The silence of living alone.

For over a year, I was in and out of hospitals, care facilities,and 1 home. When I go to my local ER, I can point and say,"I've been in that cubicle, that one, that one, that one, this one's my favorite". But now I'm home. What bothers me is the silence. In all those previous places, people were running around, shouting, coughing, even vomiting. Now NOTHING. I live in the sticks where you can here deer hoofs clicking on the rocks. I have to have the TV on, if I'm awake.
 

Beccaboo

New Member
Location
Virginia
I know that silence and fuzzybuddy it is hard to deal with. Ever since that day on December 12, 2018 when my husband was tragically killed on the job as he was a Police officer and I realized he was never coming home and then shortly after that my youngest daughter moving out I have that silence other than the company of my Yellow Lab Finn who is a godsend. I do not know if you are able to get a pet, but having one has helped me out a lot. Last year this time I certainly was not thinking I would be living alone even though my husband and I knew my youngest would be leaving the nest. I never thought my husband would have lost his life in the line of duty. It is hard fuzzybuddy and if you can get a pet I would highly recommend it.
 

hollydolly

SF VIP
Location
London England
I am having trouble right now dealing with the solitude. Especially since I am not going to the nursing home every day. I am taking this week to fly under the radar for a time. But the quiet can be deafening. I keep TV on, even when doing things around the house.
It must be so hard for you Marie, because when your hubs was ill and in hospital, at least you still had somewhere to go to visit him and talk with him, so now not only has your husband gone but you've lost the purpose of your day in many ways...


Big ((hugs)) to you all who are so recently bereaved!!!
 

hollydolly

SF VIP
Location
London England
For over a year, I was in and out of hospitals, care facilities,and 1 home. When I go to my local ER, I can point and say,"I've been in that cubicle, that one, that one, that one, this one's my favorite". But now I'm home. What bothers me is the silence. In all those previous places, people were running around, shouting, coughing, even vomiting. Now NOTHING. I live in the sticks where you can here deer hoofs clicking on the rocks. I have to have the TV on, if I'm awake.
Perhaps we could get voice activated postings on here... :D.... it might be like the tower of Babel tho', no-one able to understand everyone's accents...
 

Bonnie

SF VIP
Location
Texas
Sometimes I put the TV on, but mostly upbeat music on the radio fills my day. I've been doing that for years though, even before I was alone.
 

Victor

Member
Location
midwest USA
I too like the silence. I don't play the television much or my numerous CDs and records. Some classical music.
No one calls me--except scammers.
Can't stand stores with soundtracks.
Rosemarie--you ere a librarian, that explains it. Are you a librarian because you like silence
or do you like silence because you were a librarian?
 

Babs

New Member
I suppose I am use to living alone since I have been divorced for 50 years. I haven't been living alone for all of those years as I have had my daughter living with me for 22 of those years and then have long term relationships with men that we lived together during that time as well, but now I am just used to. While at home I pretty much always have music playing in the background to get that complete silence eliminated.
 

Ruth n Jersey

Well-known Member
I love silence. I like it so quiet I can hear my heart beat. I do like the sounds of nature. Birds chirping, rustling leaves and the sounds of an approaching thunder storm, a babbling brook. What I can't stand is the kids screaming their lungs out in the neighbors pool with the so called music blasting. Some day I'm going over there and throw the radio into the pool while they are all in there.
 

Rosemarie

Well-known Member
Location
England
I too like the silence. I don't play the television much or my numerous CDs and records. Some classical music.
No one calls me--except scammers.
Can't stand stores with soundtracks.
Rosemarie--you ere a librarian, that explains it. Are you a librarian because you like silence
or do you like silence because you were a librarian?
I love being surrounded by books!
 

WhatInThe

Well-known Member
I know some who are using I need people, noise and activity as an excuse to stay out of a nursing home or retirement community. I'll admit many go into those place waiting for the end. Those people are always liked quiet always liked or appreciated quiet. I think the activity/noise gives some a sense of a family in a house in an apartment complex. I've heard some they enjoy hearing kids playing , birds, dogs or others noises from the outside world.

I've always like the quiet to the point if I'm awake in bed I get to learn schedules wether it be someone coming or going to work or public transportation.
 

Kris148

Member
I know some who are using I need people, noise and activity as an excuse to stay out of a nursing home or retirement community. I'll admit many go into those place waiting for the end. Those people are always liked quiet always liked or appreciated quiet. I think the activity/noise gives some a sense of a family in a house in an apartment complex. I've heard some they enjoy hearing kids playing , birds, dogs or others noises from the outside world.

I've always like the quiet to the point if I'm awake in bed I get to learn schedules wether it be someone coming or going to work or public transportation.
I do like total quiet when it comes to sleepy time. That and a totally dark room.
 

Don M.

Well-known Member
Location
central Missouri
I, too, like a quiet environment, but I also like some "companionship". A few months ago, one of our granddaughters moved to a small town about 15 miles away, after she went through a divorce, and she has two daughters. Since then, my wife, and one of the Son-in-Laws mothers, go over there on Sundays through Tuesdays, every other week, while the granddaughter is working extended shifts at an area hospital, and take care of the kids. So, every two weeks, I have this place to myself for a couple of days. It's kind of nice playing "bachelor" for a couple of days, but I am glad when Tues evening rolls around and my wife comes back home. This experience has made us both a bit more appreciative of each other, and I would dread losing my wife.
 

Connie

New Member
So many different thoughts. I'm more the like it quiet type. Not 24/7 365 though. I am a director of independent senior housing and folks move in that have lost a spouse, or a couple comes to live that their children are moved to their own homes etc. Gives them people to be around when they want. Maybe there are places like mine where you all live?
 


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