hollydolly
SF VIP
- Location
- London England
A young man joined the army. On the first day of Basic Training, the DI told the new recruits “Due to budget cuts, we cannot afford to give you a rifle.
Instead, we’ll give you a stick. You are to point your stick at the target and yell ‘BANGITY-BANG!’”
So that’s what they did all day. BANGITY-BANG! BANGITY-BANG!
The next day the DI told them: “We also cannot afford bayonets, so you will duct tape this plastic fork to the end of your stick, then you will run up to the target and yell ‘STABBITY-STAB!’”
So that’s what they did all day. STABBITY-STAB! STABBITY-STAB!
Unfortunately, on the next day, war broke out. Fortunately, both sides were similarly afflicted by budget cuts. The two armies met each other on the battlefield and raised their sticks. “BANGITY-BANG!” they shouted. Soldiers on both sides fell down.
As the fighting got more intense, they started jabbing each other with their plastic forks, shouting “STABBITY-STAB!” Even more soldiers fell down.
Finally, our new recruit found himself all alone on the battlefield… or so he thought. In the distance he saw an enemy soldier slowly walking towards him. Our brave soldier raised his stick and shouted “BANGITY-BANG!”
But still the enemy soldier kept coming.
When the enemy was close enough, our hero jabbed his fork and shouted “STABBITY-STAB!”
But the enemy soldier pushed our hero down and started walking over him. And as he did, he said:
“TANKITY-TANK! TANKITY-TANK!”
Instead, we’ll give you a stick. You are to point your stick at the target and yell ‘BANGITY-BANG!’”
So that’s what they did all day. BANGITY-BANG! BANGITY-BANG!
The next day the DI told them: “We also cannot afford bayonets, so you will duct tape this plastic fork to the end of your stick, then you will run up to the target and yell ‘STABBITY-STAB!’”
So that’s what they did all day. STABBITY-STAB! STABBITY-STAB!
Unfortunately, on the next day, war broke out. Fortunately, both sides were similarly afflicted by budget cuts. The two armies met each other on the battlefield and raised their sticks. “BANGITY-BANG!” they shouted. Soldiers on both sides fell down.
As the fighting got more intense, they started jabbing each other with their plastic forks, shouting “STABBITY-STAB!” Even more soldiers fell down.
Finally, our new recruit found himself all alone on the battlefield… or so he thought. In the distance he saw an enemy soldier slowly walking towards him. Our brave soldier raised his stick and shouted “BANGITY-BANG!”
But still the enemy soldier kept coming.
When the enemy was close enough, our hero jabbed his fork and shouted “STABBITY-STAB!”
But the enemy soldier pushed our hero down and started walking over him. And as he did, he said:
“TANKITY-TANK! TANKITY-TANK!”