When Longtime or Active Members Disappear

[David777]

As seniors, one can expect some members will occasionally become fatally sick and pass into eternity. No one gets out of here alive. As some become aware of their coming mortal end, closure on any web boards probably rates low on what is on their minds or interest. Additionally, there are probably many like this person that really don't see any value over bringing into a forum's awareness such personal matters including being ill then having to read a bunch of terse "get well" or RIP type posts regardless of how well-meaning. That noted, there are probably long time regulars that have been used to sharing much about their personal lives that would want to share such.

During the early Internet era, many members on web forums only had Internet access via work computers. So when their employment changed, they lost all their Internet forum accounts. Today the web has matured given the necessity of smartphones for phone and messaging communication so one's employment situation is a generation's dated factor.

 

[Mike]

I too, have wondered about some missing people, I only
posted a PM to one though and I eventually got an answer,
telling me that all was OK and that that person was having
a break for personal reasons, as for others they are many
and after a time, I can only hope they are happy wherever
they are.

Mike.

 

[PeppermintPatty]

Oh yeah, there is some of that all right. Including within the scenes. I left for a while due to things behind the scenes in PM's to me and similar PM's they were sending to others, but after a week or two decided to come back. Then there are things I see in the scenes that made me rethink again, as I know others have. But here, at the moment, I am typing away.

Oh yes. We’ve discussed this.
There was a member I befriended who consistently PM’ed me but only ever to complain about other members here at the site. Even when this was happening I wondered if I am also being gossiped about and the answer was indeed yes. Now that I have proper meds, I’m able to wear my big girl pants once more snd it no longer bothers me. In fact, I love everyone here. Lol

There are people whom I’ve gotten fond of who suddenly disappear. It’s disturbing at times but it’s their chose whether or not they disclose their reasons why.

Some people get sick and die. Harsh but true.

There’s also a long time member who has her own forum. Many members have joined. Some post in both forums and some don’t.
I’m sure they all have their own reasons.

 

[Magna-Carta]

Oh yes. We’ve discussed this.
There was a member I befriended who consistently PM’ed me but only ever to complain about other members here at the site. Even when this was happening I wondered if I am also being gossiped about and the answer was indeed yes. Now that I have proper meds, I’m able to wear my big girl pants once more snd it no longer bothers me. In fact, I love everyone here. Lol

I had that. The person was quite friendly to everyone within the forum, but in private when communicating to me in PM's, in time it was realised they didn't have a good word to say about anyone here.

It can be easy to get drawn into it until it's realised how hypercritical that behavior and person is. It's good to snap out of it and not continue to be part of the same. We just need to be aware, as not everyone who contacts us in PM's is who they first seem. Especially when they start to affect the mental health of others.

I reached out to compare notes with a couple of people, as the person contacting me was affecting my mental health. I left because I felt as though the person was affecting my wellbeing.

The whole thing can snowball and affect others if not careful. It became apparent to me that even discussing the person who is affecting some of us can affect the people we confide in.

We should choose our PM friends wisely, or not at all.

 

[Pepper]

There’s also a long time member who has her own forum. Many members have joined. Some post in both forums and some don’t.

She did NOT start her own forum and has wondered to me why you think so and wish you'd stop saying that. What you are thinking is simply not true.

 

[PeppermintPatty]

She did NOT start her own forum and has wondered to me why you think so and wish you'd stop saying that. What you are thinking is simply not true.

My mistake. I read Avon’s posts about it. You saw the same posts. Did he mean someone else? Since I knew the Lee here used to run a forum( I was a member ), I assumed that he meant her.

I’m not sure which thread it was in now. Maybe Avon meant another Lee. I I don’t really care all that much to be honest. It was an honest mistake on my part.

It was incorrect info then. Check.

 

[PeppermintPatty]

Deleted: .it didn’t sound proper either.