Trust issues

P

pleinmont

Member
Location
UK
I am of the opinion you should never trust anyone unless you have good reason to do so. We hear time and time again how some people are taken in by scams.

This is my story of which I am very ashamed.:oops:

Nearly 20 years ago I met a Christian woman from Florida on-line. I was stupid enough to fall for her sob story. If she had actually asked me for money I would have been suspicious, but she was cleverer than that. I sent her approx £1000 in American dollars. When she realised no more would be forthcoming, she made an excuse to fallout with me. I discovered other posters had been as daft as I had been, and parted with their cash. Since then I have never trusted anyone I have only met on-line. I only trust people I know in person if they have proved themselves to be good, decent people.

Have other posters been taken for a ride?
 

No , fortunately I haven't , I'm lucky I've been able to see through people and not been affected, but I could see how easily it could happen as it did to you, with someone gaining your trust and you being very kind and wishing to help. I'm so sorry that happened to you... and it's a hard lesson to learn.
 
hollydolly said:
No , fortunately I haven't , I'm lucky I've been able to see through people and not been affected, but I could see how easily it could happen as it did to you, with someone gaining your trust and you being very kind and wishing to help. I'm so sorry that happened to you... and it's a hard lesson to learn.
Click to expand...

As you can imagine my family weren't impressed by my stupidity, particularly my husband. I told my story on a Saturday morning radio programme for which I was interviewed. I thought it was important to warn others to beware.
 

Last edited:
My parents were conned out of several thousand dollars. Red flags need to go up as soon as someone seeks funds from you on line via a hard luck story; religion, as someone once memorably said, can be the last refuge of a scoundrel. As Fox Mulder was advised, "Trust no one." If you do trust, first verify...
 
You won't believe this, but the woman who conned me, contacted me about 10 years later claiming she had arrived in London, and had lost her handbag. She wanted me to lend her £2000, which she would pay back? After telling her exactly what I thought of her, I blocked her e-mail address.
 
pleinmont said:
You won't believe this, but the woman who conned me, contacted me about 10 years later claiming she had arrived in London, and had lost her handbag. She wanted me to lend her £2000, which she would pay back? After telling her exactly what I thought of her, I blocked her e-mail address.
Click to expand...
WoW, once a conman/woman..always a conman . :mad: I presume you didn't have enough evidence to get the police involved?
 
hollydolly said:
WoW, once a conman/woman..always a conman . :mad: I presume you didn't have enough evidence to get the police involved?
Click to expand...

To be frank I couldn't be bothered, having other much more important issues with which to concern myself. I was much more fed up that she had taken me for a ride, than the money I had given her, which wasn't that much really.
 
Not exactly about your post, but I had a dear long time penpal and at one point I kept complaining to him about my lack of money to solve a problem I had. Finally he offered to give me some money. It was then I realized that from his side of the fence it sounded like I was hoping for him to offer. I was so ashamed, I had not realized how I had sounded to him, and I assured him I was just venting, getting my frustration off my chest. I thanked him profusely for the offer and refused the gift. After that I never mentioned money again.

Never lend money unless you're willing to lose it, even to friends and family members.
 
Catlady said:
Never lend money unless you're willing to lose it, even to friends and family members.
Click to expand...

So true. Back around 1975, a dear friend called me to ask if she could borrow $500. Her mother was gravely ill and her doctor could only run certain tests if the family paid for them; her insurance didn't cover them. $500 was a lot of money to me, but I went ahead and lent it to her.

Many months went by with no word. A little over a year later I called her up and told her I needed my money back. She sounded surprised on the phone (???), but promptly sent a check. (Did she think I forgot?)

That I had to reach out to her to get the money back was a lesson I never forgot. That was the only time I lent anyone a significant amount of money. As my husband has told people who've asked us for loans, "I'm your friend, not your bank."

p.s. My friend's mother recovered.
 
pleinmont said:
I am of the opinion you should never trust anyone unless you have good reason to do so. We hear time and time again how some people are taken in by scams.

This is my story of which I am very ashamed.:oops:

Nearly 20 years ago I met a Christian woman from Florida on-line. I was stupid enough to fall for her sob story. If she had actually asked me for money I would have been suspicious, but she was cleverer than that. I sent her approx £1000 in American dollars. When she realised no more would be forthcoming, she made an excuse to fallout with me. I discovered other posters had been as daft as I had been, and parted with their cash. Since then I have never trusted anyone I have only met on-line. I only trust people I know in person if they have proved themselves to be good, decent people.

Have other posters been taken for a ride?
Click to expand...
One key word in your post: "Christian." People who are too hung up on religion are easy targets for scams because they confuse "Christian" with "Decent," "Good," "Moral," etc. Con artists are well aware of this. We know what happens when parents trust priests with their kids.
 
Well, clearly she wasn't a very good "Christian" or she wouldn't have stolen your money. Heck, she might not even have been a "she" for all you know. I learned my lessons about trust when I was a kid because of several experiences. And when money is involved? Oh, hell no! Having said that, I know a few, but only a few, people I would trust with anything I had. But some stranger on line? No way!!
 
I don't think it's a question of trusting too easily. People care for people they like. That's not exactly a bad trait. And as far as being an easy mark, anybody can be scammed. I could tell you that I'm the widow of Lt. Steven J. Ford, USN, who was killed in Afghanistan, last year. And why wouldn't you believe me? I wouldn't beat myself up for falling for a scam.
BTW, I agree with win231. Using "Christian" is a tool for gaining trust. One of my own homemade mottoes is never trust anyone, who makes his living off religion.
 
StarSong said:
Many months went by with no word. A little over a year later I called her up and told her I needed my money back. She sounded surprised on the phone (???), but promptly sent a check. (Did she think I forgot?)
Click to expand...

You're lucky she did pay you and right away after you asked. I lent $200 to a very sweet co-worker and had to keep asking him. He finally gave me a check and when I took it to his bank in person to cash it, they said not enough in his account. I went back two more times and on third try they cashed it. This was in mid 1990's, I haven't loaned a dime since then.
 
@pleinmont
you said:
"Nearly 20 years ago I met a Christian woman from Florida on-line."

I don't know how you define "Christian", but by your own admission you never met her in person.
Let me guess: She said she was a Christian, she said she goes to church, she said she reads the bible.
:rolleyes: (...shaking my head) Those qualities apply to some of the biggest hypocrites I've known.
 
Last edited:
applecruncher said:
@pleinmont
you said:
"Nearly 20 years ago I met a Christian woman from Florida on-line."

I don't know how you define "Christian", but by your own admission you never met her in person.
Let me guess: She said she was a Christian, she said she goes to church, she said she reads the bible.
:rolleyes: (...shaking my head) Those qualities apply to some of the biggest hypocrites I've known.
Click to expand...
I agree.
 
Whenever I hear "He/she is a good Christian" or any statement about how good someone is, based on their religion, I have to chuckle. I immediately think of scam artists & thieves like the Reverend Jesse Jackson, Jimmy Swaggart, Jim & Tammy Bakker, etc.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Back
Top