Unusual rules you had to follow in your home or when visiting other people's homes

Kika said:
I have been reading and cannot respond with my contribution. Too upsetting.
But I spent many total overnights sitting at the table because I was being made to eat something that made me gag to look at.
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Kika I'm sorry you went through that too... nothing was gained from causing their own children such fear and upset, and as Remy said it could only be due to their need for absolute control
 

I will say threads like this put things into perspective.......some had it much worse and i am sorry for those folks.

I recently had a long discussion with someone whom assumed i liked items that i could care less about...... but being polite acted as if i liked when i had this item....
This person was also taught to thank people for every little thing does not think i am gracious enough to thank people more ............
I told them of my situation of faking it so ingrained still do to a point .... and I found their constant thank you....... not polite but fake and mocking .... was a real eye opener on some basic conflicts we had in our friendship
 
Remy said:
My stupid oldest brother is a JW. I guess they sucked him in. People with our background are prime targets. But the last time I ever saw him was 1985 and I've had no contact since. I did notice he still had all his 60's records like The Byrds, Buffalo Springfield, Neil Young etc. And he had a motorcycle. He's a jerk though.
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Maybe he quit them.
 

Kika said:
I have been reading and cannot respond with my contribution. Too upsetting.
But I spent many total overnights sitting at the table because I was being made to eat something that made me gag to look at.
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That's an outrage. What is wrong with people! Why would anyone who had kids want to treat their child like that?

Today while shopping, I noted an older couple getting out of a car with a boy about 8 or 9. Probably the grandparents. Having never had any, I was glad for this kid. They looked like nice people.
 
We really had no explicit rules in our house, but my mother had severe OCD and was a clean freak, so when my elementary school friends came over to play we had to stay out on the front porch (which was really a tiny tile portico with an overhang). Occasionally, she would let one of my friends inside the house if she was sure he would not mess things up.

My dad was the same, so I could never put any chewing gum wrappers in the ashtray of his car. Also, no feet on the seats, even though they were vinyl at the time.

My upbringing was all about cleanliness, which is probably why I only clean our house when I see dust or spiderwebs accumulating. My partner would never clean without the force of a cattle prod, so I think he has helped me become more balanced. I am only a neat freak about my car, so I guess that's my one outlet to perpetuate the OCD.
 
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hollydolly said:
actually further to that , my mother was very superstitious so we were not allowed to laugh in the house at all.. this is a the truth. She said it brought bad luck..''laugh before 11 cry before 7''... , so we never laughed , in case we got a hiding for bringing bad luck.... and the truth is.. I didn't know how to laugh as a child.. I had to learn how to when I grew up.. fact..
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We weren't supposed to laugh at all either; that rule was imposed by my crazy old, religious-nut grandmother: "the more unhappy you are in life, the happier you'll be in heaven--"Whom the Lord loveth, he chastizeth...Hebr. 12-6--"and the happier you are in life, the more you'll suffer in Hell."
 
Remy said:
I wasn't able to join any groups ect. Of coarse I wanted to be in the Brownie's, Girl Scouts etc. It was the thing. I was allowed one meeting and then I noted my mother standing at the door backlit by the light like Dirty Harry in the Sudden Impact movie. Interestingly filmed in Santa Cruz. I walked over to her and she started berating me "what goes on here, I don't like what I'm seeing." What she didn't like was her possession interacting with other's and out of her control. I never was allowed to go back.
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Mostly me neither; I was in Bluebirds and loved it--liked being around the nice women who were the leaders since I guess I really missed a mother's love but when it came time to join Girl Scouts which I wanted to so badly, oh no, uh uh; Dad said the uniform would cost way too much money. (He always had money for his mistress(es), though.)
 
Remy said:
My stupid oldest brother is a JW. I guess they sucked him in. People with our background are prime targets. But the last time I ever saw him was 1985 and I've had no contact since. I did notice he still had all his 60's records like The Byrds, Buffalo Springfield, Neil Young etc. And he had a motorcycle. He's a jerk though.
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My bi-polar sister joined them for a while too. My late brother was always trying marriage; he'd been married and divorced 5 times and was looking for Number 6 when he passed away last year.
 
officerripley said:
We weren't supposed to laugh at all either; that rule was imposed by my crazy old, religious-nut grandmother: "the more unhappy you are in life, the happier you'll be in heaven--"Whom the Lord loveth, he chastizeth...Hebr. 12-6--"and the happier you are in life, the more you'll suffer in Hell."
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She was out of her ever ef-ing mind! She must have been a nightmare to be around. What a whack job.
 
officerripley said:
We weren't supposed to laugh at all either; that rule was imposed by my crazy old, religious-nut grandmother: "the more unhappy you are in life, the happier you'll be in heaven--"Whom the Lord loveth, he chastizeth...Hebr. 12-6--"and the happier you are in life, the more you'll suffer in Hell."
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She and that medieval barrel-of-laughs Savonarola would have gotten along like a house afire....or a bonfire of the vanities. He preached that life was supposed to be unhappy and grim so that you'd get your reward in heaven.

