Women who constantly seek to be desirable to men

R

Rose65

Senior Member
Location
United Kingdom
I don't respect such women. We all know them, the ones who set store by their figures and beauty status alone, even in old age. Trying to defy time.

What is that? It's encouraged by TV and media, as if life is primarily about sexuality and desirability. Oh I was intent enough in youth of worrying about men finding me attractive and I basked in it when they did. Now I am old and I think I grew up. I really don't care and I see the absurdity of it.

So how important is attractiveness to the opposite sex in mature years? Surely it is programmed in us as a necessary spur to reproduction rather than a perpetual preoccupation.
 

The rituals we have for dating and mating are involved. We are programmed to do what our culture does to mate. Part of that IS attracting a man. However it's done is not the point. It has to be done. Like in nature, we have it to understand this. After mating and the hormones' start leaving there is little use for those rituals or attitudes. There is transition and some there is none, but most it takes some time to cool the jets. I have to say that it's about the birds and the bees. :)
 
Rose65 said:
I don't respect such women. We all know them, the ones who set store by their figures and beauty status alone, even in old age. Trying to defy time.
Click to expand...
Can't beat Mother Nature and Father Time... they invented the game. If you're older and look in the mirror and see a young sexy vixen... well that's great and fabulous for self esteem... but do it for yourself... not for "catching a man." 🤷‍♀️
 
Last edited:
In my journey through life I came across a certain type of woman occasionally. This was one who had made herself a kind of escort for usually lonely wealthy businessmen. These she would hunt out by joining golf clubs and frequenting stylish bars. I strongly suspect this type never slept with them and there were set unspoken rules.
Her part was to look good and be excellent sparkling company. She wouldn't be young but mature and intelligent. Slim, elegant and well spoken, she would adorn the arm of any generous wealthy man, often very ugly but intelligent successful older men, to functions, dinner, theatre. She was suitable to fit into any social occasion as a 'friend'. In return he would have wonderful company and he would shower her with gifts, hotel stays, always discreetly in separate rooms. She would enjoy a high standard of life all paid for. Travel and the best of everything included.

These women left their self respect behind but were not prostitutes in a coarse sense. They simply knew the rules and played the part. They lived a life far above domesticity and the daily grind of most of us, being wined, dined and admired. Not for them to look after a man and a home, to cook and clean.

I found that very sad though and never envied it. Theirs was a sad life in important ways, a shallow cynical way to sample the finer things in life.
 
CallMeKate said:
You are very right here, Rose. And so many of them *think* they look fabulous and enjoy showing themselves off... but they're the only one who sees it and others simply see their age. Can't beat Mother Nature and Father Time... they invented the game. If you're old and look in the mirror and see a young sexy vixen... well that's great and fabulous for self esteem... but don't go thinkin' that others see the same. 🤷‍♀️
Click to expand...
I think they don't have the respect of other women.
 
Rose65 said:
In my journey through life I came across a certain type of woman occasionally. This was one who had made herself a kind of escort for usually lonely wealthy businessmen. These she would hunt out by joining golf clubs and frequenting stylish bars. I strongly suspect this type never slept with them and there were set unspoken rules.
Her part was to look good and be excellent sparkling company. She wouldn't be young but mature and intelligent. Slim, elegant and well spoken, she would adorn the arm of any generous wealthy man, often very ugly but intelligent successful older men, to functions, dinner, theatre. She was suitable to fit into any social occasion as a 'friend'. In return he would have wonderful company and he would shower her with gifts, hotel stays, always discreetly in separate rooms. She would enjoy a high standard of life all paid for. Travel and the best of everything included.

These women left their self respect behind but were not prostitutes in a coarse sense. They simply knew the rules and played the part. They lived a life far above domesticity and the daily grind of most of us, being wined, dined and admired. Not for them to look after a man and a home, to cook and clean.

I found that very sad though and never envied it. Theirs was a sad life in important ways, a shallow cynical way to sample the finer things in life.
Click to expand...
I think it is known as an "escort service".
 
Rose65 said:
So how important is attractiveness to the opposite sex in mature years?
Click to expand...
Not

Of course it's important too look presentable

I like the natural woman

Makeup......WHOA!
It takes on a whole other direction in the later years

Less is more in the spackle dept
(Might be poor eyesight)

Too much lipstick and the Joker emerges

Then there's the continuously surprised (Pelosi brows) look

brows.jpg

Just back off a bit on the makeup
Us ol' guys can't see anyway
 
Last edited:
Gary O' said:
Not

Of course it's important too look presentable

I like the natural woman

Makeup......WHOA!
It takes on a whole other direction in the later years

Less is more in the spackle dept
(Might be poor vision)

Too much lipstick and the Joker emerges

Then there's the continuously surprised (Pelosi brows) look

View attachment 337583

Just back off a bit on the makeup
Us ol' guys can't see anyway
Click to expand...
Agree completely. Less IS best when it comes to make up.
IMG_4075.jpeg


IMG_4076.jpeg
 
DebraMae said:
I think it dates back to the days when women felt they had to "catch" and then "keep" a man.
Click to expand...
Well when you consider that historically women had no decent options if they were unattached, it's not surprising that women had to operate like that. I think though in these last few years, maybe that's changing a lot as I've read that more and more young women are choosing to stay single and more older women are finding their peace and happiness as singles.
 
