What would a new beginning look like for you?

Let's get this thread going, what would a new beginning look like for you?
 
I'd like to start over, but this time with different parents. I felt like my mother hated me, and that's a hell of a thing for a kid to grow up thinking. I thought it was my fault that she felt that way and that there must have been something wrong with me. I felt ashamed of being alive and that I was such a disappointment to my parents. I've felt enormous shame for much of my life.

So, yeah, a "new beginning" would start with my childhood.
 
I would like not to be nervous and have feelings of incompetence. I have lost so much confidence in myself. I would like not to shake, which makes me more nervous. I want to feel strong again even though I am losing physical strength.

eta
@hollydolly just reminded me I wish I had more self control. I'm losing so much, all around. Being old is the reason, but not the excuse. I have to try harder
 
Body is something I have been able to influence including recently.

Nobody told us in our early 20s about US retirement or estate planning. I was in a way lucky with well paying jobs and then employers reaching out to me. Now I would go the other route. Start from scratch in the US and have a career path lined out. But play by ear worked to e.
 
A new beginning for me would have to be due to what I already know.

In youth, I was one lucky kid — REALLY LUCKY after hearing stories from folks on both sides of the internet.

Assuming the finances were there in a different life, I would have done a lot more trail riding that required being gone for days and a trailer with living quarters.

Disgruntled as I have been at various times in my life, I truly don’t have anything to complain about to wish for a redo, unless it would be making more money early in life.

This is my idea of a killer bod —conditioned to sit on a horse on rough trails for 6-8 hours.

This was 20 years ago, so I was 57. Trust me I don’t look anything like this now - arthritis has taken its toll. I was riding that horse for someone and tried to buy the handsome lad. The guy said if I liked him that much he was doubling the price- he did and I came home minus the horse who was a Spotted Walker.

IMG_4253.jpeg
 
Imogene said:
A new beginning for me would have to be due to what I already know.

In youth, I was one lucky kid — REALLY LUCKY after hearing stories from folks on both sides of the internet.

Assuming the finances were there in a different life, I would have done a lot more trail riding that required being gone for days and a trailer with living quarters.

Disgruntled as I have been at various times in my life, I truly don’t have anything to complain about to wish for a redo, unless it would be making more money early in life.

This is my idea of a killer bod —conditioned to sit on a horse on rough trails for 6-8 hours.

This was 20 years ago, so I was 57. Trust me I don’t look anything like this now - arthritis has taken its toll. I was riding that horse for someone and tried to buy the handsome lad. The guy said if I liked him that much he was doubling the price- he did and I came home minus the horse who was a Spotted Walker.

View attachment 381635
Click to expand...
You look beautiful.
This is me on a horse. Like yourself, I’d have spent more time on a horse, doing various trails and working in the barn brushing horses, feeding them etc.

I’d have spent less time trying to get others to like me. I’d have worked on my self esteem issues more. I’d have been my best friend.
I’d have worked harder on my relationships with my parents. I’d have gone hand gliding and parasailing 🪂 more often. I’d have taken photos of the musical bands I saw and put them in an album.

I wouldn’t have been so worried about other disappointing people.
IMG_3832.jpeg
 
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PeppermintPatty said:
You look beautiful.
This is me on a horse. Like yourself, I’d have spent more time on a horse, doing various trails and working in the barn brushing horses, feeling them etc.

I’d have spent less time trying to get others to like me. I’d have worked on my self esteem issues more. I’d have been my best friend.
I’d have worked harder on my relationships with my parents. I’d have gone hand gliding and parasailing 🪂 more often. I’d have taken photos of the musical bands I saw and put them in an album.

I wouldn’t have been so worried about other disappointing people.
Click to expand...

You also look beautiful!

I think it’s a woman’s inherent trait to want to please and worry about disappointing others. My English mom and her mom leaned that way. Not so much my Eastern European paternal grandmother. Looking back, I am more like her in that regard. I care but I never lost sleep over it.

That trail looks interesting and fun🤠🤠
 
Imogene said:
A new beginning for me would have to be due to what I already know.

In youth, I was one lucky kid — REALLY LUCKY after hearing stories from folks on both sides of the internet.

Assuming the finances were there in a different life, I would have done a lot more trail riding that required being gone for days and a trailer with living quarters.

Disgruntled as I have been at various times in my life, I truly don’t have anything to complain about to wish for a redo, unless it would be making more money early in life.

This is my idea of a killer bod —conditioned to sit on a horse on rough trails for 6-8 hours.

This was 20 years ago, so I was 57. Trust me I don’t look anything like this now - arthritis has taken its toll. I was riding that horse for someone and tried to buy the handsome lad. The guy said if I liked him that much he was doubling the price- he did and I came home minus the horse who was a Spotted Walker.

View attachment 381635
Click to expand...

PeppermintPatty said:
You look beautiful.
This is me on a horse. Like yourself, I’d have spent more time on a horse, doing various trails and working in the barn brushing horses, feeling them etc.

I’d have spent less time trying to get others to like me. I’d have worked on my self esteem issues more. I’d have been my best friend.
I’d have worked harder on my relationships with my parents. I’d have gone hand gliding and parasailing 🪂 more often. I’d have taken photos of the musical bands I saw and put them in an album.

I wouldn’t have been so worried about other disappointing people.
View attachment 381641
Click to expand...
I vote same person, different horse ;)
 
Pepper said:
I would like not to be nervous and have feelings of incompetence. I have lost so much confidence in myself. I would like not to shake, which makes me more nervous. I want to feel strong again even though I am losing physical strength.

eta
@hollydolly just reminded me I wish I had more self control. I'm losing so much, all around. Being old is the reason, but not the excuse. I have to try harder
Click to expand...
You gals just keep on doin' . You're both fun folks on this forum and I enjoy your wisdom and wit !;)
 
If we're talking about a physical do-over, I'd have appreciated a better back and longer legs so it would be easier to stay on a horse. But then I suppose I'd have missed out on riding large pony / small cob size horses.

It would have been nice to be less introverted and socially awkward. And I really wish I could carry a tune, hit a note, anything other than the horrid screechy stuff that is my attempt at singing. Oh, some dancing ability would have been pleasant, I can't even manage a line dance because of turning the wrong way, using the wrong foot, etc. Sighhhh.

Colorado.jpg Mischief WelshCob.jpg
 
A new beginning? Well, it would be a kick if I'd turned out straight rather than gay. That said, I'm not sure I would have worked as hard to compensate. Hard work led to success. It would certainly have been easier to be straight from my teenage years to my 40's, but things got better and I wouldn't give up my comfortable life with my partner of 33 years.

Facebook.jpgIMG_9393.jpg
 
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