The General Humor Thread

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Concert Humor #6 Tiny Tim
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Yes Tiny Tim. I saw him and Bobby "Boris" Pickett (Monster Mash) at a concert titled 30 Years of Rock and Roll. There were other performers also.
Tiny Tim had just finished singing Tiptoe Thru the Tulips. The emcee, Donnie Brooks, who was a one hit wonder with Mission Bell, told Tiny that concert was called Thirty Years of Rock and Roll, and he wouldn't let him leave the stage until he sang rock and roll. So instead Tiny Tim sang Rod Stewart's Do You Think I'm Sexy. Try to visualize that in your mind. 😆
 
Concert Humor #7 The Spaniels Last one.
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They were the last of 7 bands to perform at an oldies doo wop concert. The bass singer Gerald Gregory had been drinking all evening. By the time the Spaniels came out, he was totally crocked. We in the audience thought he'd trip over all of the wires. They finished singing a song & he started wandering around the stage in his own little world. You could tell lead singer Pookie Hudson was really pissed off. The band started playing their biggest hit Goodnight Sweetheart Goodnight. Pookie looked around and called to him, because the bass singer starts the song. Although he was drunk as a skunk, he ran to the front of the stage, and sang on cue.
 
A man and a woman had been married for more than 60 years. They had shared everything. They had kept no secrets from each other except that the little old woman had a shoe box in the top of her closet that she had cautioned her husband never to open or ask her about.

For all of these years, he had never thought about the box, but one day the little old woman got very sick and the doctor said she would not recover. In trying to sort out their affairs, the little old man took down the shoe box and took it to his wife's bedside.

She agreed that it was time that he should know what was in the box. When he opened it, he found two crocheted dolls and a stack of money totaling $95,000. He asked her about the contents.

"When we were to be married," she said, "my grandmother told me the secret of a happy marriage was to never argue. She told me that if I ever got angry with you, I should just keep quiet and crochet a doll."

The little old man was so moved; he had to fight back tears. Only two precious dolls were in the box. She had only been angry with him two times in all those years of living and loving. He almost burst with happiness.

"Honey," he said "that explains the doll, but what about all of this money? Where did it come from?"

"Oh, that?" she said. "That's the money I made from selling the dolls."
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Marriage sux. Haha .....
 

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