Just feel uncomfortable Flying

I try to avoid crowded situations as much as possible. I don't have a fear of flying but I get anxiety being around so many people from the time I arrive at the airport to catch a flight up to leaving the airport when I arrive at the destination. I wish you luck with your trips this month and hope that your experiences are better that previous ones.
 

1960s. Pick up tickets from the travel agent. Arrive at the airport about 30 minutes ahead of the scheduled flight time. Check bags at the curb. Airport was clean and generally not crowded. Grab a newspaper or magazine on the way to boarding gate. No "security area". When boarding was announced, stroll out onto the tarmac, accompanied by family or friends if they had come to see you off, and board the plane.

Planes were clean and seats were reasonably comfortable - even in economy class. Flights were rarely full. Stewardesses were courteous, friendly and helpful. Passengers were well dressed and, for the most part, courteous. Real food was served on real dishes with real silverware and was included in the cost of your fare. On arrival at the destination, pick up bags at baggage claim and head for the cab stand or rental car desk. Overall, it was a rather nice experience.

I was a "million miler" on Delta and nearly so on United. Over the years the air travel experience has steadily declined, with a sharp drop off beginning in the mid-1990s. Toward the end of my career flying had become a horror. I haven't flown for about five years now but I understand it's continued to get worse. I don't expect to fly ever again. I feel bad for the younger generations who have to put up with this.
 
Feelslikefar said:
We have a 2 trips scheduled in May, flying both times.
I wanted to drive, but the distances are just too far.

You would think that after all the air miles I've logged in the Air Force,
flying wouldn't be a big thing.

I don't have a fear of flying per se, but I've always felt very uncomfortable every time I fly.
I tough it out, sit quietly, hands gripping the arm rest on take offs and landing.
People around me must think it's my first time flying.
I've tried using headphones to listen to my music, but gave that up.
Seems I need to hear what's going on around me.
Can't medicate, because I need to pick-up rental cars and don't need that problem.

Hoping that these trips will be different.
I even called a friend who was a pilot in the USAF for many years and we talked about some things
for me to try.

Don't want to give up traveling and exploring, just the parts of getting there and back.
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I have a friend who doesn't like traveling in general. But she goes along with her hubby because that is part of the deal, as is true in most marriages. They have decided to upgrade to Business Class whenever possible to make it more bearable for her. She can afford it, but it's still like triple the cost of coach.

I know many people cannot afford Business Class, but if you can, you might want to consider it. It is much nicer there than in coach.
 

A bit of the same feeling as being a hundred or two feet in the air on some crazy rollercoaster. If this thing goes amuck, my life on this earth will be at an end! But I ride on both, just the same.
 
MarkinPhx said:
When I was younger and made the trips from Phoenix to SD or the LA area I always flew. Now it is so much easier to take the six hour drive instead of putting up with everything you listed.
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When making a drive or fly decision, you easily add 1 hour to the airport, and 2 more hours in the airport. So a four hour drive becomes a 7 hour flight. However as jujube said sometimes there isn't another choice. Oh well.
 
You can use pills, booze or whatever your choice of sedation is, but in reality, the only way to get past this type of fear is to change your attitude. Takeoffs and landings are now easier to perform than they were just 20 years ago.

I think when the plane is descending and breaking through any clouds will cause the plane to rock from the turbulence inside the clouds. Clouds cause the air to be unstable, so whether the plane is ascending or descending, if the plane is breaking through clouds, the plane is going to rock, which does scare flyers that are already nervous.

Landings have become routine today with most all airports having an ILS landing system, which guides the plane to the ground both vertically and horizontally using radio waves. Just keep in mind that when you takeoff and the plane is climbing out and goes through clouds, the plane is going to rock. Not a big deal.

I remember having a new First Officer (F/O) flying with me. He asked if he could handle the takeoff and I told him sure. We were flying a B-737 on this flight. The plane in front of us was a United 747-4. A huge difference in sizes between the two planes. The plane in front had taken off just one minute before we were cleared for takeoff. I was on the radio, so I told the ATC, we would like to hold for another minute to avoid any wake turbulence. The ATC came back and said, he missed seeing that we were a 737, so no problem, I will call you when the 747 gets 5 miles out. About a minute and a half later, the ATC said we were clear for takeoff.

