The Definitive Guide to Tipping at Any Restaurant in America

S

sargentodiaz

Member
Location
North Las Vegas, NV
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My parents always tipped our servers and I remember how important they were when my mom worked at the Brown Derby Restaurant.
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So, it caught me off guard when I went to France and discovered they included the tip in the tab. Leaving a tip was actuallt considered snobbish and even insulting.
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So, just to give us a guidline, here are some supposed rules for tipping:
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Sit-down restaurants: 20 percent — always.
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If you go big on wines: You don’t need to tip 20 percent on whale bottles.
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Gratuity-included restaurants: Don’t tip — really! ​
Food trucks: Add a buck or two. ​
Bars: Dollar per drink at dives, 20 percent at cocktail bars.
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Bakeries and coffee shops: Add a buck or two.
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Fast-casual counter service: 20 percent​
Delivery: $5 minimum​
I don’t know who this author is but I think she’s full of it. Top at a MacDonald’s? You gotta be kidding me.​
And, first and foremost, a gratuity is to show ones appreciation for good service. I never hesitate a second to stiff a server who should be shoveling manure instead of bringing food to my table.​

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When I was visiting the US, I was advised that around 10% was normal.

One night in a restaurant in Amsterdam, I heard an America lady ask the waiter how much it was normal to tip. He replied, "This is not America , however if you wish to express your thanks, we will be pleased to receive a small gratuity". We always used to round up our bills in the restaurants that we frequented.
 

Down in the most "touristy" area in Orlando (International Drive), some of the restaurants started adding an automatic 18% gratuity to the bill because European tourists weren't leaving tips. This was a win-win situation for the restaurants as a lot of tourists didn't realize the tip was already on the bill and tipped again. I sincerely doubt anybody at the restaurant pointed that out to them.

I'm a standard tipper for standard service and a good tipper on good service.

But I don't understand why tipping is based on the amount of the bill. For instance, if I'm dining with a friend and I order a $4 bowl of chicken noodle soup and my friend orders a $15 bowl of lobster bisque and the waiter brings both at the same time, with the same service. Technically, based on a 20% tip, I only owe him an 80 cent tip while my friend owes a $3 tip. Why? It took exactly the same effort to bring each of us our bowls of soup, glasses of water and the bill. I'm not a cheapskate, I'd give him at least $2 but still...…….
 
No need to tip in the UK, because our waiting staff get a proper wage of at least minimum if not more. Tipping is optional, and most people do it, maybe leave a £1 if it's a cafe or maybe 5 or 10% of the bill in a restaurant...often more, but there's absolutely no need to tip, and it's not expected. Here in the Uk waiting staff don't turn tables, you can sit all day with a coffee in a cafe or all evening at a restaurant without being hassled to finish up and leave because the waiting staff need to earn as much as possible from tipping! It's the same throughout Europe...
 
I found it hard to get used to not tipping in Australia. Here in my city, tipping is generally between 15% - 20%, depending on the restaurant.
 
First of all, tips are usually shared, especially at mid-priced and high-end restaurants. The busboys and host/hostess get a share. Some waitstaff share with the kitchen staff. AND the IRS assumes you have tipped, and assesses income tax at a rate from 8-15% depending on overall income.

Tipping in the US is voluntary. Unless you are in a county that has mandated an average minimum wage for all workers, in many areas there are waitstaff making about $2.50/hr., who are dependent upon tips.

My mother was a waitress, as a divorced mom with only a HS education and no business skills. My spouse worked as a waiter while he went through the local hotel and restaurant management program.

As an individual you are certainly free not to tip, or tip poorly. But speaking only for myself, I personally think that waitstaff work harder for their tips than I ever did at my sit-down white-collar job. I tip, and I do so generously.

YMMV.
 
I usuallly give a generous tip but I don't leave a percentage.The staff at a cheap cafe work just as hard as those at a fancy high priced restaurant. A $10 meal or a $50 meal....same service = same tip.
 
I usually leave a decent tip, unless service is bad or server is rude.

However...imo tipping has gotten way out of hand.

