When did you move?
- Thread starter AzRover
- Start date
Good question. I've been wrestling with that decision as well. I'm just slightly younger than you folks, late 70s. I did downsize out of a big house into a small rancher about 10 years ago when my husband passed. Because of an accident I've started thinking about Independent Living but I have a lot of reservations about it.
I'll just follow along here and see what everyone has to say.
I'll just follow along here and see what everyone has to say.
Kaila
SF VIP
I have been told by a doctor, recently, that wait lists are 4 or 5 or more years long.
I have no idea if that was for certain types, some locations, or if it is very common.
I am Not in the same part of the USA as the OP (original poster of this thread) or as Myrtle, either.
I will follow along here, as well. It is important to at least become informed about the options that might be needed.
I have no idea if that was for certain types, some locations, or if it is very common.
I am Not in the same part of the USA as the OP (original poster of this thread) or as Myrtle, either.
I will follow along here, as well. It is important to at least become informed about the options that might be needed.
I don't know if it's true everywhere but I was told by one place that they have waitlists at certain times of the year and not at others. I failed to ask but I think the waits are probably in the summer. People probably go south in the winter.
hollydolly
SF VIP
- Location
- London England
I always wonder why they call it Independent Living, when surely ..Independent living is when you're living in your own home...
Lee
Senior Member
- Location
- Chatham, Ontario
I do not think age is an indication, age is just a number. Some may be ready at 70, some folks here in our park are still doing well at almost 90.
But I do think some planning in advance is key.
One thing here that is scaring people is the fact that recently people taking up a bed in a hospital for too long can be moved to a long term care facility not in the vicinity of where they live. Imagine....your spouse can be moved up to 100 km away leaving the remaining elderly spouse to travel a great distance to visit. Only other alternative would be to pack up and sell to be closer.
But I do think some planning in advance is key.
One thing here that is scaring people is the fact that recently people taking up a bed in a hospital for too long can be moved to a long term care facility not in the vicinity of where they live. Imagine....your spouse can be moved up to 100 km away leaving the remaining elderly spouse to travel a great distance to visit. Only other alternative would be to pack up and sell to be closer.
Many places in Az don't have wait lists; some do. We both have mobility issues now that make yard care, etc. impossible, even much shopping. So our children say it's time.
Alligatorob
SF VIP
At 70 I am still in the denial stage... I know I should start thinking about it soon.
I'm pretty new at this search but as I understand it these are places that have Independent Living and Assisted Living. Some also have Memory Care and Skilled Nursing units. Some people go in at the Independent level and move up as their needs increase. The bill increases, as well.
At the Independent level you get your meals and enjoy all the activities. You can have your vehicle and keep your own schedule. If you want housekeeping you can pay extra for it, etc.
I will add that it seems to me the costs are much higher to live in a small apt. there than living in my own home. The downside at home is always having to find someone to do the things I can't do.
Have you taken tours of any of the facilities? If so, what did you think of them?
...waiting..for...you know what!
Myquest55
Member
- Location
- Happily in MAINE
My folks moved into a CCRC at about 80yrs. They and all their friends said frequently, they wished they had done it sooner.
We moved from TN to Maine as soon as DH felt he should leave work (fall 2017). Once we settled in, we toured about 6 communities around us. It was great fun and we got a chance to drive around our new location. They all have a Wait List.
One new construction (we didn't visit) in New Hampshire said they had an EIGHT year wait list. Most of the existing ones were about 4-5 years so we put our name on two lists - just in case. Generally they let you stay at the top of the list as long as you like - until you're ready. Only place said we had 3 chances to turn down an apartment then we went to the bottom of the list. So, get on a list ASAP! They take a deposit to put you on their list but you usually get a 100% refund if you ultimately take yourself off the list.
One place is very affordable but farther from where we are now. The other one is pretty pricey but within an easy drive of all our new friends and Drs. They also have a HUGE calendar of events, clubs, trips, gym classes, discussion groups and loads of things to do in house. Eventually we won't be driving as much so that would be great. I turn 68 this year and am already thinking that the one meal in the dining room for dinner is starting to look better and better!! No cooking and clean up for me!
Otherwise, DH has parkinsons so it is possible that he will need Assisted Living before long. There is a facility right in our town - a few blocks away, that has a great reputation. I could stay in the house while he goes there. Then ultimately make the move once he passes. We're not sure but am happy to have options!!
We moved from TN to Maine as soon as DH felt he should leave work (fall 2017). Once we settled in, we toured about 6 communities around us. It was great fun and we got a chance to drive around our new location. They all have a Wait List.
