig, is like choosing to attend a come-as-you-are LIFE! Good move bc!

Meanwhile, here's some music I KNOW will work to enhance the taste of a burger for you guys haha:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EHWTc8cUhkw (Kate Upton is a well known and respected supermodel, honest tsk tsk)
...burger?....WHAT burger??:confused:
 
Original Poster
After forty years of marriage, a wife asked her husband to describe her.

He looked at her for a while, then said:

"My darling, all I can say is this"..

"You're an alphabet wife... A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K."

She asks: "What the hell does that mean?"

He replied:
"Adorable, Beautiful, Cute, Delightful, Elegant, Foxy,Gorgeous and Hot".

She smiled happily and said:
"Oh, that's so lovely, but what about I, J, K?"

He said: "I'm Just Kidding!"

..................................................

I am please to report that theswelling of his black eye eyes are going down.
And the Doctors are hoping to save his testicles.

 

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