The topics men talk about on a first date, (clean comments only)

[grahamg]

Our local bar held its weekly quiz last night and one of the regular features is called "Our survey says".

The survey in question this week was the top five answers to the question: "What do men choose to talk about on a first date"?

Money came top of this survey as the subject mentioned most often, followed by their cars, their jobs, and so on.

Our quiz team guessed those three and were in error when suggesting s*xual prowess" might be another, (in fact all the answers given in the survey were totally clean and safe to talk about I'm glad to say).

I think someone's taste in music is one I can recall asking about, their family maybe, their job yes, but I cant recall ever mentioning money, the top answer or cars for that matter.

What topics of conversation did you choose on a first date, (if you can remember your most recent first date of course! )?

 

[chic]

Men often talk about themselves either directly or indirectly. The older they are the more likely they are to talk about health in some form even on a first date. Are we talking about the past here, or dating as old folks? When I was young we talked about everything. Our background, astrology, our teachers, stuff like that and young men are so romantic. It's sweet. They can't flatter you enough or do enough for you. Dating in old age is less romantic and more practical. Like what body parts work and which ones don't.

 

[Trish]

One guy told me he was in a rock band and had a pretty wild social life but was willing to give it all up for the right girl.
I was 18 and he had claimed to be 20 but I had my doubts so had checked with a friend who knew him - in fact, he was 17 and at college.

I think guys tended to talk about themselves, music and stuff that interests them. I imagine that guys of our age might talk more about health issues, retirement plans and the difficulty finding good fitting dentures

 

[Alligatorob]

if you can remember your most recent first date of course!

I think I fall in that category!

what body parts work and which ones don't.

LOL!

 

[Gaer]

I once met a tall, handsome fella who asked me out right away
for a prime rib dinner! He seemed really, really nice!
I was so excited about going out with him. He picked me up at
my home and not even a block away from my home, the very
first question out of his mouth prompted me to ask him to please
pull over. He did and I didn't even say goodbye. I just got out
and walked home. What a waste of a good looking man!

 

[Alligatorob]

the very
first question out of his mouth prompted me to ask him to please
pull over

So what was it?

 

[Gaer]

So what was it?

grahamg asked for clean comments only.
It was a perverse question.

 

[Chet]

At a first date I think it's appropriate to talk about yourself as a form of introduction and to have her tell about herself. You were both strangers until you met.

 

[Gary O']

What topics of conversation did you choose on a first date, (if you can remember your most recent first date of course! )?

Been a long while
Seems I never had to say much
None of 'em would let me get a word in edgewise.
So, I just smoked, sipped beer, pretended to listen

Reminds me of an old poster I created in another life;

 

[Packerjohn]

Actually, I talk very little about myself. The less the better. I tend to ask the lady about herself and let her do the talking. Sometimes I comment on her choice of clothes or her hair style. I appreciate the fact that she made herself pretty before coming on the date. I want to get to know her and I get this done by letting her talk about herself and her family.

I would never talk about money, my motor vehicle or brag about what a wonderful guy I am. I think if someone is a wonderful guy, then take the gal out for several dates and let her decide how wonderful you are. Walk the talk is my motto. Talk is cheap and a man bragging about himself makes him one of the world's biggest bores.

I find nothing more boring than someone bragging and bragging about themselves. I am finding that here in Canada and the US almost everyone has lost the ability to listen to people. They just talk about themselves and really don't care about who is next to them. So, you might say I'm a big listener. Sure, I'll answer any questions she might have but talk about money or how many other girl friends I had has to be one of the biggest RED FLAGS in the dating world. No wonder so many people are living alone! They should!

 

[Wren]

I always taught my daughter if she wanted to impress a man on the first date, ask him a question about himself, he’ll talk about himself all night then take her home and tell her what a great night he’s had !

 

[chic]

On one of my geezer first dates, he talked to me about his health, his car, his home, his finances, his five year plan, (You get the idea). I went out with him anyway.

 

[Tish]

What don't they talk about?

 

[Been There]

On a first date, I will try to get my date to talk about herself and her family. A psychologist once told me that people enjoy talking about themselves, so I used that on first dates and it seems to work out well, except eventually, some of them will say "enough about me, what about you and your family?" That's when I get into trouble with the conversation. I don't like talking about my past.