One new construction (we didn't visit) in New Hampshire said they had an EIGHT year wait list. Most of the existing ones were about 4-5 years so we put our name on two lists - just in case. Generally they let you stay at the top of the list as long as you like - until you're ready. Only place said we had 3 chances to turn down an apartment then we went to the bottom of the list. So, get on a list ASAP! They take a deposit to put you on their list but you usually get a 100% refund if you ultimately take yourself off the list.
One place is very affordable but farther from where we are now. The other one is pretty pricey but within an easy drive of all our new friends and Drs. They also have a HUGE calendar of events, clubs, trips, gym classes, discussion groups and loads of things to do in house. Eventually we won't be driving as much so that would be great. I turn 68 this year and am already thinking that the one meal in the dining room for dinner is starting to look better and better!! No cooking and clean up for me!
Otherwise, DH has parkinsons so it is possible that he will need Assisted Living before long. There is a facility right in our town - a few blocks away, that has a great reputation. I could stay in the house while he goes there. Then ultimately make the move once he passes. We're not sure but am happy to have options!!
Continuing Care Retirement Community CCRC
They are all the rage in retirement homes for the elderly and not so elderly these days. The idea is that you enter a community while you are still independent and can take care of yourself. You might remain in Independent Living until you die but if you need Assisted Living or nursing care you can get it in than same facility for a greater price.
I assume they have these in the UK but I don't know. I'm in the US.
Residential buildings here
Or Walden assisted bungalows over 55s
Muskrat
Senior Member
- Location
- Mainly arizona
I will stay in my own home as long as I am able. I could pay for a person to come in weekly to do cleaning (like I really clean deep weekly) and laundry. Stores will deliver groceries here…and between public transportation and taxis and uber I could get around. I am going to avoid facility care as long as possible. It is expensive and did not look fun to me.
That has been my plan too but recently I realized I needed to learn more in case I would need to make a sudden move. They sure want people to think it’s fun in these facilities but I’m not sold, not yet anyway. I do see things I like but I also see very high costs and a lot of reasons to stay where I am until I have to make a change.
Your post is very interesting. I didn’t get the impression that lists are long here but that may be because so many of these facilities are being built. I know of at least 4 going up very close to me. They all seem to have a little different social focus but the social aspect is the hook they use to interest people, that and food.
I hope things go well for your husband and that you settle on a place that works well for you. I understand that a couple can have care tailored exactly to their needs with one independent and the other assisted if needs be.
officerripley
Well-known Member
- Location
- Porlock, Calif
Teacher Terry
Well-known Member
Locally they cost a fortune. My friend went into a one bedroom a year ago because he had Parkinson’s disease. It cost 3300/month. Once he needed assisted living it ran between 5500-8k/month depending on how much help you needed. It was great for him but unless I couldn’t take care of myself I wouldn’t like it. However, it’s a moot point as I can’t afford it. There wasn’t a waiting list.
officerripley
Well-known Member
- Location
- Porlock, Calif
That's about what it costs here too. Where there are waiting lists is the low-income senior apartments. You don't necessarily have to be a low, low-income senior, just can't be above a certain dollar amount, the monthly rent is on a sliding scale and the 4 places like that we have around here are pretty good (not fancy but ok) but there's about a 3 year wait.
Teacher Terry
Well-known Member
I like to own as my environment is important to me and I like to fix my home to suit me. When I divorced and sold the house I bought a condo and my youngest son remodeled it. It’s perfect to age in place as the building has an elevator and my balcony is my yard.
officerripley
Well-known Member
- Location
- Porlock, Calif
There are some pretty nice and well-suited for elderly condos around here but something I worry about that is that since a single elderly female, especially one without kids (which is what my situation will be if Huzz dies or goes permanently into skilled nursing first) is the biggest target for dishonest repair people. And since the roof over your head can be one of the expensive things to repair, a woman in that situation should probably rent where she lives. Renting of course can have its bad sides too and the apartment-kind of condos have less you're-on-your-own repair things than stand-alone condos; but I think for me, renting would be the way to go.
Our children are checking out some, & we hope to do tours of those on their short list. Have 3 pets & a husband having a hard time dealing with this. He loves his tools & bbq eqipment. I am ready to leave the work & cost of our house. Think maybe we waited too long.
officerripley
Well-known Member
- Location
- Porlock, Calif
Except for having no kids and just 1 pet, that's the situation I'm in. And I don't even necessarily want to move into an apartment or senior living; I'd just like to move much closer to town to a place with a much smaller yard. But my huzz says the only way he's ever leaving here is when he's carried out feet-first. And I know we've waited too long; I keep hearing more and more about, and some friends are in the exact situation, of so many elderly people do indeed wait too long and then get stuffed into a bedroom in one of their kids' homes. And even if it's a you'll-just-be-here-'till-a-nice-seniors-place-opens-up situation, the waiting lists can be long at some senior places (especially the better but still affordable ones). And it usually seems to be a husband who's at the bottom of putting it off.