At least your granny didn't burn you at the stake.....
 
hollydolly said:
Did you have any unusual rules or habits you had to follow , either in your own home growing up.. or when visiting relatives or friends then or now ?
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Not really
Standard stuff at home

Going somewhere?
I hardly ever got to go

I do have this one episode;
(posted here a few times)

Unspoken rules of which I found out the hard way



Anybody got close to near to close relatives that seem to live a cut above everone around them including you?

These are kin, that if you had the choice, you’d pick for Hitler’s cronies, their lives ending by the hand of Idi Amin’s pals.
It’s a dream you have anyway.

These are not necessarily smug folks, as they’ve been raised to be proper with kindly remarks saved for the mentally disadvantaged (you),
but still,
when in conversation, you seem to come off as a curiosity, a toy that should have been discarded but kept because, well, it’s been passed down from aged family members.

These are your kinfolks that you wish weren’t.
But there you are, at their place.
And there they are, choosing the correct fork with mindless ease, while it dawns on you that you not only have one, but both elbows on the table.
This felonious act is like discovering, while you’re waiting for the bus, you have no pants on.

Yeah, there they are, wittily chatting about current events, glancing your way, hoping you will say something so they can have a good mutual laugh, jumping on your blurted fractured words like the ravenous hyenas they are.

But you know this, so you amiably reach for your seventh dinner role, because you know the lone knife is for butter…pretty sure.

And there’s your sister, blending nicely, and even your little brother, cute little bastard, seems to be one of them, along with mom and dad, all exchanging quips and witticisms.

So you begin to feel a tad self-conscious, and thirsty, since your fourth glass of juice has managed to cause that loaf of dinner rolls to swell to the max in your twisted up stomach.

Something blurts from my mouth

‘Why’d the moron throw the clock out the window?’

‘Whud he say? ‘

snicker giggle giggle giggle....rising, swelling to a tidal wave of uproarious laughter

‘I dunno, Gary, why did the moron do that (snarkle)?’

The beets look pale compared to you.

Only you are smiling, laughing sappily with them.

But, on the inside you’re envisioning Himmler’s storm troopers bashing down the door, and hauling everone outside.

You are untouched, saved actually.

Later you stroll out to the gazebo where everone is flailing away, hanging upside down.
You walk slowly by these relatives of yours, stopping in front of your cousin’s bobbing head.

‘TO EFFING SEE THE EFFING TIME EFFING FLY!!!!’

Later that day, sitting in the gazebo, finally with your own thoughts, you settle your mind with the calming resolution of just writing a book.....



So, you never had relatives like that, you say?

Well, aren't you blessed
 
My father's grandparents raised from when I was 9 years old. They owned a small farm. Each morning before heading off to school, it was my job to collect the eggs and feed the chickens and put fresh water down for them. On weekends, I would clean out the roosts and put in fresh straw. My grandpa had another fellow working for him and they did all the hard labor work until I was 15 when I was taught how to drive the tractor and work the fields in the summer. I was glad to do it for the love and for the very good care they gave to me.
 
Remy said:
She was out of her ever ef-ing mind! She must have been a nightmare to be around. What a whack job.
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Yep, and you know what really bothers me, once I got old enough to realize it, in the area of the U.S. she was from and too many areas too, both when she was living there and still today, there are a lot of people, so many more than what some people realize, who feel the same way she did. Although I've seen it a lot in news stories, etc., I think a lot of people in this country even don't realize that the U.S. is the most "religious" of all the "modern", westernized countries. For instance, it doesn't seem like public figures in other countries talk about religion and what God wants as much as U.S. public figures do.
 
It wasn't so much a rule...but we lived in a two story house and my Mom would put stuff on the stairs to go upstairs..so if any one of us kids was going upstairs..she'd say..take something upstairs...
to this day..I do the same thing..and say it,too. ;)
 
Pepper said:
Pandering.
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Yep
Remy said:
@officerripley I've heard there are places in the U.S. that you would not believe were actually in this country. I've never lived in those areas or very rural.
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I've heard that too and I'm afraid it's true. A single mother with the nicest, smartest little boy you ever met was dating my nephew-in-law for a while and she told me that her son was getting bullied at school and for only one reason. What reason, you ask? Because she had taught him to say "please" and "thank you" and every time he did, he'd get laughed at, socked, stuff thrown at him, etc. because "boys and men should never show weakness like that." And that's a town right here in Calif.
 
Jace said:
It wasn't so much a rule...but we lived in a two story house and my Mom would put stuff on the stairs to go upstairs..so if any one of us kids was going upstairs..she'd say..take something upstairs...
to this day..I do the same thing..and say it,too. ;)
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I always said the same to my daughter and husband... ''never go back without a return load ''... :LOL:
 

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