I had to sleep in my bed the last half of my rest. We talked about getting a chair last night. It might soon come to that...as @Gary O' says "things will work themselves out."
I second that.I had cervical spine surgery, the pain I had before the surgery was unbearable. The surgery was from c-1 to c-7. Some parts were fused some were pinned with titanium rods. Use of my left arm & hand disappeared, so therapy was supposed to be the solution. The therapist told me it can take up to a year to fully recover muscle nerve damage.
I suspect the surgeon that did my surgery was a D level surgeon. A year later still no use & muscle tone had depleted to a step above zero. I say the surgeon was probably a D level because his fix left my spine with severe nerve compression between c-3 & c-6.
I live with no use of my left arm & hand other than making the hand a nice flat surface for carrying plates to the sink after eating. I've gotten used to the constant level 3 pain. Lucky for me the sensory nerves that transmit that pain are still intact
My only reason for describing this is to ask you to do your research about any surgeon you may use to help you.
Paco Dennis bad things happen to both good and bad people.
Wonderful that you have started a journal. Writing things down can be very healing. I wish you all the best
That's too weird. Thanks for the reminder though. I really try to keep it in mind, but sometimes I get self centered when I feel bad and/or afraid. Also thanks for the encouragement to continue this.
Thanks Ed..... "Riders on the Storm".
I was 54.
Pavo, that is very interesting about you being a monk. My late fiancé Sifuphil, whom I met here on sf, was a Taoist monk. Obviously, he left that behind.
We called all them "Jeepers". Then we had to transform the cottage overhang into a night house and "yard "for them in a protected place. That took a lot of work. We put chicken wire all around and mounted a screen door.
The "inner" chamber is where they roosted. We put two long "roosting branches inside and that had a door with a easy lock and a ramp with a sliding door to go in and out. There was a resident ground hog who's stomping ground was inside the inner chamber. We tried to make it leave by putting a garden house and flush him out but that didn't work. I put broken glass, barbed wire , the hottest Jalapeno peppers that were to hot for us to eat, and and a fake big snake. That got rid of it. 
Here are some them grown up. We got about 14 eggs per day. We occasionally had one for supper.
Now we planned to feed the chickens the worms from the worm farm but they wouldn't eat them. But, it wasn't long until another idea came to farmer Misa....
You're a gifted musician, so you've had some good along with the bad. Some people only have bad, some only have good, it seems. It's all just random luck of the draw. Our bodies just seem to wear out at a certain point and there's not much we can do about it. Even the rich have to deal with that fact of life. Steve Jobs was only 56 years old when he died, and he was a multi-billionaire.Yep I know. I don't label people good and/or bad. The title of the diary is a sort of self-pity attitude. Like..."How come this happened to me?" "This isn't fair!" "I should be able to be my healthier self, like I used to be."...none of those sentiments are special to "me". I am very aware of that. BUT, it becomes hard for us humans when something we dislike shows upon our doorstep. I thought about changing the title to " Why do things happen to people."
We refurbished the other side of the cottage/chicken pen. We made three pens out of pallets we got from the Universities farm nearby. In about 7 months she ( Binki ) had some piglets.
They loved rooting and eating all kinds of everything. They clear the ground, then you have to move the pens. It took awhile to figure out how to keep them in their pens. Here a couple of them lifting up heavy cattle panels and slipping right out to freedom. 
We raised up to 24 at one point. We slaughtered and butchered them ourselves. We had meat year round, and a few real nice barbeques. This is Frida that finally could get a bite out of this huge pumpkin.
If you would like to know about this breed here is a good site. ( The picture of the male hog on the page looks almost identical to ours ( named him Banker ).
I have arthritis in my neck and fusion of a couple of vertebrae.