I told the F/O to go when he’s ready. He said “I’m on the roll.” I pushed the accelerator handles all the way forward, released the break and off we went. If I remember correctly, we had a good takeoff.

Most planes now have onboard colored Doppler radar. We can see what clouds are ok and what clouds to avoid.

Relax and enjoy the flight.
 
@oldman, thanks for the encouragement to 'relax and enjoy the flight'.
Know you have logged way more hours than I have.

I used the term 'uncomfortable' instead of 'fear' of flying.
To be quite honest, I'm not sure what part of the flight makes me uncomfortable.

In the 20+ years in the USAF, I have flown on C-130's, (my favorite if I had to choose one) KC-135's, KC-10's, C-5's to get where I needed to be.
Even allowed myself to take a flight in a T-38 2-seater!

As always, if I need to get there, I will remain calm and wait for it to be over.
 
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Feelslikefar said:
@oldman, thanks for the encouragement to 'relax and enjoy the flight'.
Know you have logged way more hours than I have.

I used the term 'uncomfortable' instead of 'fear' of flying.
To be quite honest, I'm not sure what part of the flight makes me uncomfortable.

In the 20+ years in the USAF, I have flown on C-130's, (my favorite if I had to choose one) KC-135's, KC-10's, C-5's to get where I needed to be.
Even allowed myself to take a flight in a T-38 2-seater!

As always, if I need to get there, I will remain calm and wait for it to be over.
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I flew on a C130 for a short distance coming back from Vietnam. I never thought that thing was going to get off the ground. Do they still use that plane?
 
oldman said:
You can use pills, booze or whatever your choice of sedation is, but in reality, the only way to get past this type of fear is to change your attitude. Takeoffs and landings are now easier to perform than they were just 20 years ago.
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On the same flight from Germ. 2 SLC (granted it was in '67, so we're talking 56 years ago). Coming into Boston we had some issues but nothing to worry about, sitting in our section was a flight crew (USAF) member with 30 years. He was explaining every move the pilots made, calming everyone around. Until we were on the next leg coming into S.C. and one of the stewardesses mentioned the pilot had been flying 14+ hours with no relief. That made the crew member darn nervous.

Then landing we started rocking, the wing tips barely missed the ground (or at least to me) which made our expert really nervous. In fact I was white knuckled & the 30 year crew member was I think having heart problems, eyes bulging & very vocal. No one was relaxed not even members of the cabin crew. No one said anything but were sure glad when the plane stopped rolling. The whole flight (from takeoff to final landing) was a learning experience I don't want to do again.
 
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I survived my 4 times on an airplane (there and back home) and have to admit I enjoyed the experience.
Took an Uber to the airport and that was the way to go because of all the construction going on.

First trip was to Panama City, Florida where we picked up the rental car and drove to Fort Walton Beach
for my good friend's retirement.

The wife walked up to the Airline Kiosk, scanned the QR code on her phone and printed our boarding passes
and our baggage tags.
Put them on and handed the person our bags and we were on our way.

She had also applied to get TSA Precheck for us both and it sure was nice to bypass the long lines.
Good for 5 years and will make future trips less stressful. (for me)

Second trip was to see my brother in California and we repeated the process.

Hats off to all the members of the flight crew on both trips, very professional and I just relaxed for the first time in
quite a while flying.

Since I 'did so well' on these trips, we are planning to fly into Miami, pick up a rental car and a long stay on the 'KEYS' of Florida.
 
Hope you enjoy staying on the Keys. I never liked Key West, but you might. We are all different, so who knows. Silver Airways flies a lot of flights out to the Keys. They fly kind of older aircraft.

You should plan on fishing out there. The fishing is very good in that area.
 
Something that has been on my 'bucket list' is taking a cruise on the orginal 'African Queen'
boat from the 1951 movie.
Based out of Key Largo and we'll book a trip.

Wife said I could book a couple of day fishing trips and she would shop.
 
Feelslikefar said:
We have a 2 trips scheduled in May, flying both times.
I wanted to drive, but the distances are just too far.

You would think that after all the air miles I've logged in the Air Force,
flying wouldn't be a big thing.

I don't have a fear of flying per se, but I've always felt very uncomfortable every time I fly.
I tough it out, sit quietly, hands gripping the arm rest on take offs and landing.
People around me must think it's my first time flying.
Something that has been on my 'bucket list' is taking a cruise on the orginal 'African Queen'
boat from the 1951 movie.
Click to expand...

