Is there power in old age?

Army posted me to Korea 1998-2000. It was a command sponsored billet and my wife was authorized to accompany me. At the time, I was in my late 50s and Linda was bumping up on 60.

We used public transportation for moving about off post in Seoul. First question our Korean hosts would always politely ask was "How old you?" At first it was a bit off-putting. But came to realize the Korean society attaches much respect to the aging. Because of our ages were close to 60 we were given special consideration for seating and many times the younger would offer their seats in a sign to deference to our age. And the many places we visited, we were treated special because we were aging.

I'm not sure that equates to 'power', per se. In retrospect we did not feel entitled or empowered. We felt humbled by the respect we received.
By contrast, and after returning stateside and retiring, feel irrelevant. Difference in social acceptance, I guess.
 

Last edited:
I don't think I'm any wiser than when I was younger. I'm dumber is some ways. Losing brain cells does that. So I don't expect any special treatment just because I'm old. If I've been talked down to, I'm too stupid to notice. I generally find that if I treat others with respect, they treat me the same.

Why should I have any special power just because I've survived longer? It was mostly dumb luck.
 
I guess so much of it is how you were raised. Values you saw in your own life as a child. For me, if some family was ill or in trouble, you helped in whatever way you could. This often meant taking in an ill relative or the children until they were well.

In my husband's family it was the same. There was one Aunt, who was a nurse. She went to each family when there was a surgery, illness, new baby etc. I saw it in my then 16 year old boyfriend taking his Grandmother and great Aunt to early Mass on Sunday mornings. What 16 year old boy is willing to get up, put on a tie and sport coat to escort the elders in the family to church? Let's just say I knew he was a catch then.

My own son, saw it in his informative years. Moving his grandmother to live just around the corner so we could help out. Watching me take care of his Dad when he got cancer, learning to accept he may have to do without the attention he normally got so I could cover the household needs and his Dad's physical requirements.

Me, moving my Mom in to our home when she could no longer live alone. Seeing first hand the love and respect I gave her. That when we get older we need help with doctors, meals, medication, personal care, baths, haircuts, nail trims and sometimes diaper changes.

He saw this yet again when I took in a dear family friend after an amputation due to diabetes. He did not want to go to a rehab center and I understood. He came and stayed with me for 4 months of recovery. Same thing, cooked his meals. That was hard as I had no experience with a diabetic diet but I figured it out and he was a big guy. He never went hungry and got proper nutrition. I took him for all his doctor appointments. It was the best he had ever done, lost weight and his A1C holding at 5.1 when he went home.

It seems to me that we often don't give credit to younger generations. I can't do that. I think much of the fault falls to the examples that the generations before have not taught them better by example. There are so many of our generation that were driven by money, the need to feel important, finding their value in material things. A thing is just a thing, a person is a person, always remember a thing can't love you back. A thing can be replaced, a person can't!
 
There's "power" if you want to get a job like mine. Those "nobody wants to work" jobs are begging for warm bodies that are dependable and willing to get the job done. I'm the oldest employee in our store, but my older colleagues are close to me in age, starting from about age 70. It's rare that any of us call out "sick," and for sure none of us have ever just not shown up for a shift. Management loves us.

As for teens and other younger folks? They might dis me behind my back, but they treat me with respect and deference in person.
 
Seniors have power but they have to work harder to exercise it / to be heard. That takes strength and energy that some of us no longer have.
 
Yes we have 'power' (not a good word but can't think of an alternative). We have the power to love don't we? We have the power to help, to care.

I give of myself to people who need help in whatever way I can by volunteering. It's within my 'power' to help them.

And if I'm not doing that but just going about my own life, I can honestly say I've never felt invisible nor ignored.

Question:
Who or what makes people feel invisible or ignored? Do you mean, family, when out and about, or from our society in general?
 
The longer we live the more we learn, at least most of us.

This knowledge coupled with our life experience is power. Those that do not recognize this miss out on a lot.

I know in my lifetime, most of what I learned, that had great value to me, came from my elders...
 


Back
Top