@OldFeller said "... Turn off the water. Then remove the single handle." This part of your post reminded me of the only time i ever used what i consider 'manipulation' rather than direct communication on
any of my husbands.
Our twins were born late June 1975, Dean was a small contractor/handyman so summer his busiest time. We were living in Santa Fe. The kitchen faucet was leaking. Old fashioned one just needed a new washer. i knew how to do it and in those days had plenty of physical strength. But i also had 2 infants, was getting up every 2-3 hrs at night and having to be up almost an hour, because first 1 would breast feed then the other. My day revolved around their needs too.
Dean had been promising to fix that faucet since before the boys were born--but he was champion procrastinator at home. In the fall he would come home on a Friday and say he needed to change oil in his truck. No matter how beautiful the weather he'd wait till twilight Sunday to even start, and then bitch/moan, throw things because he usually had at least a six pack of beer in him by then and his co-ordination not optimum.
i was in a catch 22 situation, i knew him well enough at the point to know he'd actually be mad if i fixed the faucet myself, but i was so tired of it leaking (and i hated the idea of wasting water in a such dry climate). Finally i turned off the water to that faucet and took it apart on a Saturday morning when he'd gone out to do an estimate for a job and i had just put boys down. i had everything needed to complete the job on the counter next to the sink, but tossed the old washer.
My plan had been to say i started it but one of the boys need something and i had to stop. But the boys were still sleeping when he got home so i stood at the sink till he came in, told him 'Boys sleeping, i'll be done here in a minute. He comes over, grunts...actually asked if i'd turned the water off, tho it would have spraying everywhere if i hadn't. "Yes, Just need to reassemble it, can you get out of my light, please?" He says "You're just going to mess it up. You're doing it wrong." i put the new washer and the faucet handle back on counter and replied 'Fine you do it. We'll be without hot water in kitchen sink till you do.'
You have understand that his helper was often at our house weekday mornings and we held poetry group meetings there monthly. As it was some friends teased him because our dog obeyed me better than she did him. His main issue with my fixing it would have been with that aspect as well whatever blow to his pride he felt. Still i was surprised and grateful he finished the job right then instead of waiting till Sunday evening. i thanked him as if it was all his idea, but he stayed grumpy for hours.
..if I'd taken them down already I would just force myself to hang the new ones..
