What is the funniest line you have ever heard from a movie or TV show?

hauntedtexan

hauntedtexan

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Location
Central TX
Some lines I've heard from movies and TV shows leave you guessing when you hear them out of context. I'll start with line by Drew Carey from Season5 Episode 24

"I cried and prayed for 2 weeks, then blew out the seat of my pants"

In context, I laughed out loud while sitting alone......your turn..
 
A line from Taxi when Bill was taking his drivers license test.
Bill, to the other drivers:
What do you do when approaching a yellow light?
Group: Slow down.
Bill: Whaatt dooo youuu dooo when approaching a reddd lighttt?
Group: Slow down.
Bill: Whhhaaattt dooooo youuuuuu dooooo whennnn approooching aaaaa reddddd lighttttt.

Guess you had to see it to understand it. I never laughed so hard in my life.
 
From the movie Tootsie...

Dorothy, talking to Julie the nurse, about Dr. Brewster, who tried to seduce several of the nurses, and then picks up the phone to follow through. It was an ad lib line during taping of the show. It was the way she/he said it:

"I think I'm gonna give every nurse on this floor an electric cattle prod, and just instruct them to just zap him in his badoobies. Ruby? Hi, you wanna open the yellow pages under the section, Farm Equipment retail..."
 
From the Drew Carey Show: Historically drug addled Joe Walsh has just been hired by Drew to be in his band and Joe is at Drew's office when Mimi walks in. Drew starts talking to Mimi and Joe blurts out "Thank God you see her too"!
 
Can't remember the show or the names of the people, but it goes something like this:

A. What did you do this year?

B. I was growing strawberries.


A. Are you gettin' any?

B. Nah, I'm too busy growing strawberries.
 
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