The act of learning to be patient with others...

Fit4Life

Fit4Life

New Member
Location
Lansdale
Here's a question. When was the last time did you exercise patience (even when you were screaming inside)? I'll go first. I have been learning to exercise patience while driving behind slower drivers...I'm talking about speed limit or below speed limit drivers. One day, I came to the realization that people drive slow for many reasons such as, unable to see the road clearly, not feeling well, just received bad news, had a long day at work, probably crying to or from their destination, elderly driver...

For me, I have been making a conscience effort to give grace to slow drivers (even in the fast lane...and then again...not too much as they should not be in the fast lane in the first place--lol). Not that I will stay behind. But grace in the sense to not get annoyed. Guess what, it feels so good when grace is given to others especially when we are not looking for it to be returned, BUT...grace always finds us in many different ways. Be well everyone and share your "patience" experience. Perhaps in 2024 we can come together and heal others through act of kindness.
 

I’m actually an incredibly patience driver. While I usually love to drive fast, I never, ever tailgate anyone. I don’t care how slow they are going, I will not use aggression to get my way. Tailgating IS a form of aggression.
Slow drivers always have a reason to be driving slow and we don’t have to like it.
I leave so much room between cars that others drivers get annoyed with me,…. But I can handle it.
 

I'm better with patience after being retired. But what used to really get to me were the cashiers and people who would start conversations (about the weather or whatever) while there were a zillion people in line. The cashier could always say, I'm sorry but it is busy, I can't really talk now. But no, the cashier just yaks, yaks, yaks. Or the cashier starts the conversation, are you kidding me?
 
I'm patient except when I'm driving. I pulled into a parking lot today behind a very slow driver who took forever to turn down the row of parking spaces. I honked my horn, then realized she was very elderly. A guy walking through the parking lot gave me the "stink eye". I try to remind myself not to get so worked up over slow drivers. I'll admit I need to do better.

The only drivers that I will continue to have no patience for are the ones that sit at a green light or are very slow to move because they have their phones in their faces.

A belated welcome, and I love your post!

welcome from Dallas.jpeg
 
I live in the sticks, so it's most country roads around here. Do I ever want to strangle the guy doing 20 mph in a 45 zone? Oh, yeah. Also, on my 'hit list' is the guy, at a red light, who takes all the time in the world to get going, so only two cars get through. Then, there's two old friends chatting away , and holding up the checkout lane..........Thankfully, I get relief by just thinking of strangling them.
 
live in an area that gets very little snow and many do not know how to drive when slick .....
just yesterday one pulled out in front of me and crawled down street........ it was a too close for them to pull out when dry let alone icy and then to not even barely move ................they turned around and literally blocked the driveway to my workplace .......... they must have thought i was following them when i drove around to gO to work i hope they caught a clue on their own

i just smiled and waved when i would have liked to tell them the truth of their behavior .... but i just let it go.
 
Paco Dennis said:
I like your post. I too have tried to put patience near the top of my behavioral mod list. The counting to 20 usually gives me enough time to calm by knee jerk reactions. :)
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Excellent. Is there anything in particular you are working on as it relates to patience. Being aware of our behavior which can have an impact on our stress level as well as with others is the key and the beginning. You be well my friend.
 
PeppermintPatty said:
I’m actually an incredibly patience driver. While I usually love to drive fast, I never, ever tailgate anyone. I don’t care how slow they are going, I will not use aggression to get my way. Tailgating IS a form of aggression.
Slow drivers always have a reason to be driving slow and we don’t have to like it.
I leave so much room between cars that others drivers get annoyed with me,…. But I can handle it.
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Excellent. Is there anything in particular you are working on as it relates to patience, since you appear to have a very good control when driving. The driving was my example and what I have worked on. Being aware of our behavior which can have an impact on our stress level as well as with others is the key and the beginning. You be well my friend.
 
Having worked for many years in nursing homes, patience was part of my job. Sometimes my patience wears thin when waiting for someone to pick me to go somewhere. Waiting and worrying about the weather or the time. Yesterday I was in this situation and I just told myself I was lucky to have someone come and pick me up to do my errands. Plus the time doesn't really matter. And the person picking me up can drive in any kind of weather. So I just let it go.
 