That's me to a tee! There was a school friend that I knew who married an American and settled in Savannah, Georgia. For many years we exchanged visits, alas she and her husband are now both deceased, so we no longer cross The Atlantic.

But getting back to flying. Before boarding I would make sure that I relieved myself, I would abstain from any liquids hours before boarding. When I got on the aircraft I had the window seat, not to enjoy the view but sitting there meant I didn't have to move to allow someone else access to the gangway. Once in my seat I buckled up and stayed there, declining all sustenance. Believe me, I managed the ten hour flight without food, water or bladder relief. My wife was used to it but the cabin crew were always concerned. I once pointed that concern out, to my wife. "They are trained to look for people like you," she said, as though I had done something wrong.

Mercifully we haven't been on a plane for over six years, hopefully I might have had my last flight.

Something that has been on my 'bucket list' is taking a cruise on the orginal 'African Queen'
My wife has a similar reaction to travelling on water as I do flying. What a pair we are. However when we celebrated our ruby anniversary we travelled by train, The Orient Express no less, and it was steam hauled.
 
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horseless carriage said:
That's me to a tee! There was a school friend that I knew who married an American and settled in Savannah, Georgia. For many years we exchanged visits, alas she and her husband are now both deceased, so we no longer cross The Atlantic.

But getting back to flying. Before boarding I would make sure that I relieved myself, I would abstain from any liquids hours before boarding. When I got on the aircraft I had the window seat, not to enjoy the view but sitting there meant I didn't have to move to allow someone else access to the gangway. Once in my seat I buckled up and stayed there, declining all sustenance. Believe me, I managed the ten hour flight without food, water or bladder relief. My wife was used to it but the cabin crew were always concerned. I once pointed that concern out, to my wife. "They are trained to look for people like you," she said, as though I had done something wrong.

Mercifully we haven't been on a plane for over six years, hopefully I might have had my last flight.

Something that has been on my 'bucket list' is taking a cruise on the orginal 'African Queen'
My wife has a similar reaction to travelling on water as I do flying. What a pair we are. However when we celebrated our ruby anniversary we travelled by train, The Orient Express no less, and it was steam hauled.
Click to expand...
I have been on the African Queen out of Port Largo. I have a picture of it somewhere, but I think it may be on the other computer.
 
I agree with Horseless Carriage about sitting in either the middle - if I'm travelling with Mrs.L, or window seat, even on short trips. When I used to commute weekly to Hamburg, I flew with what I called, 'Incontinence airlines'. There were a number of regulars on the flight who always had to use the toilets mid flight.

It was a really 'relaxed' airline.. The safety briefing was along the lines of, 'If you're a regular flyer, you probably know the safety briefing off by heart, so just go on reading your newspaper'. In the end I did know the briefings off by heart in three languages.
 
I realize that taking a trip on the African Queen, passing modern hotels and such,
won't be the same.
Even so, the boat will still be where Bogie and Kate once interacted so well.

Back in the 80's, we took a trip to Liverpool to show the boys where the Beatles got their start.
Our oldest son was 14 and seemed bored with it all, but he enjoyed being out and about.
We took the famous Mersey Ferry and during the trip over, my oldest asked 'mom, what's wrong with dad?'
Seems I was staring, trance like at the stairs and my wife told him 'dad's just listening to a song in his head'.
I could picture Gerry Marsden and the band playing 'the' song on board.

Hard to explain. Memories can be a very powerful thing...
 
You could try what I do. Before takeoff, I try to relax every part of my body. Kind of like when you go to bed. While I am doing this I take deep breaths. Nice deep yoga breaths. I wonder, do you also have motion sickness? If so, maybe take some type of motion sickness remedy. I used to try Dramamine but that makes me so sleepy and probably wouldn't work for you either. But there are other motion sickness remedies out there.

My husband who is a private pilot is amused by my preparations, but hey, whatever works. One of my first times flying was on a date with him. I don't know why but I trusted him completely. I have never had fear of flying in a small plane. Maybe trust in your pilot has a lot to do with your feeling of uncomfortableness?
 