 

[grahamg]

On a first date, I will try to get my date to talk about herself and her family. A psychologist once told me that people enjoy talking about themselves, so I used that on first dates and it seems to work out well, except eventually, some of them will say "enough about me, what about you and your family?" That's when I get into trouble with the conversation. I don't like talking about my past.

I'd struggle when asked to speak about myself in that way too, (though due to my lack of restraint I'd probably have given away many aspects of my life already, without being asked to do so).

 

[grahamg]

Some men really know what a woman wants as you can see:

 

[Della]

I find nothing more boring than someone bragging and bragging about themselves. I am finding that here in Canada and the US almost everyone has lost the ability to listen to people. They just talk about themselves and really don't care about who is next to them. So, you might say I'm a big listener. Sure, I'll answer any questions she might have but talk about money or how many other girl friends I had has to be one of the biggest RED FLAGS in the dating world. No wonder so many people are living alone! They should!

I agree . People have always liked to talk about themselves, but the old rules of etiquette have drifted away and now they don't even seem to try to listen or pass the conversational ball.

The interrupting! I can go for days without managing to get a full sentence out -- even when they have picked the subject and I just want to reinforce it!

Cashier: "Is it still raining out?
Me: "Yes, but it's just a dr..."
Cashier: "Do you want your milk in a bag?"

First dates usually do talk about their jobs, families, where they're from, where they've been deployed (military guys) and I'm happy to listen to all that to get to know them. Sometimes something slips out that has me mentally striking them off the list, a racist remark, bragging, looking down on others, rude to the wait staff, etc. All those things give me a headache and I have to go straight home.

One thing odd I remember, I was a brunette at the time, he said, "The last two women I've gone with were blondes, I feel like a brunette for a change." Please. I'd like to be more than a hair color.

 

[caroln]

One thing odd I remember, I was a brunette at the time, he said, "The last two women I've gone with were blondes, I feel like a brunette for a change." Please. I'd like to be more than a hair color.

It sounds like he was just interested in this:

 

[Ronni]

Ron and I both met when we were seniors. Our primary topic of conversation, the one that interested both of us the most, was our kids and grandkids!! He wanted to know all about mine, and me his.

We also spent some time talking about our exes, the mistakes in those relationships we didn’t want to repeat, whether or not exes were still in our lives etc.

We talked about health, how we were taking care of ourselves, shared opinions about quality of life as we aged etc.

We were both gratified to see how similar we were on these subjects, and for me the kid stuff was especially important. My family has always been the most important thing in my life, and a man who didn’t share a similar commitment towards his own family wasn’t the man for me, no matter how nice he was.

It became obvious, as we got serious, that we had both been completely honest, authentic and transparent about ourselves on those first dates. I mean obviously I knew I had lol but I was curious if he was actually living all the things he’s told me about. He absolutely was!

 

[Michael Z]

The very first date? I guess I might have asked, “How do you like all the rain we have been getting” or maybe “What do think about Algebra class?” Those were desperate moments!

 

[oldaunt]

Some men really know what a woman wants as you can see:

View attachment 264969

A 4020??? A man after my own heart!

 

[Farrah Nuff]

 

[grahamg]

Had to check!
(sardoodledom (uncountable) Well-made works of drama that have trivial, insignificant, or melodramatic plots.)

 

[grahamg]

What "Brides" magazine has to say on the thread topic:
https://www.brides.com/first-date-conversation-4177033

Quote:

• Start With the Basics. ...
• Talk About Where You're From. ...
• Delve Into Preferences. ...
• Discuss Your Favorite Movies, TV Shows, and Books. ...
• Open Up About Your Hobbies. ...
• Have a Conversation About Travel. ...
• Discuss Your Favorite Music. ...
• Chat About Your Ambitions.

More here, (all from a female perspective I suspect:
https://www.mindbodygreen.com/articles/what-to-talk-about-on-first-date

""When you meet someone, whether it's in a romantic context or a work context or anything, and you feel how at ease they are with themselves, that makes you feel good. That makes you want to open up, whether you realize it or not," she recently told mbg. "That's when we're like, this is a nice interaction. This is a nice conversation."

And what not to talk about here:
https://hellorelish.com/articles/first-date-topics.html

1). Money
2). Marriage and Kids
3). Your deepest secrets
4). Talking only about yourself
5). Work Drama

 

[grahamg]

This is more like it,...., "Tips for oldies":
https://sixtyandme.com/mature-dating-tips-5-first-date-questions-and-5-topics-to-avoid/