A verry happy Un-Christmas post- thread to the rest of us. (and Festivus of course.)

[]Doo[]Der

POOPER
Location
niagara
canstock19404256.jpg
Since the true meaning seems to have escaped our -uh- your annual celebration, and since many don't celebrate this 'holiday', and since those in that category need a place to go,to perhaps scoff a little, to simply express some disdain for the season, here's the place.
If it offends you just say MERRY CHRISTMAS -Happy Chanukah- Kwanzaa-or Festivus in your own celebratory way.
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So happy Festivus and off we go Grinch -Pogo and all.

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Festivus
, a well-celebrated parody, has become a secular holiday celebrated on December 23 that serves as an alternative to participating in the pressures and commercialism of the Christmas season.[SUP][1][/SUP] Originally a family tradition of scriptwriter Dan O'Keefe, who worked on the American sitcom Seinfeld, the holiday entered popular culture after it was made the focus of a 1997 episode of the program.[SUP][1][/SUP][SUP][2][/SUP] The holiday's celebration, as it was shown on Seinfeld, includes a Festivus dinner, an unadorned aluminum Festivus pole, practices such as the "Airing of Grievances" and "Feats of Strength", and the labeling of easily explainable events as "Festivus miracles".[SUP][3][/SUP]

The episode refers to it as "a Festivus for the rest of us", referencing its non-commercial aspect. It has also been described both as a "parody holiday festival" and as a form of playful consumer resistance.[SUP][4][/SUP]
 

SILVER SELLS--SILVER SELLS (XMAS TIME IN THE CITY)

Contributed by pooper
Topic: Holiday Poetry
TIMELY PARODY


SILVER SELLS

Silver Sells, silver sells,
It's purchasing time in the city.
Bling-a-Bling, registers ring,
Using our plastic to pay.

City street fights,
Coppers flash lights,
blink a bright red and white,
As the muggers go home
with our treasures.

Hear your teeth crunch,
See the bills bunch,
This is Satan's big scheme,
And above all his hustle you'll hear:

Silver sells, silver sells,
It's purchasing time in the city.
Bling-a-bling, registers ring,
Soon it will be time to pay.



11324613-santa-claus-cash.jpg




Pooper

 
A Pogo Christmas

Pogo Christmas Walt Kelly wrote "Boston Charlie"

Deck us all with Boston Charlie,
Walla Walla, Wash., an' Kalamazoo!
Nora's freezin' on the trolley,
Swaller dollar cauliflower alley-garoo!


Don't we know archaic barrel
Lullaby Lilla Boy, Louisville Lou?
Trolley Molly don't love Harold,
Boola boola Pensacoola hullabaloo!


Bark us all bow-wows of folly,
Polly wolly cracker 'n' too-da-loo!
Donkey Bonny brays a carol,
Antelope Cantaloupe, 'lope with you!

Hunky Dory's pop is lolly,
Gaggin' on the wagon, Willy, folly go through!
Chollie's collie barks at Barrow,
Harum scarum five alarm bung-a-loo!

Dunk us all in bowls of barley,
Hinky dinky dink an' polly voo!
Chilly Filly's name is Chollie,
Chollie Filly's jolly chilly view halloo!

Bark us all bow-wows of folly,
Double-bubble, toyland trouble! Woof, woof, woof!
Tizzy seas on melon collie!
Dibble-dabble, scribble-scrabble! Goof, goof, goof!



pogo.gif



 

SILVER SELLS--SILVER SELLS (XMAS TIME IN THE CITY)

Contributed by pooper
Topic: Holiday Poetry
TIMELY PARODY


SILVER SELLS

Silver Sells, silver sells,
It's purchasing time in the city.
Bling-a-Bling, registers ring,
Using our plastic to pay.

City street fights,
Coppers flash lights,
blink a bright red and white,
As the muggers go home
with our treasures.

Hear your teeth crunch,
See the bills bunch,
This is Satan's big scheme,
And above all his hustle you'll hear:

Silver sells, silver sells,
It's purchasing time in the city.
Bling-a-bling, registers ring,
Soon it will be time to pay.



11324613-santa-claus-cash.jpg




Pooper


I rather like this one. :thumbsup1:
 
To Good King Wenceslas

To Good King Wenceslas. A parody à la, a Pogo Christmas

Contributed by Pooper on Saturday, December 13 2008


Christmas Food Fight

Good kinky Wench has, last looked out on a feast of edam.
When a cheese ball hit her snout, round and crisp and even.
Brightly shone her nose that night, and the pain was cru-el
Till the doctor arrived on site with his bag of to-oools


"Hey there nurse stand by me, excuse me if I'm yelling
Kinky wench can hardly see, I need to stop the swelling.
Bring me ice and crush it fine, bring me Q-tips hither
You and I got here just in time, poor Wenchy's in a diiii-ther."

Doc and nurse forth they went, up nostrils went together
Though the Wenchies loud lament, never let up ever.
"Doc the swellings stopped for now and the bleeding's better
Kinky wants to get up now, I think that we should lettttt her."


Wenchie's nose is swollen red, and very near to doubling
But by now the fondue's hot.. and the cheese is a bubbling
In her doctor's steps she trod to the fondue table.
"I cannot smell but it looks so good, I'll eat some when I'm aaaable."


Like Rudolph her nose did shine, glowing red most brightly
Swollen, like a Gouda ball, in truth it was most unsightly.
Fights with Cheese and whines are surely not for Christmas
Bless us one and all, and help clean up the chee-eeese mess.




200_s.gif

 
Good King Wenceslas called Pizza Hut to order his weekly pie.

"What kind do you want and how do you want the toppings arranged?" asked the employee.

"The same as usual," the king replied, "Deep pan, crisp and even."

Oh BOOOOO! You should be ashamed of yourself...;)
 
God enjoys a good laugh.

GOD ENJOYS A GOOD LAUGH.



There were 3 good arguments that Jesus was Black:
1. He called everyone brother
2. He liked Gospel
3. He didn't get a fair trial

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Jewish:
1. He went into His Father's business
2. He lived at home until he was 33
3. He was sure his Mother was a virgin and his Mother was sure He was God

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Italian:
1. He talked with His hands
2. He had wine with His meals
3. He used olive oil

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was a Californian:
1. He never cut His hair
2. He walked around barefoot all the time
3. He started a new religion

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was an American Indian:
1. He was at peace with nature
2. He ate a lot of fish
3. He talked about the Great Spirit
But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Irish:
1. He never got married..
2. He was always telling stories.
3. He loved green pastures.
But the most compelling evidence of all - 3 proofs that Jesus was a woman:
1. He fed a crowd at a moment's notice when there was virtually no food
2. He kept trying to get a message across to a bunch of men who just didn't get it
3. And even when He was dead, He had to get up because there was still work to do
Can I get an AMEN?








Smile, it gives your face something to do!


























 

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