I get what everyone means about fish lips and face distortions from plastic surgery and botox. Yes, they have a distorted sense of reality and self image, and "constantly" is bad but...

Aside from that level of distortion, how does anyone know if an aging woman is trying to look more attractive to men? Maybe a woman just wants to take care of her appearance to feel good about herself. Or just feel as though she fits in with her friends who are taking good care of themselves. Maybe it's important in order to keep a job when in the public eye? We just don't know.

I've never had anything done but if I see someone who has and she looks better and is happier then I'm just happy for her. I do feel sad for those who get a botched job done, go in to have it fixed and comes out worse. There needs to be more regulations on the surgeons etc.
 
Last edited:
Debrah N. said:
Well when you consider that historically women had no decent options if they were unattached, it's not surprising that women had to operate like that. I think though in these last few years, maybe that's changing a lot as I've read that more and more young women are choosing to stay single and more older women are finding their peace and happiness as singles.
Click to expand...
Yes, we have options now that weren't available in the past.
 
I don't think things are simple.

If you take yourself out to the meat market to draw suitors for relationships or just some good times until you accumulate enough options to throw out discards... the "cuts" of meat that present the best, perhaps with chemical enhancement to look fresher, or in more appealing packaging, are probably going to be chosen first. Then the shoppers have to consider their budgets vs the price of a piece of meat.

The meat market economy just works that way. Both sides of the economy have their advantaged opportunists... as well as the submarket of the "reduced" aisle. Some end up as ground meat, Bologna, and hot dogs - that shoppers of modest means settle for if even lucky enough to afford those prices.

Alternatives do exist where minds, hearts, interests, goals, and ambitions can be explored and evaluated before images or even heights are considered. That can save some from the hot dog stuffer or worse the hog feed plant. Such venues can be rare though and I can't conceive of a local option besides traditional blind dating.
 
In earlier times there existed much more uncomfortable ways for women of the upper class to be attractive for the opposite s.x. I'm thinking of corsets for a small waist in Western cultures and the even harmful practice of footbinding in China to obtain a "golden lotus" in the extreme.
 
dilettante said:
If you take yourself out to the meat market to draw suitors for relationships or just some good times until you accumulate enough options to throw out discards... the "cuts" of meat that present the best, perhaps with chemical enhancement to look fresher, or in more appealing packaging, are probably going to be chosen first. Then the shoppers have to consider their budgets vs the price of a piece of meat
Click to expand...

Meat market? "Cuts" of meat? Budgets vs price of a piece of meat? Submarket? Reduced aisle?
Sorry, dude, but this post was kind of bizarre. Just my own opinion, of course... but a woman isn't a piece of meat that men shop for... oh, I could say so much more. But I won't.
 
To address the initial question of the thread, my thought is that if a woman is only dressing and presenting herself as a physical body to attract the opposite sex, then that is basically saying that this is what she thinks she has to offer in a relationship.
And if she finds a man that is attracted to her only for her physical beauty and appearance , then she has to continually worry that he will find a nicer attraction and she will lose him.

On the other hand, I think that trying to look your best, to please yourself ,is a good thing. It does not have to mean that you are trying to lure someone in, just because you dress nice or wear makeup.
I am totally pleased when someone tells me that I look nice, whether it is a man or a woman who says it, and it gives me a nice little self-worth boost. I like men, and I like getting compliments, and I like to look nice for my husband, too.
 
CallMeKate said:
Meat market? "Cuts" of meat? Budgets vs price of a piece of meat? Submarket? Reduced aisle?
Sorry, dude, but this post was kind of bizarre. Just my own opinion, of course... but a woman isn't a piece of meat that men shop for... oh, I could say so much more. But I won't.
Click to expand...
Believe me, I was not advocating for that.

The point I tried to make is that far less superficial alternatives exist, they just don't have enough support and accessibility within our culture. Part of that might be due to where the corporate profits are made.

But I clearly failed in trying to make a sympathetic point in relation to the original post.
 
dilettante said:
But I clearly failed in trying to make a sympathetic point in relation to the original post.
Click to expand...
'Tis okay... it's easy to be misunderstood in a forum, I guess. I was just attacked in another thread for something that I didn't even understand why it happened. I suppose the guy didn't understand what I'd meant, but it's still a jolt when it happens. Soooo.... carry on, Sir @dilettante :giggle: (y)
 


Back
Top