Nobody is denying that servers work hard. But I don't understand why customers/patrons should subsidize cheapskate employers. Any employer paying $2.50/hr is a cheapskate - and because tipping is the norm in the US, in a way, people who tip are part of the problem. Why? Because we/they are enabling the cheapskate employers.

And tip jars? Pfftt. :rolleyes: I know of many people who are overworked and underpaid and they don't carry around a tip jar.

I've seen restaurants that have a sign: "No tipping. We pay our employees a decent wage."
 
Lethe200 said:
First of all, tips are usually shared, especially at mid-priced and high-end restaurants. The busboys and host/hostess get a share. Some waitstaff share with the kitchen staff. AND the IRS assumes you have tipped, and assesses income tax at a rate from 8-15% depending on overall income.

Tipping in the US is voluntary. Unless you are in a county that has mandated an average minimum wage for all workers, in many areas there are waitstaff making about $2.50/hr., who are dependent upon tips.

My mother was a waitress, as a divorced mom with only a HS education and no business skills. My spouse worked as a waiter while he went through the local hotel and restaurant management program.

As an individual you are certainly free not to tip, or tip poorly. But speaking only for myself, I personally think that waitstaff work harder for their tips than I ever did at my sit-down white-collar job. I tip, and I do so generously.

YMMV.
Click to expand...

My mother waitressed in Manhattan, NY, during WWII and after. Until her dying day she could bring to mind who tipped generously and who stiffed her. We kids learned early that if we had $5 to spend on a meal, we needed to choose something on the menu that cost no more than $4 because a tip is part of the cost of the meal.

If I could count how many times I've stiffed or undertipped (less than 15%) in this lifetime, I could do so on one hand and still have fingers left over.

Waitstaff have physically demanding jobs, generally can't get full time hours, and as Letthe said, they often share tips with bus and kitchen staff.

I err on the side of generosity, particularly when in contact with minimum wage employees who are doing their best to keep themselves afloat. Rarely do I tip less than 20%, more if the food is inexpensive.

Many years ago our business had a banner year and I was pretty flush. We went to see a play in Hollywood and there was a 60-ish ladies room attendant. During intermission while waiting for an open toilet I observed numerous well-dressed women take the paper towels the attendant offered with barely a thanks. When it was my turn to receive a towel I handed her a folded tip. She smiled and thanked me. I often wondered what she thought when she opened that bill and saw Benjamin Franklin's face.
 
"Ya got me all misty-eyed."
Lt. Col. Frank Slade (Al Pacino) in Scent of a Woman 1992

My mother and grandmother cleaned houses and offices during WWII, Korean War, and even the Vietnam War. There was a period of time when my dad, an educated man, mopped & waxed floors in office buildings for very little money. The father of one of my best friends graduated from Tufts University but for a long time had to shine shoes. Think they got tips? Uh, no.

The point is that if the workers in restaurants/eateries is being "stiffed" it's NOT by the customers/patrons - the "stiffing" is being done by their EMPLOYER. I don't see why that's so hard to understand. Oh wait, it isn't.

If some people have so much extra money and want to subsidize cheapskate owners/employers they certainly have the right to do that but they should think about spreading the wealth; i.e., toss money around to various workers who are underpaid. There are lots of them - they don't all work in restaurants. I could even give you some names.

Hey - Frank Sinatra used to toss $100 bills at cocktail waitresses. Maybe you generous tippers should follow his example. Go for it!
 
At restaurants, generally 15 to 20%
Delivery truck drivers usually $15 to $20
When I went to hairdressers I usually tipped anywhere from $5 to $10
We never use taxi services and we also don’t usually tip when we stay at a hotel. I’m not sure why?
Perhaps it’s because I’ve never done that type of labour but did waitressing to get me through school and it was, by far, the best money I ever made.

I believe I’m a very grateful person and like to show it
 
StarSong said:
My mother waitressed in Manhattan, NY, during WWII and after. Until her dying day she could bring to mind who tipped generously and who stiffed her. We kids learned early that if we had $5 to spend on a meal, we needed to choose something on the menu that cost no more than $4 because a tip is part of the cost of the meal.

If I could count how many times I've stiffed or undertipped (less than 15%) in this lifetime, I could do so on one hand and still have fingers left over.