I have flown for United for 33 years and have had to calm many first-time flyers, so they could relax. People used to ask me what can they take to reax before a flight. Aside from alcohol, I always suggested going to their family doctor and asking for an anxiety drug or any beta blocker.

There is no reason to be nervous or fearful of a takeoff or a landing. Aviation has improved so much that taking off and landing have become simplified. I also suggest taking the first flight in the morning so that you will get the most rested pilots compared to the pilots that have been flying all day and now it's 10 at night and they are tired. Fatigue used to be one of the top 5 reasons for airplanes going down or crashing on landing. Those days are long gone.

Get onboard to your seat, stow your bags, sit down, relax and enjoy the flight. Pilots are well trained and ready, willing and able to give their passengers a great flight to their destination.
 
I never minded flying until a 3 hour horrible flight in a bad storm in 2002. People were crying, praying and the flight attendants were strapped in among the passengers for safety. When someone asked the attendant a question she said it didn’t matter because we were all going to die.

It was so traumatic that I took the train home which took 3 days because I couldn’t get on a plane. I had other trips booked so went to my doctor and she gave me Xanax to fly. I’m always surprised when people mention beta blockers for anxiety since I have been on them for 20 years for HBP and they don’t help with anxiety.

The last few years I was finally starting to feel comfortable flying and didn’t always need the Xanax. But this year with all the issues planes are having especially with the horrible turbulence and people getting hurt I really don’t want to fly again. I flew 4 hours to see family 2 months ago and will do it again in 3 months. I have a trip planned to Europe next April and don’t know if I will go.
 
When someone asked the attendant a question she said it didn’t matter because we were all going to die.
This is a joke, right?

I have flown through what is known as "clear air turbulence," which can be very hazardous and even vicious at times. There are no clouds in the sky and there is no indication of turbulence on the radar screen. It kind of rocks your mind a bit because you know as the Captain that your passengers are either frightened or very nervous. CAT can throw you around that makes a person very afraid. I try to calm my passengers by talking to them over the intercom and tell them "We are experiencing some heavy turbulence at the moment, but I am working to getting us out of it.

I call the Traffic Controllers and ask them if anyone is reporting rough turbulence or smooth rides and at what level are they flying. If I'm flying at 41,000 ft, it may be possible to get smoother air at 34,000 ft. I have had Captains in planes call over the radio and ask other pilots if they have smooth air and at what level. I have done this several times.

Here is one report of CAT and what it can do:
On December 28, 1997, United Airlines Flight 826 was operated by a Boeing 747-100 flying from New Tokyo International Airport (Narita), Japan to Honolulu International Airport, Hawaii. Two hours into the flight, at an altitude of 31,000 feet (9,400 m), the plane received reports of severe clear-air turbulence in the area and the seat belt sign was turned on. Moments later, the aircraft suddenly dropped around 100 feet (30 m), seriously injuring 15 passengers and 3 crew members.[2] The plane turned around and landed safely back in Tokyo, but one passenger, a 32-year-old Japanese woman, died.

That was a tragedy and all of us at United felt very sorry for the family of the man that died. But, this is a reason and a lesson as to why each passenger should keep belted during a flight. This can happen at a moment's notice.
 
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OldMan, no it isn’t a joke. She actually said that and she was in the seat right in front of me. I couldn’t believe it and the weather was so bad that eventually the entire airport shutdown.

Until that episode I loved to fly. I took the train home after the vacation going from New York to Nevada. I couldn’t get on a plane to go home.
 
Whoever the F/A was, she's lucky if she still has a job with United. Maybe she was afraid enough that she quit and became a conductor on a train. Flying is not for the faint of heart. There are times when things can get nasty, but you live by remembering your training and following the teachings you learned, just like anything in life.

I have been through some pretty nasty weather. One thing I learned early in my career was to never fly over top of a tornado. That's just plain stupid and yet, I did it. I learned not to do it again, but once is one too many times. I landed in Chicago during a blizzard. ATC told me the runway was clear of snow and snow and ice repellent had been applied. That was a lie. As soon as my wheels touched down at O'Hare, I felt the plane start to move to the left very quickly. Luckily, I was able to get the plane back to the center of the runway before we got to the end where the threshold lines are painted. We saved United a plane that day.

I tell people all the time not to be afraid to fly. Flying today is much safer and simpler than it was just 20 years ago.
 
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