How many single men turn down the chance of relationship with married woman?

Gardenlover said:
Do you equate "Enlightened" as a blank check, no holds barred free for all?
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No, not those things quite, (I assume you equate stealing someone's wife with a quote, "licence to steal, corrupt or be immoral"). I think I've said often enough on this thread I'm against the further relaxation of divorce laws going through our UK parliament right now, ignoring the deep reservations of backbenchers, whilst at the same time acknowledging divorce is necessary, (" just don't make it too easy", and undermine marriage vows until they become meaningless). :censored:.
 

When I was married I was approached by a few single guys who wanted to have an affair with me. Some of them I would happily have gone with if I had been single. But I was married so I said absolutely not!
Apparently, my husband had been having affairs throughout our marriage. He eventually owned up to this and I said ok, we’ll work this out if you behave from now on. But then he had another affair, so I said that’s it, out you go. If you want to play around with multiple people, just don’t get married! It’s as simple as that.
 
Don't you guys ever watch "Forensic Files?" ROFLMAO
My position has been and continues to be: If you want to fool around have enough respect for yourself and your spouse to address the underlying problem. If it is irreparable, divorce before having that "fling."
 

grahamg said:
I've been told, and witnessed, those who choose to leave, or cheat on one partner or spouse, repeat the behaviour quite often, (what do they say about "getting your retaliation in first"?).
A friend of mine, who was the first woman I met through internet dating, and she figured out within the short meeting at a bar, we were not suited. However, most unexpectedly she turned into a good friend afterwards, even when she met a great guy " the normal way", through attending events their respective children were involved in. Anyway, this woman would not entertain any man who had cheated on their wife/partner as she believed they were bound to do the same to her, if the going got tough, as she was pretty astute! ;) .
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That's a smart woman with healthy boundaries that she enforces.

I'm not one to retaliate by repeating what I detest. I know my worth, his loss, not mine.
 
LindaB said:
Don't you guys ever watch "Forensic Files?" ROFLMAO
My position has been and continues to be: If you want to fool around have enough respect for yourself and your spouse to address the underlying problem. If it is irreparable, divorce before having that "fling."
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Do people really behave in that way, "in the real world", (a phrase my ex. used during discussions surrounding my contact with our daughter, in a perfect world I'd have gotten to see her, but as it isn't perfect, she had a "perfect" excuse for the influence she brought to bear on our child). I believe those who "fool around" are made that way, and will always put themselves first in every situation, but those of us who marry them bear responsibility too, for not appreciating this was in their make up, especially when it was obvious to others who tried to warn of the dangers before we married. :sneaky: .
 
hellomimi said:
That's a smart woman with healthy boundaries that she enforces.

I'm not one to retaliate by repeating what I detest. I know my worth, his loss, not mine.
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I think you do lose a little in the circumstances you describe, as you've "loved and lost", obviously, but I accept what you're saying generally. :unsure:.
 
Pecos said:
My first wife, who I divorced in 1970 because she couldn't keep her pants on, has been married six times. Granted, number five died of a heart attack, and number six was a recycled number three before he died.
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You need to watch "The six Wives of Henry Lefay"
 
grahamg said:
Do people really behave in that way, "in the real world", (a phrase my ex. used during discussions surrounding my contact with our daughter, in a perfect world I'd have gotten to see her, but as it isn't perfect, she had a "perfect" excuse for the influence she brought to bear on our child). I believe those who "fool around" are made that way, and will always put themselves first in every situation, but those of us who marry them bear responsibility too, for not appreciating this was in their make up, especially when it was obvious to others who tried to warn of the dangers before we married. :sneaky: .
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It would be nice if "people" (in my particular case I mean "men") would show that side of themselves or be honest enough to let you know being a player is in their nature. My previous husband said and did all the right things including having pre-marital counseling in which we both agreed that infidelity would be a deal breaker. Believe me, if I had had any indication I would have walked away. I was familiar with the signs from my FIRST husband whom I married at the tender age of 18. I wasn't wet behind the ears when I married the second time. I was 29 years old. I'm sure you can guess how this ended.
I agree that in most cases those people are serial cheaters.
I have been married to a wonderful man for 37 years. I guess the third time is a charm.
 
grahamg said:
No, not those things quite, (I assume you equate stealing someone's wife with a quote, "licence to steal, corrupt or be immoral"). I think I've said often enough on this thread I'm against the further relaxation of divorce laws going through our UK parliament right now, ignoring the deep reservations of backbenchers, whilst at the same time acknowledging divorce is necessary, (" just don't make it too easy", and undermine marriage vows until they become meaningless). :censored:.
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Personally, I think the laws should make it HARDER to get married than to get divorced in the US. I think a lot of people enter into marriage lightly with an attitude of, "Oh, well, I can always get divorced."
I don't think couples who fight all the time and are abusive to one another mentally, emotionally or physically should be forced to remain married. In my opinion this causes more harm to the family, especially the children. I lived through that with my parents and it was horrible for us.
 
LindaB said:
Personally, I think the laws should make it HARDER to get married than to get divorced in the US. I think a lot of people enter into marriage lightly with an attitude of, "Oh, well, I can always get divorced."
I don't think couples who fight all the time and are abusive to one another mentally, emotionally or physically should be forced to remain married. In my opinion this causes more harm to the family, especially the children. I lived through that with my parents and it was horrible for us.
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I'm told though "marriage has to be undertaken before you've got any sense, or after its all gone", (or folks wouldn't go for it at any price!). :whistle:.
 
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