Why do some people act offended when offered help?

Some people have given me the brush-off or even replied with a curt response when I've offered to help them. For example, the Sunday school teacher that I thought could use some study aids for her class. When I presented them to her, she didn't even look at them and said, "I'll pass." Another person in a wheel chair had dropped some groceries in the store and I asked if I could help. She wasn't even as gracious as the Sunday school teacher. She said. "What makes you think I need your help?"
 

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Some people have given me the brush-off or even replied with a curt response when I've offered to help them. For example, the Sunday school teacher that I thought could use some study aids for her class. When I presented them to her, she didn't even look at them and said, "I'll pass." Another person had dropped some groceries in the store and I asked if I could help. She wasn't even as gracious as the Sunday school teacher. She said. "What makes you think I need your help?"
How rude ...:cautious:..and from a Sunday school teacher as well ? 😳
 

I am always happy when someone offers help, even if I don't need it. Hope I show it.

I think some people see an offer of help as a suggestion that they are somehow incompetent and can't do for themselves.
I'm the same I always accept help even if I don't need it, not that it's offered to me much..but.. I always feel that if I turn it down, that maybe one day I might need it, and no-one will offer..
 
Some people have given me the brush-off or even replied with a curt response when I've offered to help them. For example, the Sunday school teacher that I thought could use some study aids for her class. When I presented them to her, she didn't even look at them and said, "I'll pass." Another person had dropped some groceries in the store and I asked if I could help. She wasn't even as gracious as the Sunday school teacher. She said. "What makes you think I need your help?"
Well, the grocery store person was just plain rude... end of story. But the Sunday School teacher may have thought you were saying she wasn't doing her job properly... I'd probably wonder why someone is offering "study aids" when I've most likely spent a lot of time looking for things like that on my own.
 
I occasionally help a woman trying to reach something on a high shelf in a market - always grateful. Just a guess, but I suspect that the Sunday School teacher may have felt that your offer to help implied that her work was inadequate and therefore in need of your unwanted help.
 
I had several discussions with my husband to get him to ask before getting too close to someone while offering help. My fear is that he will try to help someone who might decide to give him a bop on the head before they realize he is just a kind person. Most people like his smile so they allow him to load groceries into their car or reach for something and to the few who don't - their loss.
 
High shelf is okay. Loading my groceries into the car. That's a job I'd rather do myself. Same with putting two 40 pound bags of conditioner salt into my cart. Yeah it looks too heavy for me, but if I don't get to choose and carefully put it in my cart, I might wind up with a bag that leaks salt all over the store and out to my car. Those salt bags are made to leak for some reason.
 
I had several discussions with my husband to get him to ask before getting too close to someone while offering help. My fear is that he will try to help someone who might decide to give him a bop on the head before they realize he is just a kind person.
Why are people so paranoid these days? Are there that many whackos out there, or are they just getting a lot of publicity?
 
The question would be: how can you tell the difference when a stranger suddenly approaches you? You've got seconds to decide ...
I've had this happen to me twice in parking lots. Once at a health food store and once at a grocery store parking lot. They approach me and say something like "can I ask you a question." Or something like that. Both times my response has been quick, severe and aggressive: "GET AWAY FROM ME!" One lady was clearly offended. I was in no need of help. People don't approach me because I'm so pretty and they want to talk to me. And with my history of abuse and bullying, I'm on edge. This wasn't a "lady do you have any money to spare" I've had people approach me with that and I don't freak out because I know what they want, the other was very strange. Why the... do they want to ask me a question?
 
Some people have given me the brush-off or even replied with a curt response when I've offered to help them. For example, the Sunday school teacher that I thought could use some study aids for her class. When I presented them to her, she didn't even look at them and said, "I'll pass." Another person in a wheel chair had dropped some groceries in the store and I asked if I could help. She wasn't even as gracious as the Sunday school teacher. She said. "What makes you think I need your help?"
I hope you don't get discouraged from being helpful. It's a nice quality.
I think people are very distrustful these days and unfortunately with good cause sometimes.
 
I must be living in another world. I help other folks, when I'm able, and now somewhat crippled up and using a cane, I get offers of help. I can't recall anything but smiles and thanks from other folks and I return the same when I'm on the receiving end of the help.

Our facial expressions and general demeanor set the stage as to how folks receive us. If we've, unfortunately, had a rough life, it can show in how strangers perceive us, and how possibly we show suspicion as to their motives.
 
I would have asked the Sunday school teacher in advance if she wanted to look at the material before bringing it. She still shouldn’t have been rude.

I am wary about anyone approaching me in a parking lot or wanting to load my groceries. Too big a risk for something bad to happen. If someone asks me for help in a store to reach sometime, etc I am happy to help.
 
A Russian woman approached me in the street a year or so ago, asking to be my home health aid. I yelled at her and glad I did. Some Nerve.
 
Something as we get older, we don't always realize how we look to others .....

I've been going to the grocery store and loading my bags of groceries into the car for years. No problem.
But it seems that sometimes, if other people are around me, they will come over and offer to help load the car.

Gotta say, it catches me off guard and my initial reaction is feeling insulted, not thankful.

Where are these people when I'm in the grocery store loading heavy cases of water into my shopping cart?:)
 


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