Your Pets vs Your Guests

Della

Della

Well-known Member
Location
Ohio
Our mini-dachshund is spoiled. I admit it. We don't have friends and relatives in and out frequently like some people do. She's never once been around children. We are simply three devoted adults competing for her affection and that's all she's known.

But once a year we have relatives come through and visit us for a few days on the way to visit their son's family in North Carolina. They don't like dogs.

She acts angry and speaks harshly to her, whenever our dog puts her feet up on her chair asking to be picked up. They are horrified that she begs at the table. We have to spend the weekend sitting in the tiny den because that's the only place with chairs too high for her to jump up on. They've said, "Why don't you put her outside?" and I've explained that she knows to bark to be let back in and she would continue barking until that happens. She's 14 now, toothless, hard of hearing and half blind but they cut her no slack. I'm dreading their next visit in two weeks.

Thoughts?
 

Then why let them stop by to visit? This is your home with your rules. If they don't like dogs, then have them meet you at a restaurant or park, etc. to visit with you. There is no way I'd let anyone stay in my home that didn't like pets. And no way would I lock them up in a different room to appease them.
 

People who behave this way against pets would have absolutely no rights to visit my wife and me. Tell them they should just stay away. Do it! As we had our beloved cat Lilou we had split up with some people who didn't behave well against her in our house. Avoid such a situation by just not letting them visit you.
 
Della said:
Our mini-dachshund is spoiled. I admit it. We don't have friends and relatives in and out frequently like some people do. She's never once been around children. We are simply three devoted adults competing for her affection and that's all she's known.

But once a year we have relatives come through and visit us for a few days on the way to visit their son's family in North Carolina. They don't like dogs.

She acts angry and speaks harshly to her, whenever our dog puts her feet up on her chair asking to be picked up. They are horrified that she begs at the table. We have to spend the weekend sitting in the tiny den because that's the only place with chairs too high for her to jump up on. They've said, "Why don't you put her outside?" and I've explained that she knows to bark to be let back in and she would continue barking until that happens. She's 14 now, toothless, hard of hearing and half blind but they cut her no slack. I'm dreading their next visit in two weeks.

Thoughts?
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Your home …YOUR RULES! … I wouldn’t let them dictate how they feel your dog should act.
 
yes, your home your rules.

However I can understand them not being comfortable with dogs and in that case I would suggest a compromise - meet at a restaraunt or park or similar neutral ground without the dog.

But if they come to your house, they abide by your rules.
 
Della said:
Our mini-dachshund is spoiled. I admit it. We don't have friends and relatives in and out frequently like some people do. She's never once been around children. We are simply three devoted adults competing for her affection and that's all she's known.

But once a year we have relatives come through and visit us for a few days on the way to visit their son's family in North Carolina. They don't like dogs.

She acts angry and speaks harshly to her, whenever our dog puts her feet up on her chair asking to be picked up. They are horrified that she begs at the table. We have to spend the weekend sitting in the tiny den because that's the only place with chairs too high for her to jump up on. They've said, "Why don't you put her outside?" and I've explained that she knows to bark to be let back in and she would continue barking until that happens. She's 14 now, toothless, hard of hearing and half blind but they cut her no slack. I'm dreading their next visit in two weeks.

Thoughts?
Click to expand...
Let them know, your dog is more family than they are. She’s with you all the time and you LOVE HER. If they don’t like it, they can find some place else to stop. Yes it’s harsh but it’s the absolute truth. At 14, it’s ’your’ responsibility to let them know. We rarely have visitors but when we do we let them know that our dogs come first. If they don’t like that then don’t visit.

Note: I’m impressed with the members answers thus far. Pets are loving members of the family. ALL visitors MUST abide by YOUR rules.
 
I only have a bunny now, but at one time I had 4 cats and a very big dog. If someone came to my house and did not want the cats on their laps, I would just tell them it was the cats' house. Of course, my dog did not get on their lap but she would lay in the middle of the floor and they would have to walk around her. Same thing. It was her home and I would never make her go into another room. I find people who do not like pets are not really people I want in my home.
 
Thanks for all your support! I thought at least some of you would side with them.
Yay pet people!

We never invite them, they just call and say they're coming.

A few years ago we started putting them up, at our expense, at a local Holiday Inn
since we don't have a spare bedroom and we were tired of asking our son to sleep on the couch.
We thought that that would discourage them, but I think it made things worse.

They stay with us until we're half asleep and then come back
bright and very early in the morning.

We will be sure to keep our girl safe on our own laps while they're here though.
 
Years ago one of my dogs was a deaf puppy mill breeder that was scared of everything. Through the years she came out of her shell. My friend came over with her 2 year old granddaughter who was totally ignoring all the dogs.

Every time the toddler turned around and was walking away Josie kept running up and biting her in the butt. Luckily she had a diaper on. After the third attempt I locked Josie in the crate in my bedroom. From then on she was known as the baby killer 🤣.
 