LoveTulips said:
I'm better with patience after being retired. But what used to really get to me were the cashiers and people who would start conversations (about the weather or whatever) while there were a zillion people in line. The cashier could always say, I'm sorry but it is busy, I can't really talk now. But no, the cashier just yaks, yaks, yaks. Or the cashier starts the conversation, are you kidding me?
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Funny...hehehehe. Yes! I know the situ so very well my friend. So, tell me, now that you are aware, are you better at being patient in this situ? What do you do if this were to happen again. I am asking you all these life challenging questions, so we all can learn and grow together while exercising more kindness and love to one another. Life cannot be focus on negativity.
 
Fit4Life said:
Here's a question. When was the last time did you exercise patience (even when you were screaming inside)? I'll go first. I have been learning to exercise patience while driving behind slower drivers...I'm talking about speed limit or below speed limit drivers. One day, I came to the realization that people drive slow for many reasons such as, unable to see the road clearly, not feeling well, just received bad news, had a long day at work, probably crying to or from their destination, elderly driver...

For me, I have been making a conscience effort to give grace to slow drivers (even in the fast lane...and then again...not too much as they should not be in the fast lane in the first place--lol). Not that I will stay behind. But grace in the sense to not get annoyed. Guess what, it feels so good when grace is given to others especially when we are not looking for it to be returned, BUT...grace always finds us in many different ways. Be well everyone and share your "patience" experience. Perhaps in 2024 we can come together and heal others through act of kindness.
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I have decided to be quiet and fully hear or experience the situation or person before reacting. Usually, I just remain quiet and go on, think it over for a day or just keep it to myself. Usually, I will respond only if it helps the other person. Sometimes, it is difficult, but the hard situations can teach me something I never expected.
 
Fit4Life said:
Excellent. Is there anything in particular you are working on as it relates to patience. Being aware of our behavior which can have an impact on our stress level as well as with others is the key and the beginning. You be well my friend.
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Exactly, stress is what I try to have a handle on. While driving, I stay as calm as possible, let them pass, and I drive on less traveled roads. Less stress that way.
 
seadoug said:
I'm patient except when I'm driving. I pulled into a parking lot today behind a very slow driver who took forever to turn down the row of parking spaces. I honked my horn, then realized she was very elderly. A guy walking through the parking lot gave me the "stink eye". I try to remind myself not to get so worked up over slow drivers. I'll admit I need to do better.

The only drivers that I will continue to have no patience for are the ones that sit at a green light or are very slow to move because they have their phones in their faces.

A belated welcome, and I love your post!

View attachment 325968
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Thanks for liking my post. My purpose in this life is to bring people/us together and discuss life issues and challenges in a positive light. It starts from us to lead by example. So much negativity in this world as you know, and it is tough for many who don't know who are where to turn to in order to help encourage and uplift their spirits. We are not perfect beings.

However, if we make a small effort each day towards being kind to one another, we can possibly save a life or bring healing in a loving way. Enough of negativity! Let's try to always see the good in even the worst situations. I say that only because seeing "good" will eliminate mental stress. When we are unable to see the "good" in horrible situations, then we ought to close that window in our minds unless we can offer help in that particular situation. The world will always have bad. BUT, but, but, it will always have good.

Now...lol...with you being aware of this morning's situation. Did you feel bad after you have learned it was an elderly person? We all are going to get there one day and the universe is watching and taking notes. I'm glad that you were honest and able to share. Keep up my friend and be encouraged....
 
Fit4Life said:
Excellent. Is there anything in particular you are working on as it relates to patience, since you appear to have a very good control when driving. The driving was my example and what I have worked on. Being aware of our behavior which can have an impact on our stress level as well as with others is the key and the beginning. You be well my friend.
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YES! Unfortunately I don’t have the same patience with people online but now that’s you’ve asked me that I’m absolutely certain that I CAN have more patience. I don’t have to agree with what they are saying. They have every right to their opinion regardless of how I feel.

From now on I shall treat others like they are unsure drivers. I’ll treat them with patience and kindness. If anyone sees me treating someone else kindly please let me know either online or via PM. I wish to treat everyone with patience and kindness.

