Would you move if you lost your spouse?

AZ Jim said:
I am sitting tight for now. My beloved wife passed 1/30 this year but right now I don't know what I will do. I am disabled and not wealthy so my choices are limited. My home is paid for.
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Maybe as long as you can handle the simple maintenance needed or pay someone to do it, you may be more comfortable staying put. OTOH, maybe a move would help you to change your prospective on things. You probably have a lot of triggers in the house that give you flashbacks with your memory when your wife was alive. I can see where a change may be a good thing for you.
 

Yes, if that happens I'll move. We are in a similar situation; still in a 5 bedroom 2-story house with pool, etc. It was great for our family and is mortgage-free, plus holds a lot of memories of the kids growing up. We have talked about downsizing but we love our neighborhood and the house, so here we stay.

We have a lawn crew so keeping up with the yard work wouldn't be any different, but I'd prefer a smaller home or condo if on my own. I'd probably choose to rent instead of buying something so that my children wouldn't have to deal with that when I'm gone. Plus with a rental, I wouldn't have to worry about taking care of maintenance.
 
AZ Jim said:
I am sitting tight for now. My beloved wife passed 1/30 this year but right now I don't know what I will do. I am disabled and not wealthy so my choices are limited. My home is paid for.
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Yes, I can see where having your home paid for would be an anchor. Our home is paid for also and that is one reason my spouse wants to stay put. This is the only mortgage we have ever paid off and it is a great feeling. It only took us 40 years. :)
 
I keep thinking that one of us will be the survivor. I keep telling Mrs Manatee that being female, statistically she is required to out last me, but that is a toss up at best. Our ground floor condo apartment requires far less upkeep than a house. We had our 60th anniversary 2 weeks ago so we are slowing down. Likely the survivor could wind up living with our daughter. We are hoping our daughter will return to Florida.
 
Manatee said:
I keep thinking that one of us will be the survivor. I keep telling Mrs Manatee that being female, statistically she is required to out last me, but that is a toss up at best. Our ground floor condo apartment requires far less upkeep than a house. We had our 60th anniversary 2 weeks ago so we are slowing down. Likely the survivor could wind up living with our daughter. We are hoping our daughter will return to Florida.
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Congrats on your anniversary!! That is really a milestone. I would find it comforting to know you could live with your daughter if you are the survivor.
 
My husband passed away in December. I owned this apartment since I was 24. We didn't get together until 23 years later. So no, I did not need to sell after he passed. I'm glad he didn't pass away in the apartment though. I'd still stay here but it may have made it more difficult. Not difficult enough to spur a move though. Like Patio, I'm in an ideal location, public transportation is great; I'm near a supermarket, retail establishments, financial institutions and restaurants. Icing on the cake...we pay about 32% of the average housing costs for our city.
 
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I would like to stay in my home. For me it would be feasible because my son takes care of a lot of the upkeep, even now. If he should move on I would then move closer to my daughter. I wouldn't want to actually live with my kids even though we are very close. I guess it sounds funny coming from a 74 year old but I've never been on my own. I went from living with my parents to getting married. I'd like the experience of living alone and knowing I was able to do it even if for a short while.
 
I lost my spouse a few years ago. We lived on a hobby farm and it was too much for me to keep up so I sold the place and moved into a retirement community. Life is so much more simple now. I don't have to worry about lawn care and can come and go when I want to! And I love having neighbors in my age group. Downsizing was the best thing I ever did. I enjoy life more now without being weighed down by "too many material things". Living a more simple life works for this (60 something) gal.
 
Would you move if you lost your spouse?
I lost her at the fair one time, I hurried home to pack but she came home before I could get away! :LOL:

But seriously, no, probably not, since where we live is perfect...don't have to mow the lawn, quiet street, low crime (as far as I know). Lousy neighbors, but what you gonna do?
I doubt my wife would move if she lost me, since this was her home before we met.
 
Ruth n Jersey said:
I would like to stay in my home. For me it would be feasible because my son takes care of a lot of the upkeep, even now. If he should move on I would then move closer to my daughter. I wouldn't want to actually live with my kids even though we are very close. I guess it sounds funny coming from a 74 year old but I've never been on my own. I went from living with my parents to getting married. I'd like the experience of living alone and knowing I was able to do it even if for a short while.
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I'm about in the same situation as you. I live in the mts and I'd be too isolated up here to live on my own. I'd have to move down to the flatlands. Possibly taking turns living with my 3 children who are still alive. It wouldn't be my first choice but it'd have to go on my finances at the time.
 
OneEyedDiva said:
My husband passed away in December. I owned this apartment since I was 24. We didn't get together until 23 years later. So no, I did not need to sell after he passed. I'm glad he didn't pass away in the apartment though.
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So sorry for your loss, OED. I agree that having one's partner die in a place might make it more difficult to stay. My best friend's fiancee died unexpectedly in her house a few years ago. She went upstairs to bed one Saturday night and left him watching a movie on TV. When she got up the next morning she found that he had died on her sofa and was cold to the touch; apparently a massive heart attack. She never got over it and had to sell her house and had the sofa destroyed.
 
C'est Moi said:
So sorry for your loss, OED. I agree that having one's partner die in a place might make it more difficult to stay. My best friend's fiancee died unexpectedly in her house a few years ago. She went upstairs to bed one Saturday night and left him watching a movie on TV. When she got up the next morning she found that he had died on her sofa and was cold to the touch; apparently a massive heart attack. She never got over it and had to sell her house and had the sofa destroyed.
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Thank you so much C'est Moi. Terrible experience for your friend. My cousin's wife had a very similar experience. They went to bed one night and when she woke up the next morning, he was dead in the bed. He was only in his 30's. I believe they were renting and this was decades ago so I don't know if or how quickly she moved. She never married again.
 
If my wife passed away and I was still in good health I would move to the ranch. I just hate living in town.
 


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