Della said:
Thanks for all your support! I thought at least some of you would side with them.
Yay pet people!

We never invite them, they just call and say they're coming.

A few years ago we started putting them up, at our expense, at a local Holiday Inn
since we don't have a spare bedroom and we were tired of asking our son to sleep on the couch.
We thought that that would discourage them, but I think it made things worse.

They stay with us until we're half asleep and then come back
bright and very early in the morning.

We will be sure to keep our girl safe on our own laps while they're here though.
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I would tell them that you can no longer afford to do this and you don’t have room at your house so they will need to make other arrangements. They are just using you.
 
PeppermintPatty said:
Let them know, your dog is more family than they are. She’s with you all the time and you LOVE HER. If they don’t like it, they can find some place else to stop. Yes it’s harsh but it’s the absolute truth. At 14, it’s ’your’ responsibility to let them know. We rarely have visitors but when we do we let them know that our dogs come first. If they don’t like that then don’t visit.
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Yes it’s harsh but it’s the absolute truth.
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It is not even harsh, it is necessary. Ask my wife, she is the same opinion as me, people, even relatives, who don't like our pets have absolutely no rights to be with us. Pets are family members. If other people show a rude behavior against them, I'll kick them out.
 
Teacher Terry said:
Years ago one of my dogs was a deaf puppy mill breeder that was scared of everything. Through the years she came out of her shell. My friend came over with her 2 year old granddaughter who was totally ignoring all the dogs.

Every time the toddler turned around and was walking away Josie kept running up and biting her in the butt. Luckily she had a diaper on. After the third attempt I locked Josie in the crate in my bedroom. From then on she was known as the baby killer 🤣.
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You shouldn't have locked Josie. Who is more important, your friend's granddaughter or Josie?
 
George1959 said:
You shouldn't have locked Josie. Who is more important, your friend's granddaughter or Josie?
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I’m not letting my dog bite a child. They only stayed a few hours and it didn’t hurt Josie. In fact all 4 Maltese were crate trained and slept in it in our bedroom in the crate. Back then we travelled a lot and when we would leave our hotel room they would get in the crate and sleep.

Dogs actually like having a private space. Many would nap in it when the door was open during the day. My son’s 80 lb dog squeezed himself into the crate once that was only big enough for my 4 Maltese. I was worried about getting him out but decided to see if he could figure it out because he somehow got in there. It took about a hour but he did and he never did that again.

Now that I live alone and don’t travel with the dogs I let the two of them sleep with me. I have many funny stories with my pets throughout the years.
 
"I’m not letting my dog bite a child."
Of course not. But in our house our pets are more important than friends or their children or grandchildren. They just would have to stay out.
 
George1959 said:
"I’m not letting my dog bite a child."
Of course not. But in our house our pets are more important than friends or their children or grandchildren. They just would have to stay out.
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I wouldn’t lock up my dogs because a guest doesn’t like them. However, I love to have my friends over and if a dog is trying to bite them I will definitely put them in another room. I have a friend that rescued a chi that bites and this is what she does also.
 
I agree with @Pepper ! Do not put them up anywhere! If the can afford to travel to NC to visit their son's family, they can afford & should make their own accommodations while visiting you. And, I would not let them come over bright and early. You set the time when they can come back. They sure are taking advantage of you.
 
Pepper said:
Cut those relatives lose, OR tell them your rules in advance. Let them stay at a nearby motel. Your dog is more important. I'm shocked at their rudeness to your pup. Rude, unbelievably rude to annoy a member of your family.
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I agree....Please respect our senior-aged dog (call her by name). Understand she is set in her ways, she does have feelings, and she's very beloved here.

If they prefer to stay at a motel, I'd offer to pay for the room, or half if I couldn't afford the whole thing or if they chose a different motel...but they should pay for any extras.
 
Della said:
Thanks for all your support! I thought at least some of you would side with them.
Yay pet people!

We never invite them, they just call and say they're coming.

A few years ago we started putting them up, at our expense, at a local Holiday Inn
since we don't have a spare bedroom and we were tired of asking our son to sleep on the couch.
We thought that that would discourage them, but I think it made things worse.

They stay with us until we're half asleep and then come back
bright and very early in the morning.

We will be sure to keep our girl safe on our own laps while they're here though.
Click to expand...
Oh. Rethinking my comment. (#21)
 
Murrmurr said:
I agree....Please respect our senior-aged dog (call her by name). Understand she is set in her ways, she does have feelings, and she's very beloved here.

If they prefer to stay at a motel, I'd offer to pay for the room, or half if I couldn't afford the whole thing or if they chose a different motel...but they should pay for any extras.
Click to expand...
why should Della offer to pay any of it.. she doesn't invite these people..they invite themselves.
 
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