Ever Make A Friend Who Was Once The Enemy?

Lee

Lee

Senior Member
Location
Chatham, Ontario
Some of you may remember my complaints about a neighbor. Can't tell you how many times I wished and prayed they would just move.

Things have changed, she brought over home made cookies and how can you be mad at someone who brings you cookies!

We never discussed what was wrong, I believe if you air the differences then you just start the ball rolling again.

This morning I even planted some annuals on the back side of my house so that it would like nicer than a bare wall.
 

I had something similar happen, many years ago. We were not enemies, just not friends. We both went to the same church, but Nyla had joined during a time when we were living in a different town, and had recently returned.
The pastor had a work day to paint the sanctuary. It was a very small church, and before we moved, myself and my kids were usually the ones who showed up when the pastor needed help.
While we were gone, Nyla and her family were the ones who showed up to help out; so this particular time, both she and i showed up to help paint the sanctuary, and were surprised to see the other one there.

We started painting at opposite ends of the room, and didn’t speak to each other, and the pastor was trying to get a conversation started to involve both of us.
Eventually, we did start talking, and by the end of the day, we had the sanctuary painted and we were becoming good friends. We found we enjoyed each other’s company, and all of our children became friends as well.
Her daughter and my daughter have been best friends for all of these years.
That was 45 years ago, and we have remained close friends for all of the years since then, and she just passed away last fall.
 
No matter how they treat me, I try to treat them respectfully.
I don't know the underlying reasons that are making them act
this way.
I try to look at the situation from a higher perspective than
being immersed in it. (as if I'm watching it from afar)
I'm glad I'm not that soul. I may look at them as being a hurt
animal who needs help.
I realize that soul may be sick or hurt or maybe will die soon,
so you want to treat them with tenderness and compassion.
Maybe they're just in a bad mood and I'm seeing them at their worst.

Yes, One day they can be horrible and the next, sweet as pie!
 
Nada. I try to treat all people respectfully. I have one neighbor who speaks to NO ONE. One day I just helped her lift something because she's frail and she said "thank you" and the whole neighborhood thought it was like a miracle or something but it wasn't. It was a one shot deal and now she is right back to speaking to NO ONE again. I'm not easy when it comes to making a friend. ;)
 
chic said:
Nada. I try to treat all people respectfully. I have one neighbor who speaks to NO ONE. One day I just helped her lift something because she's frail and she said "thank you" and the whole neighborhood thought it was like a miracle or something but it wasn't. It was a one shot deal and now she is right back to speaking to NO ONE again. I'm not easy when it comes to making a friend. ;)
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Well I must be fortunate to have known you as my friend for 9 years... :love:
 
Lee said:
Ever Make A Friend Who Was Once The Enemy?
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Can't really think of many enemies in life... rivals, unfriendly people, etc, but I don't think of them as enemies.

I always bend over backwards to get along with neighbors, so far so good, except once years ago. A guy who beat his wife, but a call to the police seemed to fix that one.

I have had people who were not friends that I decided to try and make a friend of. It usually works, sometimes made good friends that way. Not always though, still seemed worth the effort.

One thing I sometimes have fun with is returning meanness with kindness, really surprises some people, never hurts me. Not all like it, but that's their problem, not mine.
 
I guess I just put up with people anymore, so I have no enemies or friends. Yesterday a woman from my going-to-church days was sitting on a bench just inside Walmart's entrance. I said hello and did my shopping. On the way out I stopped to visit with her. I left feeling depressed and a little angry.

I need to decide that some people are not worth my concern, because mostly, all they do is carry on a monologue describing how miserable their life situation is and then they wait for sympathy. They do it in a way that makes them feel righteous, smiling at their trials.

She kept me standing there for an hour listening to her childish shtick. She is the same as she was 30 years ago and I am glad I don't run into her often. I was only being polite by listening, but that doesn't make her a friend and definitely not a saint. She ain't an enemy either, just another someone I put up with.
 

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