Waitstaff have physically demanding jobs, generally can't get full time hours, and as Letthe said, they often share tips with bus and kitchen staff.

I err on the side of generosity, particularly when in contact with minimum wage employees who are doing their best to keep themselves afloat. Rarely do I tip less than 20%, more if the food is inexpensive.

Many years ago our business had a banner year and I was pretty flush. We went to see a play in Hollywood and there was a 60-ish ladies room attendant. During intermission while waiting for an open toilet I observed numerous well-dressed women take the paper towels the attendant offered with barely a thanks. When it was my turn to receive a towel I handed her a folded tip. She smiled and thanked me. I often wondered what she thought when she opened that bill and saw Benjamin Franklin's face.
Click to expand...
I like your style Starsong. You’ve got class.

*********
Yes employers SHOULD pay their workers more but unfortunately in certain areas of employment they DON’T and for those who CARE about equality for all, we tip!
 
applecruncher said:
"Ya got me all misty-eyed."
Lt. Col. Frank Slade (Al Pacino) in Scent of a Woman 1992

My mother and grandmother cleaned houses and offices during WWII, Korean War, and even the Vietnam War. There was a period of time when my dad, an educated man, mopped & waxed floors in office buildings for very little money. The father of one of my best friends graduated from Tufts University but for a long time had to shine shoes. Think they got tips? Uh, no.

The point is that if the workers in restaurants/eateries is being "stiffed" it's NOT by the customers/patrons - the "stiffing" is being done by their EMPLOYER. I don't see why that's so hard to understand. Oh wait, it isn't.

If some people have so much extra money and want to subsidize cheapskate owners/employers they certainly have the right to do that but they should think about spreading the wealth; i.e., toss money around to various workers who are underpaid. There are lots of them - they don't all work in restaurants. I could even give you some names.

Hey - Frank Sinatra used to toss $100 bills at cocktail waitresses. Maybe you generous tippers should follow his example. Go for it!
Click to expand...

I’m not sure how you can take a act of generosity and turn it into such a condescending criticism.
You have just divided generous individuals who care about others into egotistical wealthy snobs with nothing better to do with their money!

Sometimes I wish you’d leave your brash insulting attitude at the front door
 
Thank you for your kind words, Keesha.

AC, I don't know if you're aware of it but Frank Sinatra was reputedly a very generous man, both privately and publicly. Los Angeles and NY are filled with stories about his support of charities and generosity toward people he came across who were in need.

Frank was no saint, but was certainly an extremely loyal friend, openly refusing to patronize hotels or other venues that denied service to Sammy Davis, Jr., fellow Rat Pack member and one of his besties.
 
Keesha said:
I’m not sure how you can take a act of generosity and turn it into such a condescending criticism.
You have just divided generous individuals who care about others into egotistical wealthy snobs with nothing better to do with their money!

Sometimes I wish you’d leave your brash insulting attitude at the front door
Click to expand...

Maybe you should learn that not everyone has to agree with you all the time. Also consolidate your comments instead of trying to increase your post count.

Learn to use ignore feature - it works quite well. Better than personal attacks.

I stand by what I said about tipping. If you disagree so be it.
 
StarSong said:
Thank you for your kind words, Keesha.

AC, I don't know if you're aware of it but Frank Sinatra was reputedly a very generous man, both privately and publicly. Los Angeles and NY are filled with stories about his support of charities and generosity toward people he came across who were in need.

Frank was no saint, but was certainly an extremely loyal friend, openly refusing to patronize hotels or other venues that denied service to Sammy Davis, Jr., fellow Rat Pack member and one of his besties.
Click to expand...

I know all about Frank Sinatra. No need to try to educate me about him.
 
btw - It's been many years but I remember the women who used to stand in some restrooms and hand you a towel to dry your hands. Glad they're gone; a pointless job and they were treated in a very condescening manner or just ignored.

I recall seeing one of those "attendants" in the movie Valley of the Dolls c. 1967. She helped Susan Hayward after Patty Duke threw her wig into the toilet. :laugh:

I prefer privacy when I use the bathroom, and I don't need someone hanging around waiting to hand me a paper towel and expecting a tip. Besides, who knows where their hands have been? Creepy.
 

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