Well..got a friend request from a former roommate...original "friendship" did not end well

[Marie5656]

So, this afternoon I got a friend request from someone from my past. She was a housemate from when I had my house in Rochester. At the time, I needed housemates to help with lot rent on mobile home, and other expenses. Charged a very reasonable rent...which covered utilities, etc.
Well, she lived there over a year, and often would not pay rent on time, short me, etc, Our personalities did not mesh well, but I tried to make the arraingement work.
Any way, a lot happened, and I decided to evict her, for may reasons. Never heard from her again after she moved. We did not part on good terms.
So, fast forward from 1994 to today. We have been no contact all this time...and suddenly I get the alert that she sent the request. I hesitated for a bit, and decided WTH, we will see what happens. I just find it interesting she wants to make contact. She is a few years older...eary 70s. So maybe she has mellowed. We will see.

 

[hollydolly]

So, this afternoon I got a friend request from someone from my past. She was a housemate from when I had my house in Rochester. At the time, I needed housemates to help with lot rent on mobile home, and other expenses. Charged a very reasonable rent...which covered utilities, etc.
Well, she lived there over a year, and often would not pay rent on time, short me, etc, Our personalities did not mesh well, but I tried to make the arraingement work.
Any way, a lot happened, and I decided to evict her, for may reasons. Never heard from her again after she moved. We did not part on good terms.
So, fast forward from 1994 to today. We have been no contact all this time...and suddenly I get the alert that she sent the request. I hesitated for a bit, and decided WTH, we will see what happens. I just find it interesting she wants to make contact. She is a few years older...eary 70s. So maybe she has mellowed. We will see.

well if she wants something from you, she may SEEM like she's mellowed. ...hopefully tho' I'm just being cynical...

 

[Georgiagranny]

@Marie5656 That would be me, too....just like @hollydolly! Cynical and jaded.

 

[Pinky]

Hmmmm .. this raises my suspicions for some reason .

 

[Kaila]

Oh goodness, I would be very cautious.

 

[Jeni]

i often think if i had people send requests etc i would check it out the worst that can happen is to de-friend and block.
Some people do grow and change a bit maybe not a whole lot but she may see now that the fall out was her behavior...many times as people age they reach out out of being lonely

 

[Ruthanne]

In these situations I try to be emotionally distanced so I don't get hurt again. Doesn't always work though.

 

[Aunt Bea]

 

[feywon]

Proceed with caution. Like @Jeni i know some people can grow and change, but more commonly they don't.

It could depend on why she was unreliable and incompatible with you when she rented from you. If it was me, i'd express my surprise at hearing from her. That might elicit an explanation, if not an apology for her past behavior. If a sudden unexpected life change (divorce after decadesof marriage???) was why she needed to rent a room from someone, she might have been an emotional train wreck at the time. Some people get hostile when they feel vulnerable, fragile.

I had a cyber friend i blocked twice and unblocked again both times when she asked. Second time she actually apologized Turned out she was bi-polar and off her meds. Her son and his hubby held intervention and got her back on them. I interact with her differently now, rarely talk in depth about serious topics, keep tuned in for any signs she's off meds again.

 

[Jules]

JMO, I wouldn’t tell her the city you’re living in now or your telephone number.

 

[SmoothSeas]

@Marie5656 That would be me, too....just like @hollydolly! Cynical and jaded.

me, three...

and as my grandma always used to preach 'trust your nose!'

 

[Marie5656]

Yes...proceeding with caution. If all else fails, I can block her.