My Dear Ole Mom

Beezer

Beezer

Senior Member
When I was a boy there was a lake you could walk on in the Winter to take the shortcut to school.

Mom always told me that she had a friend who lived in an apartment right by the lake and would look out her window and could tell if we had been on that lake.

Well, one day it was so cold that the ice froze and there was a large tractor on the lake. I figured it was safe and guided me and my little sister behind the plow...taking the shortcut to school.

When I got home, Mom immediately said, "You were on the lake today! My friend saw you!" I sheepishly admitted to it, but told Mom there was even a giant snow plow on the lake...that it was safe.

Years later Mom told me there was no friend that lived by the lake. She had just made it up because she was concerned for our safety. And it was a total fluke...that ONE day she accused me of being on the lake...I was.

Mom is 87 years old now and lives in an elderly care facility for dementia patients. I still tell her all of the creative stories of when she was in her prime and she just laughs and says, "Really??"
 

I had a golf membership when I was 17 and this one overcast day I teamed up with these 3 men in their 40's.

I was just a kid, but felt I held my own in the conversation department throughout the round. Yep, I was on the cusp of becoming a responsible young man. That was...until...

As we teed off on the 17th hole, my partner looked up and said, "What the Hell is that?!"

It was a mad woman running down the middle of the fairway right towards us in a housecoat and slippers with a giant purple umbrella yelling, "PATRICK! YOU GET IN THE CAR RIGHT NOW BEFORE YOU GET STRUCK BY LIGHTING!!"

I sheepishly cheeped to the other golfers, "Er...that's my Mom."

Mom had spotted me from the parking lot and came after me. It was a hugely embarrassing moment for me, but as the years passed I realized it was all out of love and concern.
 
Mom could never stand anyone with body odor. It really was her pet peeve.

One day at the Pharmacy, a man walked by her in the aisle reeking of BO. Mom grabbed a stick of deodorant and when he wasn't looking she placed it in his shopping cart! :LOL:

Again, I tell Mom these great stories and she just giggles and says, "Really??"
 


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