Do You Tell A Friend She Could Be Making A Mistake?

I'm wondering if his wants and desires are going to change by the next week, or the next month.

Don't be so eager to meet his demands..

jmo
 

"Made her tell a lie" not good. This is offending her sensitivities. her inner conscious.
Who was it, Chet? said "Tell her to slow down". Great advise!
She might be in love. Might be a great lover. Doesn't want to give him up, and yes, it can happen this fast!
If she asked your advise, she has doubts. Listen to her feelings. She may not hear what you say.
Murrmurr said, Tell her,"I wouldn't, if it were me." More great advise!
Old Man said "What advise would you give your daughter?" Even more great advise! Some very wise men on here!
If he's a liar, he's also a thief and a cheat. He operates from the lower mind functions. She needs to know.
I need to say, IMO!
 
I met my friend S. in second grade, and we were friends ever since. She was lonely after her husband died. She went on some high school reunion site and connected with one of our old classmates. It was "love" after one weekend, she was head over heels. She let him move in with her right away. My husband was appalled, I didn't know it but he'd had some business dealings with the guy and knew him to be dishonest and not above some shady manipulations. I didn't know what to do, but my husband went right ahead and told her. She was furious with both of us and cut us dead.

Eight months later, she called my husband asking for his help to extricate her from the problems this man had created in her life. It was messy, and she ended up losing close to $30,000. But even though my husband helped her a lot, we were never really friends again. She was angry that he'd been right and she was embarrassed too.

I don't know, but I think I wish he hadn't told her, it really didn't end up doing much good.
 
She should NOT quit her job.
The guy is shady, an opportunist.
She should tell him to find another place to keep his boat/yacht AND another place to live. Give him a couple days deadline.
(He needs to look for another fool 🙄)
 
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Similar situation many years ago. In my 20's I was dating a girl who only liked to see the good in people. A couple of young women in a nearby apartment started visiting her. After meeting them, I told my girlfriend she shouldn't trust them because they were rather sleazy, they had a druggie appearance & I didn't like the way they would wander around her apartment as if they were looking for valuables. She criticized my negative attitude & said I shouldn't judge people. Since we often argued about this, I said, "OK, sometimes learning the hard way is more effective."
After a few more visits from the "Sleaze Twins," my girlfriend called me & was very upset that a pair of gold earrings I gave her were gone.
She wanted to call the police, but I told her to forget it; she would have to prove that one of them stole the earrings & proving it would be difficult because they were not going to admit it & say, "Yeah, we stole the earrings because we needed drug money."

Since I gave her the receipt for the earrings in case she wanted to exchange them for something else, she knew the earrings cost $100.00 & she felt terrible, but I told her it was a cheap price for a valuable lesson.
 
I would research the man online and If I found anything concrete to tell her, I certainly would. If it ruined the friendship, I would still feel I had done the right thing.
 
1.when asked


2. after one phone call he invited himself over

3. he has made her tell a lie to our park office

4.relocate here and move in with her. All these plans in a few days.


What I get out of your post.

#1 you were asked for your opinion give it.

2.3.4. all red flags she should be thinking about.

You asked for opinions here's mine

Way to controlling in such a short time. Your friend needs to evaluate her needs against his wants & make a choice based on her own judgement
 
Della said:
I would research the man online and If I found anything concrete to tell her, I certainly would. If it ruined the friendship, I would still feel I had done the right thing.
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Just a FYI. Many of those online "Background Check" sites just take money & provide the same info that anyone can find online for free.
I tested a couple of them with someone I know has a criminal record. Both sites only provided partial information I could get without their help.
I demanded refunds, & got them after arguing & threatening to report them to the Better Business Bureau.
 
I was gone for most of the day yesterday but another neighbor or two informed me that the yacht came in and now sits in the storage yard. The yacht is a 24 year old scow.

Also a U haul truck came in loaded to the hilt, so I guess my "take it easy" words fell on deaf ears.

The thing that really makes me mad is this woman chose to ignore the fact when she came over to tell me that the boyfriend is from a hot spot area in Ontario for covid, more cases than anywhere else in Canada.

She will not be getting past my door again. How dare she risk anyone else's health.
 
Lee said:
The thing that really makes me mad is this woman chose to ignore the fact when she came over to tell me that the boyfriend is from a hot spot area in Ontario for covid, more cases than anywhere else in Canada.

She will not be getting past my door again. How dare she risk anyone else's health.
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To be honest, I don't understand why you would let anyone in your door, or to remain within six feet of it. Your home and the portal leading to it are your personal safety zones. Nobody should be in those zones unless you've prearranged very specific guidelines that both parties have agreed to.

Marry in haste, repent at leisure - or in this case: shack up in haste, repent at leisure - will likely apply here. Let's just hope he doesn't run through her assets.

You did what you could, @Lee. Some people have to learn lessons the hard way.
 
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Sorry, when someone asks what do you think about X moving in, it's a pretty good guess they are telling you X is moving in. People only take advice , if they agree with it. Also, when it comes to affairs of the heart, you can't judge someone else's choice, by your biases, and experiences. That is a no win situation.
 

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