Thank you for bringing this to my attention.
It’s given me an entirely different perspective that I’m grateful of. 👍💕
 
I have been told I am very patient. It would have been difficult to have a career in education without it. Dealing with hundreds of students every year, plus parents, faculty, administrators and the public - it would have been impossible without patience.
The one thing I still have no patience for is willful ignorance/stupidity. When someone knows better, but prefers not to rise above that unfortunate habit. It leads to so many sad endings, but nothing can be done about it.
 
PeppermintPatty said:
YES! Unfortunately I don’t have the same patience with people online but now that’s you’ve asked me that I’m absolutely certain that I CAN have more patience. I don’t have to agree with what they are saying. They have every right to their opinion regardless of how I feel.

From now on I shall treat others like they are unsure drivers. I’ll treat them with patience and kindness. If anyone sees me treating someone else kindly please let me know either online or via PM. I wish to treat everyone with patience and kindness.

Thank you for bringing this to my attention.
It’s given me an entirely different perspective that I’m grateful of. 👍💕
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Awwwww...that's very candid of you to admit. It is much appreciated. This is the beginning of change..., when one is willing to admit behaviors to which they/we know from deep within is not becoming. Kindness always, always, always wins even when it is painful to do so. We don't have to see the reward; it comes in small doses often times unknown to us.

Imagine having a "kindness" jar, and one day when the time is drawing near (if you know what I mean--wink), we can then look back at that jar and have that warm smile in our hearts knowing what we have done to our fellow brothers and sisters with our act of kindness. This is the true reward, not necessarily material things. Having that peace of mind regardless...Stay up my friend and keep going. You be well.
 
Jules said:
How important is it? That’s the question I ask myself many times when frustrated by the actions of others.
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Great question to ask. Absolutely, patience is important once it is applied in the correct manner. There are different levels of being patient. Immediately reacting to something because we feel differently causes stress to everyone and the result is never positive. As you know, stress is a killer...hypertension. Why create that when we are aware of the damage. It would be good as individuals if we all do our part by way of destressing and exercising a little more patience.

At the end of the day, that person goes about their business and because of stress you/we end up being constipated (lol). We can do better once we are aware. Being patience is an act of kindness--to ourselves and others. Be well my friend and thanks for the question.
 
Nathan said:
Exercising patience is not a virtue or some magnanimous act, it is for your own peace.

🧘‍♂️ ☮️ 🙏
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Patience is a quality that allows us to live healthier lives. It works alongside kindness. Yes, I agree it is for our own peace. But at the same time, we cannot just do things just for ourselves. Having patience also help others once we are able to exercise this act. It is giving of ourselves to others as well.

When we are patient, we are kind to ourselves and to others. I appreciate your feedback as we are here to help each other become better people in this society by promoting positive energy. Stay up my friend and continue to be encourage. Be well...
 
Fit4Life said:
Awwwww...that's very candid of you to admit. It is much appreciated. This is the beginning of change..., when one is willing to admit behaviors to which they/we know from deep within is not becoming. Kindness always, always, always wins even when it is painful to do so. We don't have to see the reward; it comes in small doses often times unknown to us.

Imagine having a "kindness" jar, and one day when the time is drawing near (if you know what I mean--wink), we can then look back at that jar and have that warm smile in our hearts knowing what we have done to our fellow brothers and sisters with our act of kindness. This is the true reward, not necessarily material things. Having that peace of mind regardless...Stay up my friend and keep going. You be well.
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Wow! I love how you think. Kindness always wins. You’re right and I love the kindness jar idea.

Your example about driving was exceptionally helpful. I hate tailgating. Leaving sufficient space between cars is not only more polite, it’s safer for ALL!

If I used my strategy for everyday living, I’d be managing my own stressful behaviour. At times my posts have been the equivalent to an impatiently aggressive driver honking the horn to anyone who got in my way. I can see that now. 🤔

Thank you for helping me understand that part of me better. I like the way you think and am very glad you joined us. 💜
 
CallMeKate said:
Why do I feel as if I'm in a classroom or some kind of seminar? :unsure:
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Is that good or bad? I am here to promote "positive energy" and have a discussion on various topics which can be challenging to all of us (me included). I am learning as well. If you prefer conversations that do not add value to you as an individual, then I guess, you may not appreciate what I am doing. Hope this answers your question.
 

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