In response to
@Debrah N. I was just talking to my wife this about thoughts I am experiencing from depression. I said. "it’s not as if I wish I were dead, I just want to escape from how I feel”. I don’t want to experience negative desires to remove myself from my present state of being, to stop myself with the only option I know non-life.
Living like this is difficult, my thoughts are an active part of me, I cannot escape from myself to another self less disturbed. I am what I am so I am thinking about life in the hereafter. I do not believe in judgement day or the reward and punishment system dividing saved and the unsaved. As a matter of fact, I have doubts about salvation based upon the acceptance of Jesus in one’s life. Got off on a rabbit trail.
I don’t know after this life ends if there any recognizable traits or spiritual awareness that might identify me from other spirits or entities. If so, I will be the one with a smile on his face.